GDB 78.0: KING FOR A DAY

Wanye
March 30 2012 12:01PM

So the Oilers play the LA Kings tonight in another meaningless game do they? And Gregor is doing married guy stuff before his show and asked us to write the GDB on his behalf? How will we live with the pressure of trying to describe a game that will be forgotten by 99% of us within days?

Fingers and brain don't fail us now!*

BETTER THAN NOTHING

A great many folks have done a great many things in the name of "better than nothing." Say you are the unfortunate fellow in the picture above. You say to your wife "Honey, now that the kids are grown up and have left the house we should get a pet! How about a Golden Retriever?"

When the wife strolls in with two spider monkeys and digs up boxes of old childeren's clothing from the basement you quickly come to the sobering realization that the dog you wanted probably isn't on its way. But do you shun the creepy little buggers? No. You dress them up in the family's finest and grimace your way through a series of photos at the local Walmart.

You know why?

Because it's better than nothing.

BETTER THAN NOTHING 2

Now what if you are this little girl? Your parents have set up the video camera and on the eve of Santa's arrival you get to open an early Christmas present. Little would you know that they watch the Jimmy Kimmel show and he has put out a challenge to viewers to give their kids crappy Christmas presents and video their reactions.

How are you to know that Christmas has turned from a joyous day for Children into a joyous day for Jimmy Kimmel and his burning desire to ruin everything?  As this big Chicago Bears fan opens up a Packers jersey and promptly flips her Dad the Christmas Bird, we can see that in some cases something is definitely not better than nothing.

WHAT'S IT GONNA BE?

So Oilers what's it gonna be tonight? We will be tuning into the game from beginning to end despite the fact it is Friday night, there are a myriad of other things to do and we know this game doesn't exactly mean the world to you.

Jason Strudwick described this in gory detail in his earlier article and we can't help but ask ourselves how we are supposed to find inspiration to watch the game when the millionaires collecting bags of cash can't be bothered to get amped up themselves.

But tune in we will. Why? Because it is better than nothing. Even the worst Oilers game in history is better than nothing. Even a 1-0 shutout loss to some awful team on a Sunday afternoon is better than nothing. Even a pre-season game between split squads of the Oilers and the Columbus Blue Jackets is better than nothing.

And in a few short weeks that is exactly what we will be left with. Nothing.

So go Oilers. Snipe a few would ya?

LINEUPS, TENDER AND SCRATCHES

According to the Oilers twitter feed the scratches tonight are Belanger, Omark, Barker, Petrell and Fedun. More information to follow as it becomes available. Linus Omark also tweeted the message above which suggests he is either confused by something or the question mark key on his Blackberry is stuck. More information on that too should we find out more.

MORE

Apparently Linus Omark didn't tweet about a hundred frustrated question marks because he found out he is a healthy scratch tonight. Even though he tweeted it right around the time he would have been finding out the bad news. We can safely make this conclusion because he tweeted in his charming way that we are all wrong if that's what we all thought.

Ha ha! Jokes on us right Linus? And you thought he was on a different page than Oilers management. Scratch that kind of thinking you negative nelly.

*That's obviously what she said

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#101 Wax Man Riley
March 31 2012, 02:52AM
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And just for fun:

Iginla, Calgary Flames' superstar: 78GP, 31-33-64 34yrs old

Eberle. Edmonton Oilers' 2nd year draft pick: 73GP, 32-41-73 21yrs old

Eat Sh!t Flames!

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#102 pelhem grenville
March 31 2012, 04:27AM
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...didn't watch the game

why didn't PRV play? some call up fiasco?

did someone say there was an incompetence issue with the clubs' management????????????

nah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

edit...a hundred & fist comment

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#103 sizedoesmatter
March 31 2012, 04:58AM
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Four games to play,Tickets to some tropical Island booked.Easy to see why the slow start.The kings are playing sutter hockey boring but effective sutter hockey.Next year the games will have more meaning for the Oilers so There should be a better result.

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#104 Archaeologuy
March 31 2012, 08:32AM
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@pelhem grenville

Oilers only allowed 4 call-ups. Paajarvi would have been 5 because they did a paper transaction a little while ago.

Basicly the Oilers get confused counting to 4 and go to 5. Pretty much basic incompetence.

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#105 pelhem grenville
March 31 2012, 08:42AM
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Archaeologuy wrote:

Oilers only allowed 4 call-ups. Paajarvi would have been 5 because they did a paper transaction a little while ago.

Basicly the Oilers get confused counting to 4 and go to 5. Pretty much basic incompetence.

basic incompetence?

oh my when did that start?

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#106 pelhem grenville
March 31 2012, 08:50AM
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pssst Arch...seeing as how you & me are the only ones on the interweb right now ... tell me ...didya see the monkeys' penis? i didn't see it at all and now it's been all blue patched...didn't notice anything 'cept the Cathy Bates look-a-like...

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#107 Oilcruzer
March 31 2012, 09:47AM
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Archaeologuy wrote:

Oilers only allowed 4 call-ups. Paajarvi would have been 5 because they did a paper transaction a little while ago.

Basicly the Oilers get confused counting to 4 and go to 5. Pretty much basic incompetence.

Seriously? SERIOUSLY???

Do we have confirmation on that? Cuz if that's confirmed...

*ready to snap*

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#108 Archaeologuy
March 31 2012, 10:05AM
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@pelhem grenville

I did see it but I questioned if that's what I was seeing until Wanye confirmed it. It was serious Wang.

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#109 Archaeologuy
March 31 2012, 10:05AM
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@Oilcruzer

Confirmed by Dan Tencer of all people. Of course he didn't use words like "incompetence"

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#110 pelhem grenville
March 31 2012, 11:10AM
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@Arch...is this on our coach or our GM...

gawd i thought Renney could count at least...i know the other guy can't

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#111 Archaeologuy
March 31 2012, 11:20AM
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@pelhem grenville

GM and Assistant GM. Rick Olcyk should have known this stuff. Not his first call-up/waiver mix-up.

It all has to do with them calling Paajarvi up and sending him back on paper a little while ago so he was eligible to play for OKC in the playoffs.

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#112 Wanyes bastard child
March 31 2012, 11:33AM
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And then shall thou count to 4. 2 and 3 are ok providing you are proceeding to 4, 5 is to many and 6 is plain idiotic!

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#113 Bryzarro World
March 31 2012, 11:55AM
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One can clearly see that current management can't be trusted to run this org. From tambo to big O to Klowe. First two should have known and what Klowe said about O is even more troubling! If he thinks O is doin an impeccable job it goes to show his judge of competency is completly off.

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#114 Pucker
March 31 2012, 11:55AM
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Went to the game. if not before, all enthusiasm died 52 seconds in - for the crowd and on the Oiler's bench. . What a waste of 5 hours of my time. Pretty good exodus after the 50/50.

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#115 Bryzarro World
March 31 2012, 11:57AM
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Wanyes bastard child wrote:

And then shall thou count to 4. 2 and 3 are ok providing you are proceeding to 4, 5 is to many and 6 is plain idiotic!

Time to pull out the Holy Hand Grenade and blow this mofo up

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#116 Bryzarro World
March 31 2012, 11:57AM
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Wanyes bastard child wrote:

And then shall thou count to 4. 2 and 3 are ok providing you are proceeding to 4, 5 is to many and 6 is plain idiotic!

Oops

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#117 Wax Man Riley
March 31 2012, 12:14PM
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SiD wrote:

Detroit Red Wings:

“Hello, Oilers fans, look at your team, now back to me, now back at your team, now back to me. Sadly, they are not me, but if they switched to a mix of grit and skill, they could look like they're me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re at the game watching a team your team could look like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s a ticket to the Stanley cup finals. Look again, the ticket is now celebratory beverages after winning the cup, Anything is possible when your team switches to a mix of good skill and grit, and not the undersized team of today, I'm on a horse.”

I liked it!

Wax Stamp of Approval!

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#118 Oilcruzer
March 31 2012, 01:29PM
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Archaeologuy wrote:

Confirmed by Dan Tencer of all people. Of course he didn't use words like "incompetence"

(that explains why I didn't hear it)

Thanks!

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