Sidney Crosby shaves rat off face

Wanye
May 27 2008 11:18AM

theshave.jpg 

The Penguins are having a live press conference right now on their website featuring a cranky and clean-shaven Sidney Crosby trying to explain why he and his team are down 2–0 and haven’t scored a goal since PJ Stock became an analyst on CBC.

The burning question in our minds is has Crosby shaved the “beard” off his face because:

  1. A third grader can grow a better beard,
  2. He has given up on the playoffs altogether,
  3. Mario said to him “Listen you little sh*t, I didn’t rock a beard for one period of my career and I won two Cups. Shave that crap off your face and win me a game or you aren’t coming out of my basement till fall,”
  4. All of the above.
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#1 Ed
May 27 2008, 11:33AM
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I'll go with #1 that thing was pitiful

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#2 Rick
May 27 2008, 11:49AM
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I think it finally dawned on him that his beard was the reason the ref's weren't taking hims seriously when he was whining to them.

The realization finally set in when Marc Joanette pulled a tissue out of his pocket, spit on it and tried to wipe the dirt off of Crosby's chin while Brad Watson was laughing his ass off hysterically.

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#3 1011011
May 27 2008, 12:42PM
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This is compelling journalism at its best. Good job Wanye you sharp shooter

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#4 1011011
May 27 2008, 03:10PM
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PS I was being sarcastic

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#5 olderthendirt
May 27 2008, 04:30PM
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It seems easy to me, cann't grow a bread, he cann't win the cup.

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#6 erixon
May 28 2008, 10:03AM
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I think he was in fear of being deported, as he looked far too much like a filthy puerto rican gardener.

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#7 Quain
May 28 2008, 11:22AM
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Yes. America has a habit of deporting Puerto Ricans. Goddamn illegals!

... wait a minute.

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#8 Tom
May 28 2008, 12:56PM
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Personally I hope it was #3. The Golden Boy needs a good kick in the pants.

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#9 Tony Romo
May 28 2008, 01:21PM
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I hear that Tom. I am sick of his holier than thou ways.

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#10 Milli
May 28 2008, 05:17PM
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#4, and maybe he should jointhe beard club for BOYS!!!!

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#11 Hoos
May 29 2008, 12:39AM
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I'm writing this after the game and at this time I'm reminded of a Simpsons' episode quotation (with some relevant alterations:

Chef: Come here [Crosby], you don't want to sit with the rest of this scum.

Crowd: Hey, what, hey ...!

Chef: I only consider you scum in comparison to [Crosby].

Crowd: Oh yeah ... okay then.

Chef: Yeah, you see how you scum.

Crosby, no longer scum.

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#12 CrosbyGirl87
June 07 2008, 12:42PM
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How about neither? You all are just being mean because you all know that he is one of the best players out there in the NHL. Who cares if he shaved or not, the Penguins went far, further than the Oilers.

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