Who or what is Gilbert Brule?

Wanye
August 06 2008 03:47PM

Remember Raffi Torres? Remember when he was traded to Columbus for Gilbert “Crème” Brule? Rich, soft and sweet, just like the dessert. Who the hell is that guy, anyway? Oh, you know stuff about him? Shut up. How does that sound? Good.

Our knowledge of Brule consists of the following story. One time we went on a road trip and someone picked Brule as their person in the game "20 questions." How preposterous is that? “Who the hell is Gibert Brule?” was the question we were asking that day. And later—when we had hit question 21 and lost the game—we were cursing his very name and existence.

Fast-forward four years. A little more chest hair, a little less swagger in his step, but we can’t help but wonder if we still hate Brule after all the time that has passed. Should we consider him to be a fragile little deer, healing from injury and only three years removed from being compared to Sidney Crosby? Or should we run him over with a stolen car the instant he reports to training camp and finish him off for good? All good questions. And dammit questions need answers!

So peep this, Nation. Four sections, four days and if all goes well we should shed some light on the enigma wrapped in a mystery dipped in the UFO sighting that is Gibert Brule. And as a special bonus, it is going to be a collaboration between Jonathan Willis and Fleet Admiral Wanye Gretz in what could be possibly the first shared post in the history of the notoriously combative Oilogosphere*. There will be tears and fights, believe that!

In advance: You’re welcome.

*We're certain one of you will point out that this is not so. Please provide links and footnotes detailing our error. We are so. Very. Lazy.

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#1 RobinB
August 06 2008, 10:16PM
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Part II: Are you analyzing Brule based on seeing him play, talking to his coaches, teammates and opponents or are you analyzing his numbers bolstered by 45-second YouTube clips?

Part IV: The future. Do tell. And pass along your findings to Scott Howson so he'll know what he's given up to get 35 good games a season from Raffi.

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#2 Wanye Gretz
August 06 2008, 10:58PM
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As a matter of fact Robin we do have a youtube video. It has "get ready for this" as the background music by 90s supergroup 2Unlimited. I think you will enjoy it.

Oh and the future? You will enjoy that too. Jonathan and I travel one year and 5 months into the future and attend an Oilers game to see how Brule ends up. During the intermission at the game we call you and wish you a happy 115th birthday.

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#3 Jonathan
August 07 2008, 08:39AM
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Jonathan and I travel one year and 5 months into the future and attend an Oilers game to see how Brule ends up.

Not to give too much away, but there's already a statue of Steve Tambellini in front of Rexall at that point.

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#4 The Towel Boy
August 07 2008, 10:05AM
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...I just care about one thing...are there flying cars in the future?

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#5 Milli
August 07 2008, 10:37AM
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I can't wait to see the future!!!

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#6 Doogie2K
August 08 2008, 11:34AM
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I just care about one thing…are there flying cars in the future?

Of course there are, silly. That's how you know it's the future!

/Robert Zemeckis

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