Odds n Sods

Wanye
September 23 2009 10:31AM

It’s a very fine Wednesday in Edmonton. The temperature is expected to hit 33 degrees, gymnasts are jumping off of incredible crap in the video above, we are still aflutter from the Keith Urban concert we attended last night and speculation about the state of the Oilers is starting to ramp up. Tis a very fine Wednesday indeed.

Jim Matheson has a review of the Oilers in the preseason to date and there are some interesting tidbits of information that can be gleaned from the article. He suggests that the youth at camp are making a name for themselves and this problem is further exacerbated by the fact that some veterans aren’t playing up to snuff:

“The sound you hear is the clock ticking and the theme song from the TV show Jeopardy playing. Time is running out and Edmonton Oilers coach Pat Quinn has to find some answers, and soon. So far, his young players have played better than his veterans, in a lot of cases. See Eberle, Jordan. See Stone, Ryan. See Jacques, J. F. Rick Olczyk, who has the calculator out every day as the team's salary cap guru, has made out several possible roster cards with wages to make sure they are under the$56.8-million cap ceiling. They are over it, if you take last year's roster, subtracting Dwayne Roloson's $3.66-milion cap hit and adding Nikolai Khabibulin's$3.75 million and Mike Comrie's $1.25-million salary. Something has to give by the Oct. 1 deadline for declaring rosters. If Eberle makes it at $1.187 million, rather than going back to the Regina Pats, and Stone stays at $600,000, rather than hike off to Springfield in the American Hockey League, that's fine and dandy for the fiscal situation. But if Eberle makes it, Robert Nilsson might not and he has two years left at $2 million a season. If Stone makes it, that helps with the dollars, but if he's in, where does that put right winger Fernando Pisani, who makes $2.5 million on the last year of a four-year contract? Could a popular local guy who scored five game-winners in the Oilers' 2006 Stanley Cup run be in trouble? Some veterans aren't staying if some kids make it.”

We know from watching Brownlee operate these past two seasons that the wily veteran reporters will often couch fact in speculation and articles like these are often signs of things to come. The fact that Nilsson is considered to be on the bubble isn’t the craziest thing we have ever heard. Readers of the Nation have been calling for his head since mid way through the 1998 season, despite the notable handicap of being only 13 years old at the time.

But this business of Pisani? We can’t understand how the 2006 Cup run Hero, a guy who has recently suffered a bout of well documented illnesses, can be considered on the bubble. Is his play really falling that far below expectations?

Quotes that entertain

keithurbanWillis threw down a plain ol' quote yesterday, something that we didn’t know we could just throw out there like that. So for your consideration, we present a pair of equally entertaining quotes we have read recently.

Quote #1

Dustin Penner , who became the whipping boy for Oiler Nation frustration last winter, says he imbibed a few less "wheat-based drinks" over the summer, and has reported to training camp lighter (although he won't say by how much).”

Heh heh heh. Oiler Nation indeed. It’s a shame that DP hasn’t been lighting the world on fire with his ice hockey game play. His disdain for talking to reporters produces some hilarious replies to the generic questions posed of the big man. Quick thought though. You seem to enjoy entertaining people Dustin. That fantastic. Know what would put a smile on Oilers fans from coast to coast? Playing better hockey. Yeah, that might win you some more fans. As much as we love the stand up comedy every time you get a microphone in the face, perhaps you could take time out of your Yuk Yuks circuit to pot a few goals this season.

Quote #2

“Pat Quinn was asked if there was any danger in Jordan Eberle being the best player in the preseason so far. Quinn: (Laughing) absolutely there is. It’s like taking a green tomato and wanting to make a salad out of it.”

These folksy quotes from Pat Quinn are starting to grow on us. This homespun wisdom is exactly what the Oilers need. Green tomatoes indeed you delightful chap. You whip this team into shape you son of a gun.

Got a text from the Oilers

Anyone else get a text from the Oilers last night? We sure did:

OIL FANS: B there when ur Oilers play the Flames on Wed and the Canucks on Sun. Get tix online @ edmontonoilers.com now!

What on earth? “B?”“ur?”“tix?”“Canucks?” How on earth did the Oilers get our phone number!? Does sexy texting Sheldon Souray at 345 AM every Saturday somehow qualify us for this texting database? Cause we didn’t sign up for this service. We like hearing from our local hockey squadron as much as the next guy, don't get us wrong. But this text from heaven is just bizarre.

Damn Oilers and their mind control devices. How did they know that we want tickets to the game on Sunday? It's just plain creepy.

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#1 patty
September 23 2009, 10:36AM
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that text was nuts. what does 71199 spell?

C U L8R Oil!

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#2 bingofuel
September 23 2009, 10:37AM
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I got the same text, Wanye. Remember how we were trying to get the phrase "OilersNation.com is the shit, biatches" on the big screen at Rexall last season? And the Oil kept screening our hilarity?

Well, they add phone numbers that texted their big screen to a database and now send text blasts out to fans... or drunken idiots trying to surreptitiously promote their ragtag website.

Spam, even from the Oilers, is not cool.

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#3 Ender the Dragon
September 23 2009, 10:39AM
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Sounds like Penner's looks have improved if nothing else; with his love for entertainment, any chance we could trade him to Keith Urban for a couple of new ice-girls?

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#4 froese
September 23 2009, 10:41AM
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That text shocked me too haha, I had no idea how they got my number.

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#5 Wanye Gretz
September 23 2009, 10:43AM
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bingofuel wrote:

Remember how we were trying to get the phrase “OilersNation.com is the shit, biatches” on the big screen at Rexall last season? And the Oil kept screening our hilarity?

OH YEAH!! Is that how they got it? Damn. The Oilerz r slick. How they talked 2 me in txt tlk was super gr8 2.

LOLZ

<3

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#6 patty
September 23 2009, 10:44AM
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@ bingofuel: That sucks. those texts on the screen are stupid anyway.

Next time I take my nephew to a game, I swear he won't get a 'Happy birthday Holden!' I don't care how much he cries.

I thought Comrie was 1.125, not 1.25?

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#7 freeze
September 23 2009, 10:45AM
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The bigger question is how do we get off that list? Can we reply to it?

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#8 freeze
September 23 2009, 10:47AM
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@ patty: Matheson shot down that rumour in his article today. 1.25 which was in-between his asking price of 1.5 and the Oil offer of 1.0.

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#9 scorecoff hemmercules
September 23 2009, 11:03AM
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patty wrote:

I thought Comrie was 1.125, not 1.25?

nhlnumbers has him at 1.125 mil. Most of the articles I have read say the same thing. Matheson says different, who's right?

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#10 jeanshorts
September 23 2009, 11:32AM
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PARKOUR! PARKOUR! PARKOUR! PARKOUR!

bingofuel wrote:

I got the same text, Wanye. Remember how we were trying to get the phrase “OilersNation.com is the shit, biatches” on the big screen at Rexall last season? And the Oil kept screening our hilarity?

JSBM tried to do that too! Only with our shoddily made webspace! And then even when we tried to post up lame family friendly ones they never showed up either. They obviously knew who they were dealing worth, or that whole thing is just a giant scam to harvest people's cellular telephone data.

PARKOUR!

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#11 R Kenny
September 23 2009, 11:37AM
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Country-style power stance... nice.

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#12 The Towel Boy
September 23 2009, 11:38AM
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Those Oiler tech guys are sneaky sons a b!tches! Man! What's next? Direct messages on twitter offering me a tinyurl site with promises of barely legal webcam bliss?!?

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#13 Travis Dakin
September 23 2009, 11:44AM
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I must be doing something wrong, I've been texting the jumbotron for two years now and not only have I not seen my message up there, Now I find out that they are sexting everyone else except me. I thought I got escaped that type of shame when I left school 11 years ago.

*locates gun, scurries to find a note pad*

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#14 Jeff
September 23 2009, 12:13PM
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Pisani is staying. I mean if the team wants to actually kill penalties. If the choice comes down to Nilsson and Pisani you obviously take Pisani.

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#15 Bob Loblaw
September 23 2009, 12:50PM
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I understand the Oilers are trying to perfect sending messages directly to the frontal lobes of your brains.

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#16 RossCreek
September 23 2009, 12:56PM
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Pisani stays. Could be as 4th line C tho

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#17 no clue
September 23 2009, 01:29PM
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Cool vid. I mean aside from the homo-balancing part in the middle, i had to watch some (straight) porn to clear my mind.

Speaking of porn, I watched the Pat Quinn vid on the Oil site and sounds like BigMac might be on the way out, I am guessing that means Brennan/Stortini are expected to fill that role. Has anybody seen clips of Brennan's fights? Is he tough? does anybody think he'll stick?

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#18 GLoKz0r
September 23 2009, 01:31PM
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I don't think it's the jumbotron texts, but the jumbotron trivia that gets you. When I've been at a game, I've usually thrown my lot in during one of the trivia challenges, but I've never texted the jumbotron to get my message on the board.

That said, my friend who's gone to a couple games with me has texted the jumbotron to get his message on the board, but not the trivia. He never received a message.

Coincidence?

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#19 Ryan
September 23 2009, 02:02PM
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I text the jumbotron all the time, but only sexy messages to Wanye. I've yet to see a return message on the screen. :(

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#20 Wanye Gretz
September 23 2009, 02:18PM
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Ryan wrote:

I text the jumbotron all the time, but only sexy messages to Wanye. I’ve yet to see a return message on the screen.

I've never received these sexy texties?! Are you sure you have my correct number?

*waits by phone awaiting texts to pour in*

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#21 Hemmertime
September 23 2009, 02:18PM
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hxxp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_mpNUl3swk&feature=related

PARKOUR! PARKOUR!

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#22 Ender the Dragon
September 23 2009, 02:59PM
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@ Hemmertime: Admittedly, if you didn't watch Wanye's video first, this wouldn't be very good. After watching the original that Wanye posted, however, this is freakin' hilarious. Nice find!

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#23 Jaime
September 23 2009, 04:58PM
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Green tomatoes are perfectly good when fried, Pat Quinn.

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#24 Jason Gregor
September 23 2009, 05:09PM
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scorecoff hemmercules wrote:

nhlnumbers has him at 1.125 mil. Most of the articles I have read say the same thing. Matheson says different, who’s right?

Matheson is right...the contract with the league is for $1.25 million...

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#25 Rusty Duggan
September 23 2009, 06:26PM
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Is the game on tv tonight at all...via ppv or anything?

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#26 BarryS
September 23 2009, 06:46PM
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@ Rusty Duggan: Tonights is on the computer, tomorrows on one of the TSN's

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#27 David S
September 23 2009, 06:46PM
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Rusty Duggan wrote:

Is the game on tv tonight at all…via ppv or anything?

I checked TSN and TSN2 schedules today. No luck.

Looks like its Oilers PixelVision® with the Max Headroom stutter built right in.

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#28 EddieEdmonton
September 23 2009, 06:46PM
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those texts came from thescore hardcore hockey

i think the game is on the oilers website not sure thou i hope it iss i want to watch it

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#29 EddieEdmonton
September 23 2009, 06:55PM
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how many fights you thhink we'lll see tonight? i hope soonone beats the ungly off of dion

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#30 EddieEdmonton
September 23 2009, 06:57PM
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EddieEdmonton wrote:

i hope soonone beats the ungly off of dion

i hope someone beats the ugly off of dion

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#31 Jonathan Willis
September 23 2009, 06:58PM
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Rick Olczyk, who has the calculator out every day as the team’s salary cap guru, has made out several possible roster cards with wages to make sure they are under the$56.8-million cap ceiling. They are over it, if you take last year’s roster, subtracting Dwayne Roloson’s $3.66-milion cap hit and adding Nikolai Khabibulin’s$3.75 million and Mike Comrie’s $1.25-million salary.

I wonder if they thought to delete the salary of someone bound for the minors - say Liam Reddox - because just adding Comrie/Khabibulin and subtracting Roloson would put them one player over the roster limit.

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#32 Phil
September 23 2009, 07:15PM
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On a side note, that video you posted with the blog entry is SICK.

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#33 Rusty Duggan
September 23 2009, 07:39PM
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@ BarryS: Thx for the info

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#34 Dave
September 23 2009, 07:44PM
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Any chance the Oilers asked to be on the pk a ton?

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#35 Eric
September 24 2009, 12:09AM
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Pennertrate had a fine game tonight.

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#36 RossCreek
September 24 2009, 12:17AM
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Bring back Chimera

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#37 roughneck
September 24 2009, 09:25AM
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hey wanye... after that ________fest last night U still want tickets for sunday?

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#38 ogzlttg
October 10 2009, 06:18AM
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65aH1P mlsdmdrmdsyh, [url=http://ikceqfetkqhk.com/]ikceqfetkqhk[/url], [link=http://qjebmpebtauw.com/]qjebmpebtauw[/link], http://ixjooqgjrrux.com/

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