May 12 2008 01:01PM
So the Colorado Avalanche and Uncle Joel Quenneville have “mutually agreed to part ways” on Friday.
We love it when people “mutually agree” to part ways. We had this girlfriend once with whom we wanted to break up.
“Listen babe,” we said, “this just ain’t workin’ out for us. You gots to GO.”
Later on we found out she’d been going around telling everyone the break up was “mutual.” So mutually parting ways is code for “one party dumped the other one off at the curb with the daily trash, and that party is too thick, too proud or too clueless to understand what happened.”
The Avs released a statement saying that “After meeting with Joel, we mutually agreed that the best decision for both parties involved is to go separate ways" Translation: Listen babe, you gots to GO.
Anyways, Quenneville had a record of 131-92-23 record in his three seasons in Denver, and was forced to mutually agree with Avalanche brass to get out as fast as he could. How does that stack up with our own Craig MacTavish, entering his eighth season as Oilers head coach? Well, over the same time period, MacT has a record of 114-106-26. So 17 fewer wins, one fewer playoff birth and no concerns for job security on the horizon. That sounds about right doesn’t it?
That got us thinking about Quenneville’s twin brother, former Oilers coach Ron Low. They both had the same stressed out look, both rocked a luxurious moustache to the max, and both were fired as NHL coaches. In Ron Low's last three years— all of which the Oil made the playoffs we might add—his combined record was 106-111-31. So Ron Low makes the playoffs three years in a row, collects eight fewer wins in a non-shoot-out world over three seasons, grows one hell of a moustache and gets gassed. Quenneville makes the playoffs two out of three years, wins 131 games, grows one hell of a moustache and is shown the door.
As far as we can tell the only thing keeping MacT from being fired is his lack of a moustache. Something to think about when thinking of how to update your look, MacT.
Impact on the league
As expected, every single move in the NHL is being interpreted as beneficial to the Maple Leafs and their hunt to find a coach/GM/scoring forward/good goalie/leadership/ushers at Air Canada Centre.
I suppose we can throw his name on a growing list of potential coaching candidates. Perhaps this opens the door for Patrick Roy to become coach of the Avalanche. We know we were impressed with his work at the Ramparts, which included nearly fighting a coach, and encouraging his 11th-string goalie son to lay a beating on a defenceless opposing ‘tender. Sounds ready to coach in the NHL to us.