HAWKS WIN HAWKS WIN

Wanye
June 10 2010 09:22AM

Jason Gregor made the following claim on Facebook yesterday afternoon: "Flyers will win and game seven goes Friday. Nothing better than game seven...at least in the sports world."

Heh heh heh.

Gregor.

He was wrong of course and Patrick Kane was oh so right slipping a mystery past Leighton early in the first period of overtime to give the Chicago Blackhawks their first Stanley Cup since 1784, when a young Robin Brownlee was heard to remark "This Pierre Pilote is going to be one heck of a defenseman."

Good on you Kane you tricky little weasel.

AND GOOD ON YOU CHICAGO

Even the stone heartest among us have to find some joy in Chicago winning the Stanley Cup. A long suffering member of the Original Six, Chi Town hadn't won a cup since 1961. 1961 Nation. Think of the generations of fans that passed through Chicago Stadium and the United Centre without a whisper of hope for so many years.

Think of the street vendors expecting to make a living selling bootleg Stanley Cup Champions merchandise that starved to death anonymously under bridges all around the greater Chicago area.

Think of the building managers at the AON Center in downtown Chicago who came up with the wicked lighting schema above. Who knows how long this had been in the making? It was probably be one of those dark secrets passed down from generation to generation of building managers, just waiting for a chance to see the light of day.

"Now listen new guy" the old building manager would say on his last day on the job before retiring. "There is a secret plan in the event the Hawks win the Cup." Then he would painfully amble over to a long forgotten bookshelf in the corner of his office, deep in the bowels of the building.

Blowing the dust off an ancient file folder marked "THE PLAN" he would carefully go over the protocols to turn off the breaker switches to 17 floors of corner offices. Incredulously the new guy would listen on, fresh with the ideals of being a recent graduate of Building Manager School, wondering if he would be able to enact the intricate plan should the big day ever arrive.

Well that day has arrived Gentlemen and you have earned your treat.

Congrats to the building managers at the AON Centre. Congrats to the street vendors in Chicago, happily selling bootleg teeshirts, flags and hats as fast as their illegal overseas suppliers can keep pace.

Congrats to the 2010 Chicago Blackhawks.

Except you Hossa, we don't care for you in the least.

Hat tip to DJ Ross Creek for the party anthem.

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#51 Matt Henderson
June 10 2010, 01:30PM
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Wayne's other bastard child wrote:

I love you Wayne!!!!

Who is Wayne?

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#52 Minister D-
June 10 2010, 01:30PM
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@Matt Henderson

Very interesting quote from Tambo in the Journal: “it’s getting clearer as to what may be separating the players.”

. I smell "intangibles."

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#53 Matt Henderson
June 10 2010, 01:31PM
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@Minister D-

Yeah, I wish he would elaborate, but he wont say a meaningful word until the Oilers actually select someone.

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#54 Senator Theo
June 10 2010, 01:32PM
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BUCK75 wrote:

Nothing in Ponoka...yet. I would even take the Menacer out on a $1 tee time. My treat of course~

May we should get in some practice beers.

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#55 BUCK75
June 10 2010, 01:39PM
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@Wanye

OOOOO, it has been a long time since I have golfed with a celebrity.

Deal!

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#56 BUCK75
June 10 2010, 01:40PM
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@Senator Theo

If we have to pack around Wanye, we might need a practice round of beers.

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#57 Ender
June 10 2010, 01:58PM
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baggedmilk wrote:

Are you suggesting that the JSBM crew are a less-than-classy bunch?

Poo Czar wrote:

Princes of respectability on the internet, to a man.

While I look forward to any gathering where the JSBM crew are in attendence, it would be wrong of me to pretend I'd feel comfortable without food in my hand ready to throw. If that defines classy for us, lay an extra napkin and color me fashionably on-time.

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#58 David S
June 10 2010, 02:15PM
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Poo Czar wrote:

Princes of respectability on the internet, to a man.

Yep. No doubt. Haha!

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#59 rubbertrout
June 10 2010, 03:02PM
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David S wrote:

That's a Pandora's box you don't want to open. Jeanshorts, Baggedmilk, Poo Czar and the Dakins would be the death of you.

To say nothing of Rusty Duggan. How I love Fridays at JSBM's site . . .

*silently damns the moderators

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#60 Poo Czar
June 10 2010, 03:07PM
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rubbertrout wrote:

To say nothing of Rusty Duggan. How I love Fridays at JSBM's site . . .

*silently damns the moderators

I believe you're thinking about Admiral Rusty Shackleford.

(side note: David S is not David Staples. Likely a similar gap in classiness. You're welcome Rusty Duggan)

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#61 cableguy - 2nd Tier Fan
June 10 2010, 03:14PM
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Poo Czar wrote:

I believe you're thinking about Admiral Rusty Shackleford.

(side note: David S is not David Staples. Likely a similar gap in classiness. You're welcome Rusty Duggan)

you heartless S.O.B. David S is not David Staples? why would you go a ruin that for us?

next thing you will be trying to tell me is santa isnt real

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#62 baggedmilk
June 10 2010, 03:29PM
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rubbertrout wrote:

To say nothing of Rusty Duggan. How I love Fridays at JSBM's site . . .

*silently damns the moderators

NSFW at JSBM are a glorious thing aren't they? Lil' John YEeeeeeaaaaahhhhhh

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#63 David S
June 10 2010, 04:05PM
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Poo Czar wrote:

I believe you're thinking about Admiral Rusty Shackleford.

(side note: David S is not David Staples. Likely a similar gap in classiness. You're welcome Rusty Duggan)

*Checks online calendar*

Holy crap! TOMORROW IS FRIDAY!!!

C'mon Rusty you drunk. Don't let us down!

...What?

*Smokebomb*

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#64 David S
June 10 2010, 04:10PM
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cableguy - 2nd Tier Fan wrote:

you heartless S.O.B. David S is not David Staples? why would you go a ruin that for us?

next thing you will be trying to tell me is santa isnt real

Yes, its true. David Staples posts comments using his full name.

He's also a famous writer guy (although not quite as famous as Brownleee - obviously-duh!). Me? I might be a bot. Or not. Heh heh.

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#65 Mouse
June 10 2010, 05:21PM
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David S wrote:

How hung over must Kane be right now? How many fat chicks are sleeping it off in his limo? How many homeless people did Pronger kicks last night? And how crappy does Leighton feel this morning?

These are the things I want to know.

Pronger feels ok, it's no skin off his back. The local weather girl, on the other hand, not so much...

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#66 marcus
June 10 2010, 05:28PM
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How much ransom would Kipper get from Philly? Anything outside of Richards me thinks. lol

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#67 Chris.
June 10 2010, 05:29PM
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Pat Kane should have skated over to the net, dug out the overtime winning puck, and given it to Pronger in front of the world... Too bad his good judgment was clouded over with untamed joy...

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#68 Matt Henderson
June 10 2010, 05:32PM
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marcus wrote:

How much ransom would Kipper get from Philly? Anything outside of Richards me thinks. lol

~?

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#69 Milli
June 10 2010, 06:35PM
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Chris. wrote:

Pat Kane should have skated over to the net, dug out the overtime winning puck, and given it to Pronger in front of the world... Too bad his good judgment was clouded over with untamed joy...

That would have beed hilarious!!!! Well, it's over, and man do I hope we are the next "chicago"

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#70 Max Powers - Team HME Evans
June 12 2010, 06:09AM
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jeanshorts wrote:

DEY TUK ER JAAYBS!!!!!!!

drrrr trrrk rrr jeeerrrrrbssss! trrrkrrrjrrrbs.

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