GDB 51: Has the world gone crazy?

bingofuel
February 05 2009 03:06PM

klingon

Well, loyal Nation readers, things don’t feel so hot here in Oil City, or really anywhere on this spinning ball of rock. Our boys in copper and blue play St Louis tonight. But they do so without Lubomir Visnovsky, who’s been placed on the IR list.

Meanwhile, Dustin Penner won’t complete (or even start) any checks, Sheldon Souray’s upset because he can’t find a decent hair jelly to maintain his quaff, Daryl Katz astonishingly owns the Cracker Cats now, and nerds are dressing up like Klingons and robbing the good citizens of the Federation down in the US.

What’s next? Zebras and Lions hugging? Fans NOT demanding MacT’s head on a platter? Brownlee cracking a smile? Amber McCormick finally agreeing to go on a date with me? My gods, what a terrifying world this place is becoming! Someone hit me in the face with a shovel, please.

So even though things are dire in the Nation right now, I’m going to predict a hard-fought Oilers win tonight. Sure, I know sweet tweet about hockey compared to Wanye Gretz and Robin Brownlee, but I know what my guts tell me: “Eat something, bingofuel. Something greasy. Good. Now type ‘Oilers will win tonight 3-2’.”

Oilers will win tonight 3-2.

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Bingofuel is the handsome cyborg who pulls all the levers behind the curtains of the OilersNation. When he isn't running the site, he's plugged into a wall socket, recharging. Or Brownlee and Wanye are playing "keep away" with him. He gets little to no respect.
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#1 CurtisS
February 05 2009, 03:13PM
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5-4 Blues win.

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#2 Jack "slacking off at work" Bauer
February 05 2009, 03:16PM
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9-4 Blues, hat trick by Winchester

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#3 Chris
February 05 2009, 03:19PM
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2-1 Oil. I will fall asleep on the couch...again.

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#4 Librarian Mike
February 05 2009, 03:24PM
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4-0 Blues. Souray gets a game misconduct for taking his skate off and trying to stab Tkachuk with it, and MacT gives Reddox a hug at centre ice after the game.

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#5 Bruthah
February 05 2009, 03:24PM
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Librarian Mike wrote:

4-0 Blues. Souray gets a game misconduct for taking his skate off and trying to stab Tkachuk with it, and MacT gives Reddox a hug at centre ice after the game.

LOL

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#6 Chaz
February 05 2009, 03:25PM
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Maybe the Oil should use the fact that TSN isn't even bothering to give them an "Ice Chips" segment on their website as motivation for tonight. You hear that Oilers? Nobody outside of Oiler Nation cares about your lack-luster team. Not go out there and make them notice you! Or not.

Oilers 4 Blues 2.

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#7 bingofuel
February 05 2009, 03:26PM
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@ Librarian Mike: If that actually happens, I think I'll be OK with a 4-0 loss.

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#8 FS
February 05 2009, 03:32PM
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Jussi Jokinen was placed on waviers today, would you pick him up? He was pretty good in Dallas.

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#9 The Towel Boy
February 05 2009, 03:36PM
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Monday Guy told me that he predicts a Gagner hat trick tonight...and I replied by telling him that every time he predicts a Gagner hat trick...we lose - badly. He still insists it's gonna happen.

So there you have it...blame Monday Guy.

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#10 The Towel Boy
February 05 2009, 03:38PM
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FS wrote:

Jussi Jokinen was placed on waviers today, would you pick him up? He was pretty good in Dallas.

Maaayybe...he's money in the shootout. ..I dunno much about him other than that.

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#11 bingofuel
February 05 2009, 03:39PM
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@ FS: Yeah, but Jokinen's not been awesome in Tampa Bay. He's been fighting a knee injury, has no goals in 30 games, and he's been placed on waivers twice. Before that he had 6 goals in 16 games... I don't know if he's worth the risk.

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#12 cambosmash
February 05 2009, 03:40PM
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Jussi 'The Bad' Jokinen is an undersized, defensive liability of a forward that coasts through games and rocks the shootout. I think there's enough of those guys around. At least he wins faceoffs slightly more often than 50% of the time.

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#13 shakey
February 05 2009, 03:45PM
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I'm so excited to see Penner back on the 1st line. He really must have learned his lesson and gained a new respect for the game with that ONE WHOLE GAME on the 4th line. That is some solid coaching.

Tuesday...you suck fatty, your commitment level is low and you aren't playing with any 'Jam'.

Thursday...he's really the best fit on the top line. "We all know and agree Dustin is the best fit there when he's playing," said MacTavish. "Plus, he can ride shotgun with Hemmer if they're taking liberties with him."

Penner can ride shotgun with Hemmer if they take liberties? Really? Is that same as 'stand and watch him get drilled into the ice', cause if it is then I agree.

Don't worry Dusty...by Saturday you could be in the press box watching the guy from the movie 'Powder' take your spot on the first line. He has lots of 'Jam'.

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#14 sittingatmydesk
February 05 2009, 03:45PM
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6-1 oilers...penner with hat-trick... NOT!!!

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#15 Amber
February 05 2009, 03:46PM
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Bingofuel wrote:

Amber McCormick finally agreeing to go on a date with me?

You just have to ask properly. Asking me by urinating "will you go out with me" on my front lawn, no matter how impressive, doesn't make a lady swoon.

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#16 The Towel Boy
February 05 2009, 03:49PM
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Amber wrote:

You just have to ask properly. Asking me by urinating “will you go out with me” on my front lawn, no matter how impressive, doesn’t make a lady swoon.

Woah, thanks for the heads up!

I'll stop drinking my big gulp now.

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#17 Monday Guy
February 05 2009, 03:52PM
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@ The Towel Boy: YOU SONOFABITCH !

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#18 Colin
February 05 2009, 03:53PM
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Amber wrote:

Bingofuel wrote: Amber McCormick finally agreeing to go on a date with me? You just have to ask properly. Asking me by urinating “will you go out with me” on my front lawn, no matter how impressive, doesn’t make a lady swoon.

That's right real men use defecation.

(wow did I just write that....the world is off today...)

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#19 Colin
February 05 2009, 03:54PM
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I'll step out on a limb and call a 4-1 score for the Oilers, if they win one of the next 3, it's this one, right??

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#20 Monday Guy
February 05 2009, 03:55PM
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I guess all that can save me now is an ACTUAL Gagner hat trick. Man, I'm gonna look like a King in the Morning

Muahahaaaaa

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#21 Poo Czar
February 05 2009, 03:55PM
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The Oil are kinda like having a favorite Uncle try and molest you. Not as a kid mind you, but as a full grown man. Growing up he was awesome, handing out Stanley cups, getting you drunk for the first time.

Then he tries to stick his wiener in your face twice in 42 days and occasionally exposes himself to you.

Sure, a lot of the time he’s still cool and treats you right, but you really don’t know what to expect any more when he’s coming over that night.

So who’s it gonna be tonight? Cool Uncle Larry with a 6 pack of Newcastle? Or Uncle Tickle?

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#22 bingofuel
February 05 2009, 03:57PM
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Amber wrote:

You just have to ask properly. Asking me by urinating “will you go out with me” on my front lawn, no matter how impressive, doesn’t make a lady swoon.

You said it was sexy! And then you threw an empty bottle at JD at my face.

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#23 Mike
February 05 2009, 03:58PM
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Colin wrote:

That’s right real men use defecation. (wow did I just write that….the world is off today…)

Are you sure your name isn't colon?

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#24 APE
February 05 2009, 04:07PM
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Someone beat up Backes tonite please.

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#25 CurtisS
February 05 2009, 04:08PM
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Oilers are 0-7 on Thursday nights this year

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#26 bingofuel
February 05 2009, 04:12PM
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CurtisS wrote:

Oilers are 0-7 on Thursday nights this year

True, but the Oil are also 2-0 against the Blues this season.

Optimism is the hallmark of a deluded Oilers fan, isn't it?

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#27 Jason Gregor
February 05 2009, 04:13PM
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Not a great stat for the Oilers...they are 0-7 on Thursday games so far this.

4-1 loss in Colorado 3-1 loss in Nashville 5-4 loss in Pittsburgh 5-2 loss v. Toronto 4-3 loss v. Detroit 2-0 loss v. Florida 5-1 loss in Minnesota

So you can look at say the odds are they will finally win on a Thursday, or continue to suck it on Thursdays. They did win in St.Louis earlier this year 4-2, so there is your positive nugget.

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#28 Jeremy
February 05 2009, 04:21PM
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LOL @ Poo Czar!!!! So far funniest comment of the day. And it's gonna be 3-1 Oilers. Souray, Hemmer and Brodz with the goals. Take that to the bank.

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#29 Bruthah
February 05 2009, 04:26PM
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Jeremy wrote:

LOL @ Poo Czar!!!! So far funniest comment of the day. And it’s gonna be 3-1 Oilers. Souray, Hemmer and Brodz with the goals. Take that to the bank.

Book it?

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#30 Amber McCormick
February 05 2009, 04:26PM
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bingofuel wrote:

You said it was sexy! And then you threw an empty bottle at JD at my face.

It was EMPTY!!!! Besides, I've never been a good shot- thought I'd miss

*that's what he said*

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#31 Dennis Castro
February 05 2009, 04:33PM
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Oilers win 5-2, 2 goals from Hemsky.

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#32 Xavier
February 05 2009, 04:37PM
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JSBM just posted their game day. Against St. Louis is was hilarious.

Justice League Uncensored? Wanye are these going hand in hand now?

http://www.jeanshortsandbaggedmilk.com

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#33 baggedmilk
February 05 2009, 04:40PM
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Anyone with a filthy mouth and the ability to multi task come join the Justice League uncensored at JSBM.

We're doing two here kiddies. One for the the hockey and one for the people that like F--- is the best word in the english language.

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#34 APE
February 05 2009, 04:41PM
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@ Dennis Castro: All 5?

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#35 baggedmilk
February 05 2009, 04:41PM
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Man losing Lubo is going to hurt. The guy is a beauty.

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#36 BRHL Commish
February 05 2009, 04:47PM
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The Oilers have played 2 cold games in a row, its time for a hot game. This team is so predictable it's pathetic. Any other market and Craptavish would have been fired long ago.

4-2 Oil, Reddox, Reasoner, and Peterson with 2

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#37 cremps
February 05 2009, 04:50PM
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maybe having a "Jussi" on our roster is what we're missing right now.

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#38 Dennis Castro
February 05 2009, 04:52PM
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@ APE: What do you mean "All 5?" I mean 2 goals from Hemsky of the 5 the Oilers score.

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#39 Dennis
February 05 2009, 05:03PM
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The 27-10-83 line due to go on a tear and 10 won't keep flubbing all these big time scoring opps so we've got that going for us. 51's also had a few scoring chances in the last couple of games so he's hitting the ball hard and one or two might fall in for him.

On the negative side, Roli's giving up a questionable goal a game and 13 looks totally lost. Plus, our best dman's on the shelf.

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#40 Jason Gregor
February 05 2009, 05:15PM
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MAP is scratched tonight...Looks like Reddox on 3rd line and Potulny on 4th...Penner back with 10 and 83, and 12-89-26.

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#41 Smokin' Ray
February 05 2009, 05:20PM
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GAME DAY!!!

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#42 Travis Dakin
February 05 2009, 05:21PM
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Jason Gregor wrote:

and 12-89-26

Finally he gets it right.

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#43 R-DAWG
February 05 2009, 05:29PM
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I sucks when you want to predict an Oiler victory,but that little guy on your shoulder is saying..."WHAT are f-in crazy!!?" YUP! OIL 4-1...I hope!

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#44 Jack "slacking off at work" Bauer
February 05 2009, 05:30PM
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Who is in net tonight?

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#45 R-DAWG
February 05 2009, 05:37PM
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Almost without a doubt Roli...at this time of year I don't see a way to work JD in!

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#46 APE
February 05 2009, 05:45PM
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Jason Gregor wrote:

MAP is scratched tonight…Looks like Reddox on 3rd line and Potulny on 4th…Penner back with 10 and 83, and 12-89-26.

Why wouldn't Reddox stay on the 4th and Potulny go on the 3rd? I'm so sick of this Marty Reddox man crush already..

Mac T listen up. REDDOX IS A PLUG

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#47 APE
February 05 2009, 05:46PM
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Sorry I meant Toby Reddox. My apologies Marty.

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#48 Bru Man
February 05 2009, 05:48PM
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You know Winchester gonna pot one tonight or mabey two...

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#49 baggedmilk
February 05 2009, 06:22PM
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Ten minutes until game time. Which Oilers team shows up tonight?

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#50 Poo Czar
February 05 2009, 06:24PM
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@ baggedmilk: Please don't let it be Uncle Tickle...

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