July 11 2008 07:46AM
You may notice that there are a couple minor changes to the Nation, and that it’s been acting a little funny for the past day or so. Well aren’t you observant! Here, we have a present for you!
Yup, we’ve been making some changes around here, lambs. We’ve added a countdown to the new season and we fixed some stuff that was broken. We’ve transferred the site to a new server that can handle more capacity, and have begun building a laundry list of new things to add to the site. We also mowed the lawn and finally got that smell out of the basement.
You may be asking yourself, "Why? Why change things? Why fix things that are broken? Why not live in broken crap forever like a mountain hillbilly?”
Well, the answer is you, Nation. You have seriously shocked the living hell out of us with how busy the site is, so while you’re out having fun this summer we have dedicated ourselves to rebuilding and improving the site. The OilersNation is one of the busiest independent hockey sites around that isn’t called TSN, SportsNet or EdmontonOilers.com! We’re busier than Brittney Spears’ dealer in 2007! We’re busier than Amy Winehouse’s dealer July 2008! It’s getting that real!
In celebration, we have a bunch of awesome new stuff coming for the fall, and a pair of new writers that will shock and surprise you with their celebrity and awesomeness. And for the 2008/09 season we guarantee:
- 59% more swears!
- 115% more nudity!
- 627% more human trafficking!
Really, though, there’s some serious hotness coming that the whole team is pumped to bring to you party people. We would like to thank all of you for continuing to come here and share in our hot, freshly baked articles.
Thanks to Robin Brownlee for continuing to grace us with his presence, and making us a real website. Thanks to Pimp Daddy Eldon and the Fastest Slopitch in the West for all their work on the site. We would also like to thank MSG for always texting us the breaking news so we can continue to be first to bringing you the latest gossip. And lastly we would like to thank Spyn Cycle for holding it all together.
We haven’t made a speech like that since we won the 1993 Adult Movie Award for Forrest Humps! It takes us back to the good old days.
Lord Wanye Von Gretzelstein III Amateur computer programmer and nude model