GDB 15.0: RED WINGS

Wanye
November 02 2013 01:09PM

 

Jason Gregor texted me to say "I have baby business to attend to on Saturday. Gregor 2,0 is only weeks away. I will need you to write the GDB for the Red Wings game." "Me?" we replied "last time I wrote a GDB people said it was silly and cried for you to write every one until 2099."

Well one doesn't argue with Jason Gregor if one hopes to be alive for the next Oilers win. So here goes nothing.

AND SO IT CONTINUES

How many ways are there to say that the Oilers rebuild is taking longer than it took to rebuild Europe after WWII?  At some point we start to scramble for new acronyms making a chase for last place an exciting proposition.

After the pantsing the Leafs gave the Oil on Tuesday - in front of LeafsNation Steve Dangle who had flown in for the match no less - it is hard to make bold predictions of Oilers wins. We sat there at Rexall Place, next to the King of all Maple Leafs fans watching them cheer and smile and raise their fists in triumph. We want that so badly for all our fellow Oilers fans it hurts.

Yes, if you told us "Wanye, all you have to do is get hit by a car and the Oil will turn around quick as a flash" we would run screaming from Wanye Manor and get hit square by the first motorcar we happened to see. Sadly it ain't that easy. But there are still things we can do as Oilers fans to try and turn the ship around.

In fact we have an idea.

AN IDEA

We hockey fans are a superstitious lot. Lucky underwear, lucky beer brand, lucky type of fur coat deodorizer. Cheering from the same seat on the couch. We all have some little foible we cling to in the hopes it makes our beloved Oilers win. Well Nation whatever we are doing is wrong.

We need to collectively reboot our lucky charms and send a wave of new karma out into the universe. Rather than focusing on what we don't want - more losses, more injuries, more Grebeshkovs in the lineup - we need to take new actions focused on what we want.

Wins.

Pictured at the top of the article is our most prized possession - our Eberle jersey purchased minutes after 14 scored his mind shattering first goal in the NHL. Thinking it was lucky we haven't so much as cleaned it once in the 4 years since. At the quarter pole of his 5th season it is clear the luck ain't working.

So we took the jersey to the cleaners on Thursday and got it back clean as clean can be. This was our major good luck charm these past 4 years and we wouldn't dream of doing this normally. But drastic times call for drastic measures. We invite you to reconsider whatever lucky charms you have and bring new ones out. The team needs it Nation. It's the only thing left we can think of doing.

Let us know if you think of anything you can do to reboot the franchise's luck. Burn your lucky drawers. Switch brands of game day beer. Remarry a new luckier wife if you think it will help. Just do something positive that is a break with the past.

We beg you.

LINEUP - GOOD

 

According to DailyFaceOff.com the Oilers are icing the forward corps above and the defensive pairings below. And according to the very same site Bachman will get the start in between the pipes tonight.

LINEUP - BAD

 

Forwards up, defense below and something called a Petr Mrazek will be tending for the Wings tonight. Poor bugger won't even have a chance. 

 

PREDICTIONS R US

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Oilers win 4-2 shocking many including the Oilers themselves.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: During the second intermission Coack Babcock screams at Mrazek to step his game up to which the goalie tearfully replies "I don't even know who I am. WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DID YOU START ME IN AN NHL GAME?"

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Hearing about the jersey cleaning Jordan Eberle pots a pair of goals. In the post game scrum he comments "I knew something was holding me back this year. Here all this time it was a ratty jersey covered in shots of Jack Daniels from the Pint. I wish Wanye had gotten his hygenic act together years ago."

Hearing my name mentioned by King Jordan I immediately transcend into a beam of pure joy and shoot into space.

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#251 dougtheslug
November 02 2013, 11:14PM
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Something died inside of me tonight. I was at the game and left after the second period. The worst Oiler performance I've ever seen, and seen a lot over the past 35 years. Walking back through the blizzard, I really felt I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of caring more than the team does. I'm feeling more sad than angry, though. I think maybe it's just time to move on.

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#252 Time Travelling Sean
November 02 2013, 11:16PM
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Fresh Mess wrote:

He's texting his agent saying "get me out of this hellhole YESTERDAY!"

He's part of this hellhole...He's part of this culture, he's part of the on-ice product.

He shouldn't be so aloof/apathetic/lackadaisical about this mess he's the center of.

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#253 FIREEAKINS
November 02 2013, 11:19PM
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Why is everyone ripping on Hall? He's not even playing. Hall is one of the only ones on this team that plays with heart. Taylor Hall is not the problem. He's far from it. If you can't see that than sorry, but you are an idiot.

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#254 FireKLowe
November 02 2013, 11:21PM
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Dan 1919 wrote:

I saw some positive signs in tonight's game. Just kidding, I didn't.

I'm sure JW and the rest of the homies from EJ will find positives ...

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#255 DSF
November 02 2013, 11:25PM
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Eakins is done.

Just a matter of time.

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#256 Btk1979
November 02 2013, 11:27PM
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We might as well get used to praying for Connor McDavid in two years.

http://www.eliteprospects.com/player.php?player=183442

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#257 Todd
November 02 2013, 11:29PM
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Phil wrote:

Use Rexall pharmacy bags instead!

That would be money... Fans start showing up at the games not wearing paper bags on their heads, but Rexall branded bags.

Maybe Katz would finally start firing his 80s buddies if his precious 'brand' starting taking a hit.

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#258 Sammy
November 02 2013, 11:31PM
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dougtheslug wrote:

Something died inside of me tonight. I was at the game and left after the second period. The worst Oiler performance I've ever seen, and seen a lot over the past 35 years. Walking back through the blizzard, I really felt I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of caring more than the team does. I'm feeling more sad than angry, though. I think maybe it's just time to move on.

I feel your pain Doug. I actually found myself laughing after the last couple of wings goals. It may have been have been the rye talking but I just don't care anymore. How sad is that 6 rings!!!!

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#259 Cubsfan
November 02 2013, 11:31PM
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just tuned into 630 to listen to Stauffer and even Brown being Oiler apologists.....that schtick's getting old too......what a difference an employer makes.......

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#260 Smokey
November 02 2013, 11:33PM
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Its Taylor Hall's fault the sky is falling cause he's texting on the phone and eating a hotdog. Why the hell is he eating hotdogs anyways. Its all his damn fault. If he really cared about us Oilers fans he'd be eating ricecakes and greatfruits while riding the exercise bike on the highest resistance at full tilt. Its all his damn fault we are loosing...Trade him for the rights to Peter Ing and Jim Korn and Mike Palmateer.

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#261 6Rings
November 02 2013, 11:36PM
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That was unwatchable but I watched it all. Absolutely abysmal. Pathetic. Totally unprofessional effort. Where the hell is the compete? The try?

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#262 **
November 02 2013, 11:40PM
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** wrote:

this game is going to be an Oil massacre.

Well I called it. IT was just sad to see how they just seemed to give up. It's going to be a looooooooooooong season.

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#263 rectal place
November 02 2013, 11:40PM
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Smokey wrote:

Its Taylor Hall's fault the sky is falling cause he's texting on the phone and eating a hotdog. Why the hell is he eating hotdogs anyways. Its all his damn fault. If he really cared about us Oilers fans he'd be eating ricecakes and greatfruits while riding the exercise bike on the highest resistance at full tilt. Its all his damn fault we are loosing...Trade him for the rights to Peter Ing and Jim Korn and Mike Palmateer.

Grapefruit and losing would be the words you were looking for.

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#264 Sam Reinhart
November 02 2013, 11:41PM
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Mr. MacTavish, please don't draft me.

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#265 FIRE ALL BOYS ON THE BUS
November 02 2013, 11:42PM
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Todd wrote:

@WANYE - For the next photoshop contest.

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

What a joke.... No words. I did see this link before the game and it made me laugh. Maybe we all need a laugh (at Kevin Lowe's expense)

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

good work by whoever made this...

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#266 Smokey
November 02 2013, 11:44PM
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rectal place wrote:

Grapefruit and losing would be the words you were looking for.

Thanx Anil boy. Its Tayler Hall fault I ain't spel to gud to.

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#267 Alsker
November 02 2013, 11:48PM
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dougtheslug wrote:

Something died inside of me tonight. I was at the game and left after the second period. The worst Oiler performance I've ever seen, and seen a lot over the past 35 years. Walking back through the blizzard, I really felt I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of caring more than the team does. I'm feeling more sad than angry, though. I think maybe it's just time to move on.

Man do I feel your pain and conflict. Been there done that, wether a sports team/employer, its all the same. You want to make it better but a) how can you b) why should you care more than those who can do something....you can only hope that kBlowe and friends feel even worse when they get belittled in public for the pain they have inflicted on you and others like us.

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#268 rectal place
November 02 2013, 11:50PM
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Smokey wrote:

Thanx Anil boy. Its Tayler Hall fault I ain't spel to gud to.

Anil man. And you're welcome.

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#269 madjam
November 02 2013, 11:53PM
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I see a lot of positives from this game . We are positively not a contender nor are we good enough anymore to even be a pretender . We are positively a bad hockey club . Positive is making your hockey picks on lotteries another Oiler loss - that's beneficial . They positively had a legitimate shot at next years NBR.1 pick . They now look like they are a fair weather team - to bad it snowed today . Second verse , same as the first , as far as next stage of continuous rebuild . That's a lot of positives . Some times no change is good - at least we know what to expect ?

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#270 Quinn the Eskimo
November 02 2013, 11:54PM
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FIRE ALL BOYS ON THE BUS wrote:

What a joke.... No words. I did see this link before the game and it made me laugh. Maybe we all need a laugh (at Kevin Lowe's expense)

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

good work by whoever made this...

The one laugh from the night. Listening to Strudwick right now. Ghastly. I'll be puking Blue, White and Sh!t Orange for the next 5 months.

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#271 Johnnydapunk
November 03 2013, 12:26AM
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Did you ever get the feeling you've been cheated....

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#272 FIREEAKINS
November 03 2013, 12:28AM
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Now that Horcoff is gone people have to find a new player to blame. What I don't understand is the player you people pick to blame. Taylor Hall is the best player on this team. He plays hard and with his heart. Idiots. Dallas Eakins is problem #1, his "systems" are f u c k i n g terrible. All the other NHL proven coaches must laugh at this goon.

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#273 Naky
November 03 2013, 12:35AM
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I'd almost rather forfeit all the games then have to watch this crap every other night. If you're not gonna put in any effort when you play, you may as well be honest about it up front and just wave the white flag without even trying.

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#274 Smokey
November 03 2013, 12:36AM
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After the second goal, I told my wife the games over. She looked puzzled thinking your sure given up easy. I told there is no fight left. You gotta change the culture of losing from the top down. Its the only answer.

I said I hope this team looses 9-0 because maybe there might be enough outcry to get rid of Lowe and MacT.

The reason there is not 500 posts is fans are starting to stop caring. There should be at least that many post calling for Lowe's head.

If they fire Lowe tonight, I'll buy tickets tomorrow. I'm not supporting this culture of losing this year. Maybe if we had 500 posts saying the same thing maybe we'd get somewhere.

Dump Lowe, reassign MacT, send Eakins to OKC. Bring in Nelson to develop these kids. Hell I'd even sign Sutter, cough cough, to coach this team to play better defensively and teach these kids to play proper systematic hockey. If you don't salvage what's left of this year, next year will be the same.

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#275 Yaz
November 03 2013, 12:38AM
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Circle Nov 16th on the calendar, HNIC and we're in Calgary. By then we'll be something like 3/16/2 and will get spanked again. If that doesn't get the good old boys network fired nothing ever will. There are no fixes out there, the coaches have long since lost the room and we've succeeded in turning our young guns into someone nobody will trade for. We're so screwed and nobody can fix it anytime soon. I am just so damn disappointed with this mess.

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#276 6 ring circus
November 03 2013, 12:46AM
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Is it to late to ask for a refund on my season tickets?

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#277 DCC
November 03 2013, 12:47AM
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6Rings wrote:

That was unwatchable but I watched it all. Absolutely abysmal. Pathetic. Totally unprofessional effort. Where the hell is the compete? The try?

If memory serves we were promised "compete" this year, if nothing else. Once again the Edmonton Oilers over-promise and under-deliver.

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#278 DCC
November 03 2013, 12:52AM
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@rectal place

Love your name....anyone that enters that building is getting bent over.

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#279 Buzz
November 03 2013, 01:01AM
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6 ring circus wrote:

Is it to late to ask for a refund on my season tickets?

No. But I'll wager you'll look twice at that invoice before you plop down any more ticket money into Katz' sweaty little palm next spring.

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#280 peppran
November 03 2013, 01:05AM
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Oldboys club wont trade "the future"...the future looks bright..i wont even play nhl14 with this team:-)

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#281 Zarny
November 03 2013, 01:06AM
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I'm sorry but the panic is funny.

The team is struggling and the solution is to get rid of a guy who hasn't played since '98?

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#282 Greg
November 03 2013, 01:09AM
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it's getting bad when inside, you find yourself cheering for the other team. just so we as fans can prove our point.

i'll cry myself to sleep tonight, and i wont be using tissues from Rexall... Viva la Shoppers Drug Mart!

Oh, and i almost forgot.

FIRE KEVIN LOWE!

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#283 Serious Gord
November 03 2013, 01:15AM
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Zarny wrote:

I'm sorry but the panic is funny.

The team is struggling and the solution is to get rid of a guy who hasn't played since '98?

Firing Lowe will be the beginning of the road back to respectability and then winning and then the playoffs and then the cup.

A message has to be sent.

No more cronies

No more old boys

No more pals of the owner running the team.

The buck stops at Lowe and what happened tonight was a fireable offense.

Meanwhile Eakins is on the bubble. Either the team gets playing as a team and the on ice discipline tightens up and the effort - the effort Eakins promised would be second to none - is there, he will not coach another home game if MacT has the sense that he didn't have when he made the rash (bold?) move of hiring him.

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#284 Buzz
November 03 2013, 01:22AM
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FireKLowe wrote:

I'm sure JW and the rest of the homies from EJ will find positives ...

Just got up to change my ATTENDS(plum full they were too). I read David Staples article in the EJ.

'FireKLowe' blogged above that the writers at EJ and the ESun imo would put a positive spin on the situation. Well, props to Staples. He, like Brownlee called it as they saw it. They both put the blame directly on the Katz/Lowe brainfart school of business.

A short read but Staples hit the proverbial nail on the head.

Katz and the 'Boys on the bus' need to go away.

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#285 Buzz
November 03 2013, 01:27AM
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Speaking of the Boys on the bus, didn't I just read somewhere that Katz and Lowe made room for Messire at the trough er...Rexall sports?

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#286 Headberg
November 03 2013, 01:54AM
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First time posting, follower of many years. Just felt like I finally needed to throw my 2 cents into the ring. Didn't follow the game tonight, intentionally, and by the look of things, boy am I glad. It feels great. Growing up on the Oilers religiously since the days of the Cape Breton Oilers, yes I am from Cape Breton, despite their deplorable performance in recent years, I have never felt as compelled to give them the middle finger as I currently do. I am proud that I was able to resist the urge of watching yet another gong show this evening, and nor do I intend on watching another game this season. Some might argue that I am misguided, but I feel as though I am a leading example, illustrating that the BS during the past 20 years, minus '06, is not acceptable, and I will not stand for it any longer. I've suffered long enough as a passionate loyal fan, receiving the brunt of jokes for many years, and I am done with this joke of a franchise until they become relevant again. Katz will receive no revenue from me any more, until this team demonstrates that they actually care about winning. I am done, and I leave with a big middle finger stuck strait up, pointing at the Oilers for all the lies and the complete indifference towards respectability. They do not deserve me as a fan, screw them.

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#287 Headberg
November 03 2013, 01:01AM
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First time posting, follower of many years. Just felt like I finally needed to throw my 2 cents into the ring. Didn't follow the game tonight, intentionally, and by the look of things, boy am I glad. It feels great. Growing up on the Oilers religiously since the days of the Cape Breton Oilers, yes I am from Cape Breton, despite their deplorable performance in recent years, I have never felt as compelled to give them the middle finger as I currently do. I am proud that I was able to resist the urge of watching yet another gong show this evening, and nor do I intend on watching another game this season. Some might argue that I am misguided, but I feel as though I am a leading example, illustrating that the BS during the past 20 years, minus '06, is not acceptable, and I will not stand for it any longer. I've suffered long enough as a passionate loyal fan, receiving the brunt of jokes for many years, and I am done with this joke of a franchise until they become relevant again. Katz will receive no revenue from me any more, until this team demonstrates that they actually care about winning. I am done, and I leave with a big middle finger stuck strait up, pointing at the Oilers for all the lies and the complete indifference towards respectability. They do not deserve me as a fan, screw them.

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#288 Coco crisp
November 03 2013, 01:33AM
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This organisation is wack as f

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#289 bazmagoo
November 03 2013, 01:41AM
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The players are rebelling against Eakins, another Kevin Lowe decision that has ruined another season.

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#290 Lars Eller
November 03 2013, 02:16AM
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Enuff said...I say no more

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#291 bwar
November 03 2013, 02:22AM
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bwar wrote:

Wayne can you please write every GDB? This made my day.
I think Gregor has been the Oilers unlucky charm. 5-0 Oil. Eberle gets all five and Wayne wins $1,000,000 via Safeway Score and Win. Which he immediately invests the winnings in dry cleaning gift cards to ensure his jersey is never dirty again.

Guess I kind of had that score backwards.

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#292 Too Toxic To Continue
November 03 2013, 03:08AM
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Hey Mr. Lowe. I am here to inform you that there is a THIRD tier of fan... Former !!!

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#293 TDSM31
November 03 2013, 03:51AM
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Well, that was worth the 5 hour white knuckle drive back home to Chestermere...Oilers, you owe me my hour of daylight savings back, mutherf*ckers.

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#294 BLAKPOO
November 03 2013, 03:56AM
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Zarny wrote:

I'm sorry but the panic is funny.

The team is struggling and the solution is to get rid of a guy who hasn't played since '98?

I hear ya. I've tried to make this point before too, but it's hard to argue when the team looks so terrible.

There does need to be a shake up. This team's so apathetic right now, there needs to be some kind of catalyst to turn this ship around. Even the call-ups don't look like they want to make this team.

Time to do something. Anything.

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#295 TeddyTurnbuckle
November 03 2013, 04:27AM
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Man petry and Smid were terrible again. Trade these clowns, they are both supposed to be in their prime yet they suck.

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#296 hemi
November 03 2013, 05:03AM
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Like the vast majority of loyal Oil fans, I really am finding that this year has been the hardest to be supportive to the team. Drinking the Kool-Aid just doesn't do it anymore. Could this be the year that fans like me finally say the hell with it? Sure is starting to feel like that. Bloody depressing!

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#297 spliff
November 03 2013, 05:23AM
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MacKinnon from the Journal wrote " the fans do want to be entertained, do expect the costly visit to Rexall Place to be memorable, a showcase for emerging talent, if not always a winning experience."

100% true. The Oilers have sucked, with the exception of 2006, since 1993-94. Thats twenty years of mediocrity. This catastrophe isn't on Eakins, this mess is on Kevin Lowe, Howson and MacT, who have absolutely no idea what they are doing. All the fans want is a decent, competitive team that plays hard and has a reasonable shot at the playoffs each year. Lowe and his buddies have proven, time and time again, that they are not capable of doing this. Katz needs to get an experienced GM with a proven track record of success and fire Lowe, because his position is redundant anyways. If we get qualified people running the hockey ops, this franchise can get back on track. But Katz will have to fire his buddies.

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#298 Hemmercules
November 03 2013, 05:44AM
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I can't watch another season knowing the playoffs are out of the question. After one month they are done. So sad. I guess I just watch flames games the rest of the year and cheer against them. The oilers are ruining nhl hockey for me. How do you cheer for another team with any seriousness after being an oiler fan for 25 years.

Next comes the players only meeting. Followed by a few decent games and then back to the same old bucket of crap. Clean out the management and coaching staff and start over, again. Ference Looked like he was going to cry after that game, the leader of the team was lost for words and ready to break down. The oilers are at their lowest right now. How much further down can they be driven. So so sad.

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#299 Rod from Viking
November 03 2013, 06:24AM
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DCC wrote:

Love your name....anyone that enters that building is getting bent over.

And when you leave you feel like shi#.

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#300 Saskguy
November 03 2013, 06:30AM
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DSF wrote:

Eakins is done.

Just a matter of time.

I didn't agree with the last 2 coach firings, but I gotta say, I think he should have came in as Ralphs assistant. I just hope this dressing room Isn't beyond repair. If it helps make a trade send Yak and who ever has the poorest attitude amongst Ebs, Nuge and Hall. They really miss Perron when he's not in the line up... GRIT

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