The sh*t winds of change

Wanye
May 29 2009 10:30AM

mrlahey

With the recent FMNFing and the new armada of Coaching staff sailing into the Bay of OilersNation, there is bound to be a ton of changes in the approach to the game of hockey, the personnel involved on the ice and the overall attitude at RX1.

Given that the team has been a steaming cup of shitanusly mediocre hockey these past three years, a whole new approach is pretty much A-OK with everyone who is involved with this team, both in the stands and off the ice.

Whether or not GM Tambellini is going to be able to shed some of the heavy contracts and be freed up to chase new (read: better) players remains to be seen. But what is clear is that the list of underachieving meat bags is long and the potential destinations for said bags of meat is short. While a great many current Oilers may not be around to see the puck drop on opening night, three players spring to mind as those who could benefit most from a coaching change.

For many of these doghousian Oilers, this will be their last chance in an Oilers uniform.

Rob “Last chance to amount to anything” Schremp

butterStats last year: (AHL) 69 GP 7G - 35A - 42 Pts (NHL) 4 GP 0G - 3A - Pts

Good case scenario 09-10: (NHL) 10G - 10A - 20 Pts Bad case scenario 09-10: AHL4lyfe

It’s no surprise to anyone who pays rapt attention to the Oilers that Schremp is pumped to see his career nemesis head on to other (as yet unnamed) opportunities. “It would be nice, obviously, if I’d been playing in the NHL the last couple of years, but this is what the organization wanted to do with me, develop me in Springfield,” Schremp was quoted recently saying in a Yahoo sports article.  “So that’s that path you have to take. Hopefully I’m on track to play in the NHL next year. Hopefully it’s a new opportunity. But I think the organization has had my best interests in mind since I’ve been drafted. It’s not just MacTavish, it’s the whole organization that has to make plays with my career. They want to develop me and make sure I’m ready. Hopefully next year is the year I make it. I hope that’s what the plan is.

Don't you worry about what the plan is there Robbie. There is a solid plan and the Oilers are executing it. Why the plan called for making the SCF06 then missing the playoffs for the next three years we will never know - but there is a plan. Believe that. Perhaps rather than worrying about the plan ol’ Lord Schrempington might instead get out of his own way long enough to make something of an NHL career.

By all accounts Schemp’s attitude is quite poor but his hands are by all same accounts s-i-c-k. But as any one of the 1000 YouTube sensations will attest, sick hands don’t get you no NHL career in this day and age.

Dustin “Donair Please” Penner

donairStats last year: 78GP 17G - 20A - 37 Pts

Good case scenario 09-10: 25G - 25A - 50 Pts Bad case scenario 09-10: 15G - 10A - 25 Pts

Even we are starting to feel for Dustin Penner. On a team with an incurable case of mediocre craptitis, DDPP is the poster boy for what is ailing with the Oil. Invisible down the stretch, quiet on many nights, the Donairan one still found a way to pot 17 tucks and collect 37 points last season which really ain’t too bad if you step back, ignore his contract and squint at the stats page. It’s kinda like a magic eye – the beauty might not reveal itself right off the bat.

But much like Schremp, Penner is playing below his immense potential and could certainly use a change of coaching pace after MacT, who threw DDPP under the bus on a few occasions last year and generally didn’t get along with #27 most of the time. Fortunately for Penner it was the Coach that ended up leaving town not him and perhaps the new coaching staff and a fresh approach is exactly what he needs to elevate his game.

Robert “Muffin man” Nilsson

muffinStats last year: 64GP 9G-20A-29 Pts

Good case scenario 09-10: 12G – 35 A – 47 Pts Bad case scenario 09-10: 8 G – 15 A – 23 Pts

We used to love us some Robert Nilsson back in his rookie year. Quick on the wing, sporting a cool half visor and a big part of that “let’s-go-on-a-run-down-the-stretch-with-only-rookies-only-to-break-Wanye’s-heart-again” run back in 07-08.

He was able to keep himself busy during last year on many nights distributing little muffins all over the ice: when he was carrying the puck, when he nervously entered the corners, when he was directing soft little flubbers on net. Despite all this fresh baked softness he only able to score 9 goals.

9 goals – despite all the PP and ice time.

9 measly goals.

If we were coaching the Oil and Nilsson had 9 paltry goals in a season we would hire his Dad Kent to come over as a special consultant to the team. His only duty – beating his son without mercy and forcing the two to share a room on the road. That would learn the little bastard. But we suppose some of these finicky racehorses are sometimes better suited to a soft touch and by all accounts Mr. Renney and his velvet gloves should bring exactly that to the table.

Thinking about the 09-10 season

wanyesroom

When we lie awake at night in our bed - pictured above - we often now worry about how good the Oilers will be next year. We worry long and hard. If the Oil are going to do anything but repeat the same monstrous disappointment of last year, these three players above are going to have to have a big say in it. We would go so far as to suggest that as goes these three underachievers so goes the team.

9 Goals Nilsson. You oughta be ashamed.

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#51 RossCreek
May 29 2009, 01:26PM
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Wanye Gretz wrote:

I once witnessed the craziest brawl inside that place after the bars shut and the donair cook came out with the gigantic sword he used to shave the meat and threatened the fighters.

Holy FACK! LOL. Great comments on this here blog.

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#52 RossCreek
May 29 2009, 01:38PM
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cambosmash wrote:

Don’t worry, the meat still comes of a rotating spit that has been turning the same piece for days. What do they do with that meat at night is what I want to know? Just keep it rotating? Turn it off and leave it? Refrigerate it? Throw it in a dumpster? If so, I’ll be hanging out behind donair shops every night until my heart stops.

LOLOLOLOLOL. I'm crying.

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#53 Archaeologuy
May 29 2009, 01:39PM
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Jonathan Willis wrote:

I’m not sure why the coaching change is portrayed so often as good for Schremp

It's just a chance to be seen for the 1st time again. 1st impressions are hard to overcome. Its not like all of a sudden he can finally become the top centre on the team, just that he has a better chance to stick if he has a better camp than say Pouliot.

Good Donair place, some kinda Donair joint on 137th ave and 36 st. It's so good that I dont even know its name. I cant keep my eyes off of the Donairs long enough to look up to see the sign above the door.

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#54 Robin Brownlee
May 29 2009, 02:14PM
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When did this turn in HF? For God sake, Wanye, donairs? Fack. Why not just inject a litre of bacon fat or mayo directly into your left heart ventricle or aorta or maybe start smoking 16 cigars a day? Hey, wait a minute . . .

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#55 DK0
May 29 2009, 02:21PM
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@ Robin Brownlee: I love this site cause of stuff like this. You got your stats posts (willis), your insider info posts (you and Gregor) and then you got Wanye's "F*ck ya! Its Friday bitches!" type posts where you can let the wheels fall of and completely derail from the topic.

Good mix.

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#56 Heazues
May 29 2009, 02:23PM
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shremp will probably get his sniff this year. but more than likely will not stick. even though he is on the right track, his development is sloooooooooow. it would be nice if he made a good impression though, if he can turn into the player most people hope he will, it will be worth the time spent in the AHL.

IMHO penner will have a better year. $4.5M better...who knows. but it was clear he couldnt do ryan smyths job and he actually looked better on the 4th line than he did on the 1st. if he were given 1st/2nd line and was allowed to play his style, i imagine he will be better. now lay off the doughnuts and start on a good note.

nilsson..... GAWD MAN, SMARTEN UP!!!!!!! how do i get a job making $2M a year to sit on my @SS? for that kind of money id play, be stick boy, clean the ice and shine my coaches loafers before every scrum. whats it going to take to see a little drive out of this guy?

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#57 Librarian Mike
May 29 2009, 02:23PM
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@ Robin Brownlee:

Still trying to quit? Hang in there.

I have a question about this steroid bust in Washington. Do you get the feeling that the league is a little scared about this? It seems that they're working really hard to discredit this guy as a small time scumbag who's trying to use misdirection to cover his ass. While I'm sure that's an accurate description of him, that's also what people said about Jose Canseco, and it turned out he was right on the money. What are your thoughts?

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#58 DaveS
May 29 2009, 02:36PM
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For all you west enders, try "Bugsy's" in the Mayfield Common, next to save-on. Most people I know need 2 sittings to finish their jumbo donair. They also have one of the best Montreal smoked meat sandwiches in town.

If Kent Nilsson was "The Magic Man" does that make Robert Nilsson "The Muffin Man"? Still our 2nd best set up after Hemsky though.

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#59 dyckster
May 29 2009, 02:36PM
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2nd time poster. What's the deal with the donair craze anyway? I moved here from The Peg in 1999 (I never saw them there, they must be an Alberta phenom) and have yet to polute my intestines with one of these things. I see the "meat" rotating at some of the places I go and it looks like liver....geee ross. Schremp out, Penner (good manitoba boy btw) in, nilsson, moreau, and staios see ya. Great blog gents (I'm assuming you're all gents) I'll be a regular from now on!

Oh ya, goat for 09/10 none other than Grebeshkov (sic?), now that he's got the big contract......(pisani & horcoff ring a bell?)

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#60 RossCreek
May 29 2009, 02:44PM
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@ Wanye: Good call on lunch today. I'll be checking in to see what I should eat for lunch tomorrow.

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#61 mjsh
May 29 2009, 02:47PM
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If Jagr comes and plays first line left wing, do we think, Penner, Gagner and O'sullivan is a nice second line? I like Rowbear but he just might end up on the first line in Springfield with Shremp.

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#62 Robin Brownlee
May 29 2009, 02:51PM
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dyckster wrote:

Great blog gents (I’m assuming you’re all gents)

Ahem, I'm assuming nobody told you about Wanye being in limbo during the "transition?" Crying Game, I mean crying shame.

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#63 dyckster
May 29 2009, 03:00PM
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Robin Brownlee wrote:I’m assuming nobody told you about Wanye being in limbo during the “transition?”

Read more: "The sh*t winds of change - OilersNation.com#comments" - http://www.oilersnation.com/2009/05/the-sht-winds-of-change/#comments#ixzz0Gvo8WmSK&A

Oops, my bad. I'll be more sensitive next time. He/She or She/He?

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#64 Ducey
May 29 2009, 03:20PM
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I bet Quinn/Renney want some guys to venture in front of the net, get some rebounds, screen the goalie, get some tip ins etc. This is all Detroit does.

Last year the Oil hardly did any of this. Penner was the only one who screened the goalie and occassionally Gagner would cross through the crease. As a team they might have had 5 deflections!

I expect Penner will get lots of icetime and if he isn't killed by a Vish/Sour pointshot, should do well.

Re:Schremp. The last thing the the Oil needs is another peripheral player whose chief skill is making "nice" backdoor passes every third game. He has a slight chance if they get rid of O'Sullivan and Nillson and Pouliot, he checks, hits a little, and improves his skating.

Yeah, saving a bus crash at training camp, he's done.

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#65 DK0
May 29 2009, 03:27PM
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@ dyckster: theres your first ON lesson, if you want to quote someone, click the quote button beside their post and it'll setup all the tags for you on its own. if you only want to quote part of their text, select it and then click quote, and if you dont want to quote but want to direct a reply click reply. Copying/pasting from the site puts that extra link into your clipboard.

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#66 Jack Bauer
May 29 2009, 03:29PM
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Just to let you all know, Marco's Donair no longer holds that name. I believe it is Mike's Donair with brand new flashy menus. BUT dont fear former Marco's patrons, the bald headed man who cooks these delicious morsels of heart attacks still works there and will gladly microwave your poutine for you.

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#67 Boris
May 29 2009, 03:34PM
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DaveS wrote:

They also have one of the best Montreal smoked meat sandwiches in town.

I've been looking for a place to get a good smoked meat sandwich since Wolfie's closed down. Even the Metro in Calgary is gone....thanks for the tip, I know where I am going on Monday for lunch!!

Penner will be OK this year I am hoping Nilsson will be too because who will take the contract off our hands?

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#68 Reggie
May 29 2009, 03:49PM
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Librarian Mike wrote:

My prediction for this year’s star is Dustin Penner, who will score 30 and play like a man possessed after 2 years of MacTyranny. My goat will be Moreau, who will not be captain by the end of this coming season.

What makes you think he might still be captain by the end of training camp ? New coaches, new regime, new ideas ... I see Souray (if he isn't traded to ease the salary cap issues for next year) as our new Captain.

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#69 Chaz
May 29 2009, 03:50PM
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Robin Brownlee wrote:

Ahem, I’m assuming nobody told you about Wanye being in limbo during the “transition?” Crying Game, I mean crying shame.

Do you guys have a QOD (Quote of the Day) a la' the HON on Sports Center? If so, rack him.

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#70 Librarian Mike
May 29 2009, 03:55PM
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@ Reggie:

I was being safe by saying 'end of the year'. Moreau's been a good soldier for awhile now, but I'm a believer in the idea that a captain has to be at least one of the top 3 players on the team.

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#71 Librarian Mike
May 29 2009, 03:57PM
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Robin Brownlee wrote:

Ahem, I’m assuming nobody told you about Wanye being in limbo during the “transition?” Crying Game, I mean crying shame.

There's nothing hotter than a girl who likes donair.

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#72 Reggie
May 29 2009, 03:58PM
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Librarian Mike wrote:

@ Reggie: I was being safe by saying ‘end of the year’. Moreau’s been a good soldier for awhile now, but I’m a believer in the idea that a captain has to be at least one of the top 3 players on the team.

I hear ya Mike, I just believe that they will admit his style or plain lack of leadership last season was exposed.

A change will be coming with the leadership core.

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#73 Archaeologuy
May 29 2009, 04:09PM
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dyckster wrote:

What’s the deal with the donair craze anyway? I moved here from The Peg in 1999 (I never saw them there, they must be an Alberta phenom) and have yet to polute my intestines with one of these things. I see the “meat” rotating at some of the places I go and it looks like liver….geee ross

Sir, do not disparage of what you know not. Bite the bullet and try one. Dont continue the stereotype of the xenophobic westerner, embrace the foreign deliciousness of the Donair. Then tell us how it went.

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#74 David S
May 29 2009, 04:18PM
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Here is the internet winner of donair shops in Edmonton -

Charles Smart Donair 8952 82 Ave

Supposed to be crazy good!

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#75 kingsblade
May 29 2009, 04:27PM
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@ Gregor: @ Brownlee: @ Willis:

A bit off-topic:

I was just reading a story about Columbus losing millions every year and desperate to fix it. What do you think of the chances of dealing for an extended Nash?

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#76 Ender the Dragon
May 29 2009, 04:31PM
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Wanye Gretz wrote:

Anyone else have a champion donair eatery to shout out?

Chaz wrote:

Simon King donair. It’s in a strip mall on 91 st and 51 Ave. Absolutely delightful.

Seconded. Also, I rarely find anyplace that serves a burger I can't finish, but Simon King is one such.

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#77 bingofuel
May 29 2009, 04:31PM
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David S wrote:

Here is the internet winner of donair shops in Edmonton - Charles Smart Donair 8952 82 Ave Supposed to be crazy good!

I drive by there every day, almost, and I'm sorry to say they've been shut down -- at least at that location -- for about two months. :(

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#78 David S
May 29 2009, 04:35PM
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bingofuel wrote:

David S wrote: Here is the internet winner of donair shops in Edmonton - Charles Smart Donair 8952 82 Ave Supposed to be crazy good! I drive by there every day, almost, and I’m sorry to say they’ve been shut down — at least at that location — for about two months.

That sucks. Maybe Dustin Penner changed locations for his after-game meal.

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#79 Ender the Dragon
May 29 2009, 04:40PM
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Question: Why is it referred to as donair meat? Not donair beef, or anything else that identifies the animal of origin; just meat. . .

Does this worry anyone besides me? Or is it ok to eat mixed roadkill as long as too many questions aren't asked, kind of like the 5-second rule?

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#80 The Menace
May 29 2009, 04:49PM
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A buddy recommended Charles Smart to me before, I've never been. He said it got more than just a thumbs up from him.

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#81 Robin Brownlee
May 29 2009, 04:59PM
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bingofuel wrote:

I drive by there every day, almost, and I’m sorry to say they’ve been shut down — at least at that location — for about two months.

Apparently there was an unfortunate run-in with the city's health inspectors after traces of hobo DNA was discovered in the meat preparation area.

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#82 DK0
May 29 2009, 05:02PM
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@ bingofuel: @ David S: @ The Menace: Yeah i can confirm that Charles Smart is definitely boarded up and out of commission. Walked by there yesterday when i took the wrong damn bus and got dropped off 15 blocks from home. If you are somehow stranded in that are and need food theres always late night Humpties on 95th(?) and whyte (BARF)

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#83 Librarian Mike
May 29 2009, 05:45PM
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Ender the Dragon wrote:

Question: Why is it referred to as donair meat? Not donair beef, or anything else that identifies the animal of origin; just meat. . . Does this worry anyone besides me? Or is it ok to eat mixed roadkill as long as too many questions aren’t asked, kind of like the 5-second rule?

That is the funniest thing I've read today, and it's been a funny day! There is definitely a tacit 'Don't ask, don't tell' rule between donair customers and vendors. I never tried Charles Smart, but I'm regretting it based on the comments.

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#84 B.C.B.
May 29 2009, 06:50PM
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Ender the Dragon wrote:

Question: Why is it referred to as donair meat? Not donair beef, or anything else that identifies the animal of origin; just meat. . .

The reason it is called 'meat' is that it is a mixture of meat: usually lamb and beef, if my travels through the eastern Mediterranean has taught me anything. Also Donair is Turkish and Gyros is Greek. Here in Onterrible they serve it with pickled (purple) turnip: and it is great!

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#85 99thoilerfan
May 29 2009, 08:23PM
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Chaz wrote:

Wanye Gretz wrote: Anyone else have a champion donair eatery to shout out? Simon King donair. It’s in a strip mall on 91 st and 51 Ave. Absolutely delightful.

DING ! DING ! DING !

That is the place I was thinking about ! N E Corner ( by the Royal Bank )

Mmm I love it when the extra grease, fills the bottom of the wrap...

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#86 Jodes
May 29 2009, 11:33PM
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@ Wanye Gretz:

No way man.. Donair Express is the ONLY place in Edmonton for Donairs!

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#87 Jonathan Willis
May 29 2009, 11:56PM
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kingsblade wrote:

What do you think of the chances of dealing for an extended Nash?

Slim to none? When teams need to dump salary, they seem to do stuff like send Andy McDonald to St. Louis or Mathieu Schneider to Atlanta.

The #1 talent almost always remains in place unless he's going to be lost to free agency anyways; G.M.'s ignoring that formula are rare and rarely successful (Pronger from STL to EDM and then EDM to ANA, Luongo to FLA and then VAN, Thornton to SJ).

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#88 David S
May 29 2009, 11:56PM
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Funny thing that this post is titled "The sh*t winds of change" because that's exactly what you experience the morning after your 3:00 AM super donair. Usually a nice, satisfying bowl filler too.

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#89 99thoilerfan
May 30 2009, 05:55AM
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David S wrote:

Funny thing that this post is titled “The sh*t winds of change” because that’s exactly what you experience the morning after your 3:00 AM super donair. Usually a nice, satisfying bowl filler too.

With the DQ Twist !

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#90 Scott
May 30 2009, 07:16AM
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Wanye Gretz wrote:

Anyone else have a champion donair eatery to shout out?

High Voltage on the corner of Calgary Trail and Argyl is my choice. Best ever!!!!

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#91 Toothless Joe McGregor
May 30 2009, 10:41AM
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If youve got a King there is also the Queen. She just happens to be located on 75th and 75th. Tasty Doner meat with all the usuall fix'ems.

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#92 kingsblade
May 30 2009, 10:59AM
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Jonathan Willis wrote:

kingsblade wrote: What do you think of the chances of dealing for an extended Nash? Slim to none? When teams need to dump salary, they seem to do stuff like send Andy McDonald to St. Louis or Mathieu Schneider to Atlanta. The #1 talent almost always remains in place unless he’s going to be lost to free agency anyways; G.M.’s ignoring that formula are rare and rarely successful (Pronger from STL to EDM and then EDM to ANA, Luongo to FLA and then VAN, Thornton to SJ).

Yeah I worded my question poorly. I think I was just asking if you though it was worth looking into or if he wouldn't be worth his expected salary. I have a hard time deciding where I'd peg his worth in terms of salary.

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#93 Chris
June 01 2009, 01:01PM
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Reggie wrote:

I see Souray (if he isn’t traded to ease the salary cap issues for next year) as our new Captain.

It's a little early to write off Moreau. Quinn, historically, has really liked players of Moreau's ilk. If the "kids" weren't receptive to his leadership style... it might be the "kids" who get spanked under Quinn. Remember, Moreau only rented out the party house: it was the "Young Guns" living there who were up all hours drinking and eating take out pizza.

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#94 Mayor of MJ
June 02 2009, 07:05AM
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Wayne Gretz, you know nothing about anything. We all know that god himself could not lead the oil to a cup, let alon Pat. The oilers have been very comfortable in the basement season after season snuggled up in the early exits that they are known for. I actualy heard a rumour that some of the players actualy receive a bonus from some of the local golf clubs, when they clinch for their lives for the remaining playoff spot,and then two weeks before playoffs p*ss it down their legs just like a three year old wetting the bed! Face it, sit back oilers nation and enjoy another wings cup winning season!

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