Death Wish 101

Wanye
December 02 2008 05:12PM

Wow Sean Avery. You are probably going to have a hit on you within hours. We can't believe the garbage that comes out of his mouth. And this from someone who once called Craig MacTavish a :"silly nanny" and hid under a pile of coats till it was all over. But he has really done it now.

According to TSN:

The NHL has suspended Dallas Stars' forward Sean Avery indefinitely, pending a hearing with NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman, and Avery will not be playing in tonight's game against the Calgary Flames.

Avery is being suspended for disparaging remarks he made this morning in reference to Calgary player Dion Phaneuf and Phaneuf's girl friend Elisha Cuthbert, who previously had a relationship with Avery.

What did Avery say you ask?

What a fantastic question. Try this on for size. "I am really happy to be back in Calgary, I love Canada, I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds.  I don't know what that's about.  Enjoy the game tonight."

How did Dallas take the news?

Stars owner Tom Hicks made the following statement on the Stars site: "Had the league not have suspended him, the Dallas Stars would have. This organization will not tolerate such behaviour, especially from a member of our hockey team. We hold our team to a higher standard and will continue to do so."

WOW Avery. Someone will kill you. If someone dropped a sloppy seconds bomb on me I'd beat the crap out of them. And I'm me. Avery just said that to Dion Phaneuf!

You can begin your comments now.

Gracias Senior MSG por helpo

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#1 baggedmilk
December 02 2008, 05:32PM
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I can't be the only one that thinks this is hilarious?

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#2 Joey Moss
December 02 2008, 05:33PM
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i would have enjoyed the game tonight had the league not put their nose where it doesnt belong and suspended this guy over a pretty harmless remark as far as things go (it wasnt racist, he wasnt railing against homosexuals, etc.)

this is crap, the league needs this kind of story more than it needs an endless barrage of trite nonsense about what a great GM burke is and where sundin will land. i say bring on the controversy and bring on the avery, it will make for more intense games and more interesting stories.

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#3 doritogrande
December 02 2008, 05:34PM
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I have two trains of thought on this situation.

A) The NHL did the right thing to suspend Avery. His comments should not be welcome in the NHL. They belong in some Texas-area trailer park.

B) I wish Todd Bertuzzi was able to have some fun with him.

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#4 Wanye Gretz
December 02 2008, 05:38PM
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The league? Avery has more problems than that. Someone is going to put his head up his butt and roll him down the street like a wheel

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#5 Clarkenstein
December 02 2008, 05:43PM
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Joey Moss I hope you said that with your tongue firmly planted in your cheek, otherwise I've been giving your opinions more credibility than I should have. This kind of B.S. has no place in no league or no sport nowhere period!!

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#6 MSG
December 02 2008, 05:46PM
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Even as an Edmontonian I want to see Dion Phaneuf beat the sh1t out of Avery for that comment.

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#7 Ender the Dragon
December 02 2008, 05:59PM
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I would suggest that Sean Avery has bigger problems than getting pummelled for 30 seconds at center ice. I just looked up the numbers. Dion Phaneuf, while not making Sundin money quite yet, is still pulling in just shy of a cool $1M per season, not counting endorsements. I don't know about you, but I've never thought of insulting the girlfriend of a testosterone-fueled multi-millioniare as a particularly safe, intelligent, or even rational pastime. Avery is reported to be making $3.5M this season; if I were him, I'd invest most of that in a full-time live-in bodyguard, starting today.

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#8 misfit
December 02 2008, 06:05PM
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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand now he's been suspended by the NHL for that comment.

I thought the comment was pretty funny (100% because of who it was directed at), but a suspension?! That's pretty weak.

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#9 Hockey Gods
December 02 2008, 06:13PM
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I think it's funny, I wanted to see it dealt with on the ice rather than in the NHL boardroom.

A press conferance may not have been the right forum this, maybe he should have said it on the ice where it's tougher for the NHL to police it. But it is funny, I mean who hear can't say they enjoyed beaking off the other team while they played minor/beer league hockey. This would have brought the NHL valuable ratings if he played tonight... yet I am kind of relieved he isn't an Oiler.

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#10 Ender the Dragon
December 02 2008, 06:14PM
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The comment was way over the line. If Avery wanted to invite trouble, he just needed to say something like 'Hey, Dion, say hi to my girl,' or something like that. The league would have looked the other way, the Calgary Flames would have spent the entire 60 minutes playing shorthanded, and Avery would have left the game on a stretcher. But Avery the Unclassy had to go and lace the comment with ugly sexual overtones; of course, the league now has its image to worry about and had to respond the way they did. 12-year olds follow hockey too, and they know exactly what Avery meant. The league is telling those kids 'We have role models for you in this league, but Sean Avery is not one of them.'

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#11 Wanye Gretz
December 02 2008, 06:21PM
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Watching Bob Mackenzie talk about this is almost as fun. You get the impression you could talk to Bob any way you please and all he will do is go home and put on Tony Bennett and kick his dog.

What a nerd. Barnaby on the other hand - and the same panel - said it best. "This is best left on the ice, not on TV. He has played his last game as a Dallas Star."

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#12 1011011
December 02 2008, 06:22PM
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TSN is full of wimpy puff balls

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#13 Travis Dakin
December 02 2008, 06:22PM
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Seriously though, This is AWESOME! You have to seriously admire the Balls this guy has. To say those things about Iginla earlier and then drop that bomb on Phaneuf.... Oh my god that is awesome. NO fear man. Gotta love it.

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#14 Ender the Dragon
December 02 2008, 06:27PM
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There's a fine line between swagger and stupidity. In the words of Joey Tribbiani:

Over the line?! You-you're-you're so far past the line, that you-you can't even see the line! The line is a dot to you!

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#15 David S
December 02 2008, 06:27PM
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My guess is that Avery got suspended for holding a press conference specifically to prove to everybody how big of a dick he is. What's said on the ice is one thing, but when you do it in front of the media, that's clearly crossing the line.

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#16 Deep Oil
December 02 2008, 06:33PM
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Phaneuf is guilty of breaking the code and opened himself to this - Hicks is backing Bettman when he should be backing Brett Hull and his signing.

Avery made no comments that used profanity or racism.

I would rather have Cuthberts BFF Paris Hilton - better video.

NHL had a promo opportunity and put it's head in the sand to avoid a Steve Moore incident - to which will be settled out of court to avoid public embarrassment.

Shame on the NHL for not allowing free speech - but come to think of it you don't have free speech in Rexall as a fan either - any signs that are anti LOWE must be removed, if you are pregnant - you cannot place #25 on your belly, no breasts being exposed to the jumbotron, and if you are asked for ID for no legal reason other than to violate your rights - you can be banned just like the St. Albert lawyer last year - bottom line is both the NHL and the OILERS are the THOUGHT POLICE controlling every action to achieve VANILLA.

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#17 Deans
December 02 2008, 06:54PM
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Well at least Avery has a future being a great heel in the WWE.

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#18 Smokin' Ray
December 02 2008, 06:59PM
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Damn. I wanted to see him play tonight. Did I just say that I wanted to see a Flames game? Damn. Sorry.

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#19 The Towel Boy
December 02 2008, 07:28PM
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He's such a classless ass-clown. It's ridiculous. Always has been.

The sad part is that he's sitting in his hotel room right now revelling in this media/p.r. shitstorm he's created and loving every second of it. The dude's off his rocker.

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#20 b-rad
December 02 2008, 07:44PM
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Until now, I wasn't sure who I hated more, Avery or Phaneuf.....it was neck and neck...but Avery just pulled out into the lead.

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#21 Abdullah The Butcher
December 02 2008, 07:45PM
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The only thing that surprises me is the Dallas reaction.

Brett Hull signed the guy. You remember, Brett Hull, he of the soft spoken ilk.

The real question is why Avery did this. Is it because he is still p****d off that Cuthbert dumped him for that Brad Pitt lookalike Dion Phaneuf or was it just a mind f*** to get Phaneuf off his game?

Brilliant tactician Sean Avery is isn't he?

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#22 kingsblade
December 02 2008, 08:13PM
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I find myself wondering why everyone thinks Phaneuf is such a good fighter.

I don't know how many of you saw him play in junior, but I have never seen a player more likely to start trouble and then run and hide. He still does the same thing now, running around crashing into people with his visor front and center. Why does anyone think a guy is tough who lost fights to Getzlaf and Penner? Both big guys but clearly not fighters.

He gets this reputation because he is big and hits big, but anyone who picks fights in a visor is a joke, and I would not even bet against Avery in that fight.

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#23 kingsblade
December 02 2008, 08:19PM
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v71FqkDMV1c&feature=related

A personal favorite

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#24 oilboy76
December 02 2008, 08:23PM
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He's a dead man! Dion is gonna beat him like a red headed step child, the next time these two teams meet! that is if unsAVERY still has a job in the NHL. Even his teamates are fed up with the act! Hull cant be feelin to good about his big off season singing!

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#25 kingsblade
December 02 2008, 08:32PM
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Sorry to triple post here, (how embarrassing) but I also wanted to point out what happens when Phaneuf actually does remove his visor.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pm32NEKoJ_w

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#26 WrathOfTheJenati
December 02 2008, 08:40PM
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Let's start by saying I hate Sean Avery. But the NHL suspending the guy for this makes it seem like there run by 14 year old girls...After all you wouldn't want anyone's feelings to get hurt. I think the should have let Phaneuf deal with it...although Avery would most likely just cry for the ref.

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#27 ThoughtPolice
December 02 2008, 08:40PM
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I can't believe that they suspended Avery over this of all things. Everyone is applauding this decision but it was made at completely the wrong time IMO. Why not punish him for his racial slurs against Georges and Gauthier? things he said to Tucker? And numerous other altercations?

His comment today was harmless only meant to rile up Phaneuf and his ex. I agree it wasn't smart to say or kind but since when do we censor people for speaking their mind when the speech is clean?....since today in the NHL i guess.

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#28 1011011
December 02 2008, 08:40PM
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Triple post away kingsblade. That second video is great.

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#29 jeanshorts
December 02 2008, 09:28PM
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I have always hated Sean Avery and the fact that most, if not all of his team, and his GM hate him just as much as everyone else in the league makes me giddy. And lets be honest, the only reason he's still in the league is because he's good at pissing off every single person around him. Because the dude doesn't hit, doesn't fight, he can barely handle the puck and he's a career third liner at best.

But I think it's ridiculous that the league suspended him for making fun of no one in particular. Sure you know it was aimed at Shrek, but he didn't come right out and trash him personally. If that kind of thing warrents a suspension then god forbid the league gets anywhere within hearing distance of the ice during a game, because you know that the stuff that comes out in the coarse of a game is 20 times worse. Let the players police themselves, and you won't get Sean Avery's running their mouths without fear of retaliation.

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#30 oilboy76
December 02 2008, 09:29PM
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Thoughtpopo,

I see what your saying, and I think if this was an isolated incident(ie:not someone like Avery who's always running on like a soup sandwich) it would of been dismissed as being an ignorant and rude remark.I think the NHL is just trying to keep unsAvery from turning our game into a spin off of wwe or stampede wrestling!

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#31 Tim S
December 02 2008, 09:37PM
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The real story in all of this is how Avery's teammates and owner have reacted. Turco sounded pissed off, Richards sounded tired of it, Barnaby said he has spoken with guys on the stars that can't stand him. This has blown up in Hull's face and he should have been the one to deal with it early on and I think it will cost him his job as co-GM.

As for Phanuef not being a very good fighter, he is a devastating hitter and despite the fact he seems like a dick you know his teammates would have been looking to help him out putting a hurt on Avery.

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#32 chrissy
December 02 2008, 10:43PM
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I don't know why anyone is surprised or feigning outrage at the fact that Avery was suspended. This isn't the WWE or UFC, this is a national sporting league. I doubt the NFL/NBA/MLB would react any differently.

If he says this on the ice, there's obviously no suspension, but to summon the media and rehearse some stupid bit about sloppy seconds is just pathetic. If he says this type of shit on camera, I bet everything he's been accused of is true (Laraque, Blake, etc.). This guy has no filter between his head and his ass.

Oh and Sean, Rod Stewart says takes one to know one buddy.

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#33 g
December 02 2008, 11:17PM
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i love that everyone is looking out for dion 'cause avery made fun of his girlfriend...bottom line: Cuthbert will go through at least 3 more athletes before she marries a b-list actor 8 yrs. from now. Phaneuf will still be the wanker that blocks shots in warmup and wears underarmor to the bar.

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#34 g
December 02 2008, 11:18PM
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go oil!

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#35 doritogrande
December 02 2008, 11:20PM
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"Avery made no comments that used profanity or racism.

I would rather have Cuthberts BFF Paris Hilton - better video.

NHL had a promo opportunity and put it’s head in the sand to avoid a Steve Moore incident - to which will be settled out of court to avoid public embarrassment.

Shame on the NHL for not allowing free speech - but come to think of it you don’t have free speech in Rexall as a fan either - any signs that are anti LOWE must be removed, if you are pregnant - you cannot place #25 on your belly, no breasts being exposed to the jumbotron, and if you are asked for ID for no legal reason other than to violate your rights - you can be banned just like the St. Albert lawyer last year - bottom line is both the NHL and the OILERS are the THOUGHT POLICE controlling every action to achieve VANILLA."

It was the entire thought process that did him in. Maybe you should check out the video of the comment before you rush to judgement. He called the cameras over and spouted off. It was pre-meditated. He knew exactly what he was going to say, and what it would do.

And yes, the NHL wants to avoid another Steve Moore incident. Are you pro-career ending injuries? This is a business, as are all sports leagues. The NHL is in danger of losing money and you think a stunt such as this will bring good press? I'm sorry, but you're out to lunch. If you want to watch morons mouthing off and concussions from being driven down from behind, go watch MMA.

Shame on the NHL for not respecting free speech? After the crap he's spewed in the past, does he deserve it? Keep in mind he's not a first time offender. As has been previously stated, he's made comments about Laraque and Gauthier, and don't forget about his comments about Iginla, one of the 10 best players in this league, and I'm glad he was censored.

Stars management is pissed and rightfully so. If you were the owner of a company would you want to employ staff that can't control their mouths? I wouldn't. Sean Avery is a pestilence to the NHL, and deserves anything coming to him.

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#36 kingsblade
December 02 2008, 11:42PM
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Tim S Says:

"As for Phanuef not being a very good fighter, he is a devastating hitter and despite the fact he seems like a dick you know his teammates would have been looking to help him out putting a hurt on Avery."

First, He does lay some people out from time to time but usually goes out of position to do so. In other words he is looking for the glory of the hit more than doing his job. Anyone can do that, which you can see easily by checking out the video of Daniel Cleary knocking Phaneuf halfway senseless.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgeDlYSxLmQ

Second, I don't think anyone on his team likes him either. I know for a fact that at ther every least a sizeable number of them don't. The rest of the organization knows it too because in training camp some players were asked if they would please not fight him "even though he's an ass," because he has become important to team marketing.

Anyways...in this situation I agree that Avery deserves a beating, but I grow weary of the undeserved reputation of Phaneuf.

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#37 Antony Ta
December 03 2008, 12:54AM
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The NHL is a bunch of metrosexual ball-grabbing pansies. Let Dion beat the crap out of him, don't pull this crap with the suspending him over saying something the media should have censored anyway.

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#38 DJ Spyn Cycle
December 03 2008, 08:00AM
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Media? Censor? Nooooooooooooo.

Avery said something really dumb, he should be held to account. These are hockey players not retarded heiresses with their own reality show. Some decorum and respect shouldn't be too much to ask.

I hope he gets the shit kicked out of him.

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#39 kris
December 03 2008, 08:52AM
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As crass as Avery is, its not like he was telling a lie...

This has been blown way out of proportion, look at some of the stuff NFL players get away with...

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#40 Tim S
December 03 2008, 09:09AM
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kingsblade; I am not saying that his hits = great defensive play but he does hit hard. And in the game last night there is no doubt that Phanuef would have had ample opportunites to run Avery even if it meant taking himself out of position.

While I have no doubt alot of flames dislike Phaneuf, the fact is he is a good player and for that he would have the respect of his teammates which is alot more then Avery can say right now.

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#41 bcjamwa
December 03 2008, 09:13AM
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With that comment, and his earlier diss of Iginla, I think Bettman should've punished him by MAKING him play against Calgary.

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#42 Kevin
December 03 2008, 09:29AM
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Classless comment by a classless guy. Time to grow up Sean - this is getting tiring. People like him make a complete mockery of sports.

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#43 swany
December 03 2008, 09:47AM
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I thought the comments were funny myself, but I have 2 boys that watch TSN and Sportsnet. Those comments are NOT something I want my 10 year old and 7 year old hearing. Sloppy seconds how in the hell do you explain what the means, AND why he said it.

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#44 milli
December 03 2008, 10:02AM
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Funniest thing I ever heard. I couldn't wait for puck drop....then, I heard he had been suspended???? For what? Saying sloppy seconds? You get suspended for that now? What, is this minor hockey? In the NFL, you gotta shoot someone....in hockey....girlfriends are off limits? CRAZY!!!! I hope Tambo trades for him.

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#45 pdan
December 03 2008, 10:26AM
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You guys defending Avery are idiots. If you had kids you wouldn't be supporting these comments on TV. Travis Dakin, Milli. You guys are the assclowns for supporting Avery.

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#46 Antony Ta
December 03 2008, 11:34AM
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holding a press conference

The media go to him for quotes, he doesn't go looking for the media.

You guys defending Avery are idiots. If you had kids you wouldn’t be supporting these comments on TV. Travis Dakin, Milli. You guys are the assclowns for supporting Avery.

Hey, Avery doesn't decide what makes it onto prime time television. TSN does.

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#47 milli
December 03 2008, 11:58AM
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hey pdan....you're a p-douche (and dude, I got kids, but I raise them, not TSN, not sportsnet....but man, what kinda shit do you think is on the internet?). Why on earth would that warrant a suspension? Is Avery a clown...ya, but does he get under people's skin? ya. So, he got suspended for saying "sloppy seconds". Is MacT gonna get suspended for fighting fans? I bet that Douche bag bettman cost himself like a million viewers.

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#48 Travis Dakin
December 03 2008, 12:38PM
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pdan- Get off your high horse. Holy man its babies like you in the world that are contributing to the continued pussification of the north american culture. (thanks Mr. Carlin) For the record, I do have a kid. And I do raise her and hopefully I can teach her about how guys disrespect girls when they are of the more promiscuous kind like Avery did. And, if I was Phaneuf, you're damn right I'd be pissed. THAT WAS THE POINT! But it's funny. It is called entertainment. That's what these guys are paid Millions of dollars to do. Entertain us by playing a GAME. I personally would not have said something like that but I do admire the fact that he would say something like that knowing full well that he would have to face retribution on the ice that night. He is getting in the head of his apponent, all the while ENTERTAINING the hell out of me.

But that's ok, you can hop right on that media band wagon and piss and moan about him all you want. Me, I will continue to think for myself, form an opinion of my own and keep enjoying the ride. It's way more fun.

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#49 pdan
December 03 2008, 12:53PM
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Travis, go back to your trailer and watch WWE. That's the sort of entertainment you're talking about, with the pre-game rants/insults. Class level is way down because of players like Avery and fans like you. I like rough and tough hockey, but mouth breathers like you we could do without.

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#50 Hockey Gods
December 03 2008, 01:08PM
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I find it funny how the media condems Avery for what he said, yet if a media outlet were chatsized for something they said they would claim 4th ammendment and dispute the freedom of speech act.

Fact is he never named names, he made an insinuation that took balls, and was willing to face the consequences. Sure it was a poor place and time to do it, but if he said it on the ice no one would know any different.

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