'Worst. OTR. Ever.' or 'Ray Emery: confirmed douche'

Wanye
July 15 2008 09:49AM

OK, we admit we normally don’t watch Off The Record with Michael Landsberg. We don’t have much interest in watching a third-string CFL referee get interviewed, or a former WWE wrestler discuss his off-season training regimen. Normally, we’d rather watch a Jon and Kate Plus Eight marathon on A&E than give Landsberg 20 seconds of our precious time.

But as we surfed passed yesterday with the old remote-control device, we saw Ray Emery, disgraced Sens goalie, has gone to play in the Russian Continental League. It starts off with Emery smirking as he introduces himself as being part of Atlant Mytishchi or whatever the name of the team is. The fact he laughs as he tries to remember the team that has signed him shows the level of commitment this douchebag will bring and how terrible this interview will be.

Credit to Landsberg for even asking the tough questions—it was pretty classic seeing the look on Emery’s face when Landsberg asked him if he had a drug problem. Reply: A smirking “no.” Landsberg asked him if partying affects his play. Reply: A smirking “no.” Landsberg asked him why he’s so late for team events. Reply: A smirking “I guess I’m not good at showing up on time.”

We’ve seen some arrogant douchebags in our day, particularly when we attended the 2002 World Douchebag Championships in Sweden. Emery upsets the apple cart on a winning team and asks for a trade, and he was shut down. Then in the off-season he got his wish: the Sens tried and shop him around he was passed on by all 30 NHL teams, including LA who will basically trade or sign anyone with a pulse. Then he was bought out of a three-year contract. Yup, plenty here to look back on with pride and say “I have earned the right to act like a complete ass.”

For the entire eight-minute interview, we were cheering for Lansberg to decide aloud “Hey, this guy isn’t in the NHL anymore. This is one of the worst interviews I have ever had,” and then lean over and smack the 15-carat rings out of Emery's ears.

Emeryan-type attitudes might fly in the NBA, NFL or some American NHL teams, but you’re playing hockey, Ray. In Canada. Home of broken teeth, broken noses and a “put me in the game, coach” attitude. You seem to fit in like Michael Jackson at an elementary school Christmas Play. Not wanted, not welcome. But for some reason: moonwalking.

Among the gems from Emery:

“It wasn’t my fault we were losing games.” “Hindsight is 20/20 I shouldn’t have done some of those things. But I’m not losing any sleep over it.” “I have a problem showing up on time... I guess.”

If you’re wondering, nothing has ever been Ray Emery’s fault. Nothing will ever be Emery’s fault and he’s apparently happy to be shipped to Russia. Asked why he didn’t try and find a job in the NHL: “I would rather not play in the NHL at a tenth the pay.”

OK Ray, you get your wish. Get the hell out of here you limp-wristed little bitch.

You can watch the whole interview here.

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#1 RobinB
July 15 2008, 11:33AM
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Wanye: Don't be so quick to dismiss Jon ande Kate Plus Eight. Having been forced into seeking new programs since the, ahem, unfortunate circumstances leading to Dog Chapman's demise, I gave J&K+8 a try and I must say I was very surprised at the depth of the storylines and the development of characters from week to week. It's got Hogan Knows Best beat hands down. You should give it a try. When is the J&K+8 marathon?

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#2 1011011
July 15 2008, 11:39AM
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Im going to side with Robin on this one too Wanye. JK+8 is actually a great show. Ray Emery is junk, like he could raise 8 kids or keep a fox like Kate happy. As if!

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#3 RobinB
July 15 2008, 11:46AM
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1011011: Waye is to SMART for J&K+8. He's too COOL for J&K+8. He's too busy tooling around in his van to watch J&K+8. Posers hanging out at the Tin Palace like Wanye don't have time for J&K+8. LLLLLLoser!

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#4 Chad P
July 15 2008, 11:59AM
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Hey I work at Earls, don't bring us into this!

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#5 cgrey
July 15 2008, 12:00PM
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After watching that interview, its pretty clear why this guy couldn't land a job in the NHL. And way to exemplify the stereotype of all goalies having sawdust for brains.

JK+8 has nothing on Shear Genius!

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#6 DJ Spyn Cycle
July 15 2008, 12:56PM
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If you numbskulls are going to argue about the best reality TV, at least watch a network that's half-way decent... like FoodTV. It's called Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares, fools!

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#7 RobinB
July 15 2008, 01:02PM
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BJ: Nice of you to chime in before setting off on your annual July tour of bathhouses in the Bay Area. Shaddup.

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#8 sean
July 15 2008, 02:02PM
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As posted on the Oiler Web Site- Stortini has signed a three year deal.

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#9 MacGruber
July 15 2008, 02:20PM
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Watching the interview now, and in the first few minutes and Emery seems pretty humble.

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#10 DJ Spyn Cycle
July 15 2008, 02:29PM
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Robin, I don't do that tour anymore, since you were kind enough to point out all the ones in Edmonton to me.

ANYWAY: Ramsey. Nuff said.

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#11 David S
July 15 2008, 05:55PM
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Emery should have said the whole perception thing was Corey and Trevor's fault. That always seems to work.

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#12 Pat
July 15 2008, 11:02PM
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"Emery should have said the whole perception thing was Corey and Trevor’s fault. That always seems to work."

That's hilarious, David S. That was precisely my thought after reading Wanye's post. I kept thinking of how Ricky avoids any sort of responsibility for anything that goes wrong.

So...does all of this mean that Emery is a "shit leopard who can't change his spots"?

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#13 Milli
July 16 2008, 09:29AM
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haha, the shit apple don't fall far from the shit tree!!!! The russians are gonna just love this guy!!! Just try and keep him outta the wodka, just try!!

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#14 Wanye Gretz
July 16 2008, 11:42AM
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"It's called a shitticane Randy, its a hurricane of shit and its blowing right this way."

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#15 David S
July 16 2008, 11:40PM
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"Looks like we're in the middle of a shit typhoon so we'd better haul in the jib before it gets covered in shit."

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#16 Pat
July 17 2008, 05:04PM
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"When you plant shitseeds you get shitweeds."

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