PHOTOSHOP CONTEST III: WHAT IF

Wanye
September 12 2011 06:39PM

Last week was a sombre time for many folks. Between the horrific KHL plane crash and the 10th anniversary of 9/11 it didn't seem quite the time to have a good laugh at the expense of others. But this Monday brings the start of a new week and a return to normalcy.

Others: prepare to be laughed at.

Heartily.

We have made the executive decision to include two entries above as automatic finalists and we have whittled down the entries to these other 10. So set your phasers to fun - and tell us your fave 3 entries in the comments. 

It's time to figure out the finalists for the photoshop contest.

BONSIGNORE STATUE

It might be hard to see in the photo but smashing Bonsignore's face onto the Gretzky statue is quite hilarious. What if Sather and Jason B had been able to see eye to eye? What if a man paid millions of dollars to coddle millionaire teenagers had been able to do his job and draw productive play from his top draft picks?

Imagine where we could be.

COLEMAN-HALL-BROWNLEE

The author of this photo said in his email 'we could call it something like what if Coleman waited until 2011 to visit the Oilers dressing room?" Good enough for us - the photo is tight.

Massive bonus points for Brownlee lurking behind The Gary. Points deduced for scale because how small would Brownlee have to be to be shorter than Coleman?   No no no. This doesn't look to scale at all.

Classic.

HALL WINS THE CUP: I

Two different entries decided to show an alternate outcome of the 2010 Entry Draft. What if the Oil had picked Seguin and Hall went to the Bruins instead? Would Beantown still have won the Cup? Almost decidedly so as Seguin didn't do much in the playoffs and he got a ring out of the deal.

We will feel for #4 in this entry and say the kid would be up one Cup if the Oil hadn't picked him first, but he would be down the adoration of a City. 

Cause Chara owns Boston and everyone knows that.*

HALL WINS THE CUP: II

Last pic we felt for Hall. Now we go after him. You want to win a Cup Taylor Hall? Well you had better wrap your brain around doing it in an Oilers jersey because we are going to sign you longer than DiPietro when the hour draws near.

You will be re-signed to a contract that won't expire until the next Mayan Calendar flips around and the new Downtown arena is being torn down to make way for Rexall Place III.

So don't even look at this happy picture of you winning a cup in a non-Oilers jersey. Cause that ain't gonna happen Buster. You are going to win one as an Edmonton Oiler or you will retire a multi-multi-millionaire whether you like it or not.**

HOPE = REALITY

The Young Guns holding the Cup above their head hits us square in the heartbox. Look how happy Eberle is in this picture. He is totally scoring with a lady THAT night. Believe that.

PENNER LOVE HOT DOGZ

Holy effing eff. Obviously this is one of the funniest things we have ever seen and the photoshopping is spotless. We had developed a soft spot for Penner right before he left town. But now that he is an LA King it seems he has traded in his love of donairs for a love of hot dogs.

Eat up you overall wearing monster. Plenty more where that came from.

NUGENT-MUSCLES-HOPKINS

Look at them titties!** Oh Nuge, if only this were the case. Good luck in camp by the by. Solid entry.

PETERSEN-ROLOSON

We don't quite follow what this picture is referring to but the amended coaching history of Craig MacTavish and the prominent Nation logo had us at hello.

ROLOSON WAY

The damn heading is so spot on. What if they hadn't dressed that little weasel? From the looks of the picture the Oilers winning the 2006 Stanley Cup had the unintended side effect of blacking out all of the stars in the night time sky. Sweet!

SCHLEP BROS

A scathing indictment of the Oilers Brass has never looked so good in an argyle sweater. From the guys who almost brought you hossa indeed. Very well played.

PRIZIE-WIZIES

As you let us know who your favourite 3 finalists are remember that the winner of this contest shall receive Oodle Noodle lunch for 10 to his or her work assuming he or she works in Edmonton and surrounding area. If the winner doesn't live in that specific metropolitan trade area, they can still win.

It just might be a prize we find lying about Wanye Manor including but not limited to "Jordan Eberle pennant currently hanging on wall," "empty pizza box," "final notice bill from Shaw" or many other great prizes. How happy you will be!

Top 3 entries Nation. Let's have at 'er!

FOOTNOTES

*does he actually though? Could anyone love that gentle giant?

** Maybe even a mulit-multi-multi-millionaire. Depends on inflation.

*** That's what he said

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#51 rubbertrout
September 13 2011, 08:25AM
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1. Coleman Hall Brownlee -For no other reason than the CIA level of photoshopping skills. That is seamless! I would not like its creator to have access to my likeness.

2. Lauren Pronger -Just 'cause

3. Penner -Here's to you ya big donair eating waste of talent!

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#52 book¡e
September 13 2011, 08:29AM
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Robin Brownlee wrote:

I DIDN'T AUTHORIZE USE OF MY LIKENESS IN THIS STUPID CONTEST AND IT'S CAUSED ME UNTOLD MENTAL ANGUISH. WANYE, YOU'LL HEAR FROM MY LAWYER, YOU F%$#ING KNUCKLEHEAD. "WHAT IF" I SUED YOUR ASS OFF, SMART GUY? HUH? WHAT?

I am pretty sure Brownlee's post counts as a vote for Coleman - Hall - Brownlee

just saying...

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#53 RDS
September 13 2011, 08:52AM
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1. Penner

2. Schlepp

3. Hall's face on Messier's body = hilarious

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#54 BArmstrong
September 13 2011, 09:07AM
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book¡e wrote:

OK speaking of Dustin Penner and Hot Dog Eating Contests

Check this out.

http://blogs.wickedlocal.com/blog/2009/01/22/its-never-the-fat-guys-who-win-these-things/#axzz1XqFKSHSa

Proof that Penner truly did have a promising career as a Hot Dog Eating Champion. He was already dominating the Crepe Eating Circuit. It's too bad he gave it up to become a Los Angles King.

Wow - that could be Penner.

Maybe that pic isn't photoshopped?

Nope - it is. Dale Boone

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#55 The Towel Boy
September 13 2011, 09:09AM
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Robin Brownlee wrote:

I DIDN'T AUTHORIZE USE OF MY LIKENESS IN THIS STUPID CONTEST AND IT'S CAUSED ME UNTOLD MENTAL ANGUISH. WANYE, YOU'LL HEAR FROM MY LAWYER, YOU F%$#ING KNUCKLEHEAD. "WHAT IF" I SUED YOUR ASS OFF, SMART GUY? HUH? WHAT?

All caps Brownlee is WAY scarier than lower case Brownlee. I didn't think that was possible.

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#56 geoilersgist
September 13 2011, 09:11AM
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lauren pronger coleman-hall-brownlee penner and his hotdogs

haha they all are great, makes me wish i was useful with photoshop...

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#57 Redfern
September 13 2011, 09:12AM
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1. Penner

2. Penner

3. Penner

By far the funniest and most realistic. I actually think that's real! I mean, it all makes perfect sense now.

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#58 Buke
September 13 2011, 09:21AM
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1. Penner Love Hot Dogz 2. Roloson Way 3. Coleman-Hall-Brownlee

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#59 kyuss
September 13 2011, 10:10AM
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1) Penner vs Hotdog

2) Schlepp Bros

3) Roloson Way

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#60 David S
September 13 2011, 10:47AM
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Penner

/thread

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#61 Chickenplucker
September 13 2011, 11:03AM
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Penner

Schlepp Brothers

Lauren-zilla

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#62 smiliegirl15
September 13 2011, 11:33AM
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Prongzilla is my favourite.

Bonsignore is a pretty good job and the most far-fetched.

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#63 David S
September 13 2011, 11:51AM
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Does anybody here find it disturbing that Penner is probably going to win and the prize is craploads of yummy @oodle_noodle* food?

*Oh right. That doesn't work here.

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#64 Ninjai
September 13 2011, 12:02PM
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1. Penner Love Hot Dogz - Photoshop magic, Penner's slobbery face

2. HOPE = Reality - Forecast? Simply voted for Bettman's smug face

3. Roloson Way - Damn you MAB... DAMN YOU...

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#65 Sheldon Oilers Fan for Life!!!
September 13 2011, 12:14PM
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1. Penner Nice PS work!!! Very Fitting! 2. Coleman Just Funny! 3. Hope That micro Bettman is ROFL

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#66 Clyde Frog
September 13 2011, 04:20PM
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1. Penner 2. Penner (Its a big picture) 3. Penner (Sooo many hotdogs... mmm delicious)

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#67 Lawndemon
September 13 2011, 04:28PM
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1 - Penner 2 - Schlep 3 - Pronger

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#68 Jamie B.
September 14 2011, 01:29AM
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1. Hope = Reality

2. Lauren Pronger

3. Schlep Brothers

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#69 Dustin Terpstra
September 14 2011, 06:59PM
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1. Penner 2. Schlepp 3. Roloson Way

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#70 Dustin Terpstra
September 14 2011, 07:04PM
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1. Penner 2. Schlepp 3. Roloson Way

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#71 Fake Cheating Voter voting multiple times under various anonymous names
September 14 2011, 07:11PM
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1. Schlep 2. Pronger (because it's allready in) 3. Fill in Random Vote to prevent detection.

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