GDB 15.0: RED WINGS

Wanye
November 02 2013 01:09PM

 

Jason Gregor texted me to say "I have baby business to attend to on Saturday. Gregor 2,0 is only weeks away. I will need you to write the GDB for the Red Wings game." "Me?" we replied "last time I wrote a GDB people said it was silly and cried for you to write every one until 2099."

Well one doesn't argue with Jason Gregor if one hopes to be alive for the next Oilers win. So here goes nothing.

AND SO IT CONTINUES

How many ways are there to say that the Oilers rebuild is taking longer than it took to rebuild Europe after WWII?  At some point we start to scramble for new acronyms making a chase for last place an exciting proposition.

After the pantsing the Leafs gave the Oil on Tuesday - in front of LeafsNation Steve Dangle who had flown in for the match no less - it is hard to make bold predictions of Oilers wins. We sat there at Rexall Place, next to the King of all Maple Leafs fans watching them cheer and smile and raise their fists in triumph. We want that so badly for all our fellow Oilers fans it hurts.

Yes, if you told us "Wanye, all you have to do is get hit by a car and the Oil will turn around quick as a flash" we would run screaming from Wanye Manor and get hit square by the first motorcar we happened to see. Sadly it ain't that easy. But there are still things we can do as Oilers fans to try and turn the ship around.

In fact we have an idea.

AN IDEA

We hockey fans are a superstitious lot. Lucky underwear, lucky beer brand, lucky type of fur coat deodorizer. Cheering from the same seat on the couch. We all have some little foible we cling to in the hopes it makes our beloved Oilers win. Well Nation whatever we are doing is wrong.

We need to collectively reboot our lucky charms and send a wave of new karma out into the universe. Rather than focusing on what we don't want - more losses, more injuries, more Grebeshkovs in the lineup - we need to take new actions focused on what we want.

Wins.

Pictured at the top of the article is our most prized possession - our Eberle jersey purchased minutes after 14 scored his mind shattering first goal in the NHL. Thinking it was lucky we haven't so much as cleaned it once in the 4 years since. At the quarter pole of his 5th season it is clear the luck ain't working.

So we took the jersey to the cleaners on Thursday and got it back clean as clean can be. This was our major good luck charm these past 4 years and we wouldn't dream of doing this normally. But drastic times call for drastic measures. We invite you to reconsider whatever lucky charms you have and bring new ones out. The team needs it Nation. It's the only thing left we can think of doing.

Let us know if you think of anything you can do to reboot the franchise's luck. Burn your lucky drawers. Switch brands of game day beer. Remarry a new luckier wife if you think it will help. Just do something positive that is a break with the past.

We beg you.

LINEUP - GOOD

 

According to DailyFaceOff.com the Oilers are icing the forward corps above and the defensive pairings below. And according to the very same site Bachman will get the start in between the pipes tonight.

LINEUP - BAD

 

Forwards up, defense below and something called a Petr Mrazek will be tending for the Wings tonight. Poor bugger won't even have a chance. 

 

PREDICTIONS R US

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Oilers win 4-2 shocking many including the Oilers themselves.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: During the second intermission Coack Babcock screams at Mrazek to step his game up to which the goalie tearfully replies "I don't even know who I am. WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DID YOU START ME IN AN NHL GAME?"

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Hearing about the jersey cleaning Jordan Eberle pots a pair of goals. In the post game scrum he comments "I knew something was holding me back this year. Here all this time it was a ratty jersey covered in shots of Jack Daniels from the Pint. I wish Wanye had gotten his hygenic act together years ago."

Hearing my name mentioned by King Jordan I immediately transcend into a beam of pure joy and shoot into space.

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#151 spawnlauncher
November 02 2013, 08:34PM
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Is there any way we can get NewAgeSys to coach the Oilers?

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#152 Outdoozguy
November 02 2013, 09:12PM
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THE OILERS SUCK!!! The organization is a disgrace.

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#153 Seriously
November 02 2013, 09:41PM
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Newj wrote:

I'm curious about what Tom Renney's thinking as he watches his Wings annhilate his former club?

I'm hoping he takes pity on us.

Oh I'm pretty sure he is counting his lucky stars that he has nothing to do with this s#!¥ show anymore!!!!!!

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#154 Sammy
November 02 2013, 10:26PM
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My only reason for watching the end of this game is the hope that it will turn into a sh!t show similar to the Philly game last night. Show some f#@kin heart oilers!!!!

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#155 Old Retired Guy (A.K.A. Die-Nasty)
November 02 2013, 10:28PM
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The culture of losing persists......no hits, no fights, no crashing the net, no emotion, no nothing......nothing from the coach....nobody on the bench even seems bothered ...should be interesting to what MacT has to say post game.

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#156 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 10:36PM
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@Gordie Wayne

TOTALLY disagree.

This is WAY better than Debrusk telling us how nice Eberle's hair looked earlier. And how Gordon won two consecutive faceoffs, so that's a GREAT sign.

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#157 WinterNightSky
November 02 2013, 11:04PM
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Gordie Wayne wrote:

The only thing worse than watching the Oilers get schooled by the Wings, is watching them with Rick Ball and Kelly Hrudey blathering on about how terrible the Oilers are...please tell us something we don't know...

Oh, and now Belov hurt...for f%^& sake.

I like this a lot better than Kevin Quinn and Louie DeBrusk blowing sunshine up our asses. It sounds like honesty.

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#158 Alsker
November 02 2013, 11:48PM
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dougtheslug wrote:

Something died inside of me tonight. I was at the game and left after the second period. The worst Oiler performance I've ever seen, and seen a lot over the past 35 years. Walking back through the blizzard, I really felt I can't do it anymore. I'm tired of caring more than the team does. I'm feeling more sad than angry, though. I think maybe it's just time to move on.

Man do I feel your pain and conflict. Been there done that, wether a sports team/employer, its all the same. You want to make it better but a) how can you b) why should you care more than those who can do something....you can only hope that kBlowe and friends feel even worse when they get belittled in public for the pain they have inflicted on you and others like us.

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#159 Serious Gord
November 03 2013, 01:15AM
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Zarny wrote:

I'm sorry but the panic is funny.

The team is struggling and the solution is to get rid of a guy who hasn't played since '98?

Firing Lowe will be the beginning of the road back to respectability and then winning and then the playoffs and then the cup.

A message has to be sent.

No more cronies

No more old boys

No more pals of the owner running the team.

The buck stops at Lowe and what happened tonight was a fireable offense.

Meanwhile Eakins is on the bubble. Either the team gets playing as a team and the on ice discipline tightens up and the effort - the effort Eakins promised would be second to none - is there, he will not coach another home game if MacT has the sense that he didn't have when he made the rash (bold?) move of hiring him.

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#160 spliff
November 03 2013, 05:23AM
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MacKinnon from the Journal wrote " the fans do want to be entertained, do expect the costly visit to Rexall Place to be memorable, a showcase for emerging talent, if not always a winning experience."

100% true. The Oilers have sucked, with the exception of 2006, since 1993-94. Thats twenty years of mediocrity. This catastrophe isn't on Eakins, this mess is on Kevin Lowe, Howson and MacT, who have absolutely no idea what they are doing. All the fans want is a decent, competitive team that plays hard and has a reasonable shot at the playoffs each year. Lowe and his buddies have proven, time and time again, that they are not capable of doing this. Katz needs to get an experienced GM with a proven track record of success and fire Lowe, because his position is redundant anyways. If we get qualified people running the hockey ops, this franchise can get back on track. But Katz will have to fire his buddies.

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#161 boxman
November 03 2013, 10:47AM
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Zarny wrote:

100% correct.

It's sad how many people wet their pants after one month.

Based on their career Octobers Iginla and Luongo wouldn't even be NHL players.

Zarny I think it is just wonderful that after remembering only one month of watching the Oilers you feel qualified to lecture people who have been ardent fans for years and years. I wish you would explain to the rest of us how to empty our heads so thoroughly that the years and years of futility and incompetence do not exist. Thank you so much for your empathy towards us bed wetters that wore a helmet playing football! Had we known what you and Michel knew we would have ditched our helmets also so we couldn't remember Klowe et al these past many years.

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#162 VK63
November 03 2013, 10:55AM
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Out with the trash wrote:

I have been trying to figure out how to best convey how I feel about the current Oilers situation. As a second generation ticket holder I have been attending games since the age of 5. In that time I have seen some highs and lows, but last night I witnessed something else. The passion for this team has turned into apathy. I thought it was bad in the mid 90's when I'd be in the stands with 6000 other fans watching abysmal hockey played by a sub par team. Last night almost 17,000 fans showed up to watch the Oil. Except the Oil didn't show up. I have been as loyal a fan as I could possibly be. But now is the time to cut my losses. It has become painfully obvious that the only thing the Oilers want from me is my money. Well, no more money for you. I am cutting you off. No more driving thru blizzards for games, no more jerseys, hats, nothing. I am washing my hands of this team. I have paid over $300,000 in tickets since the Oilers last playoff game. I bought into the rebuild but this is not a rebuild it is a fleecing. My seats will remain vacant for the remainder of the season and the ticket renewal notice and calls will be left unanswered at years end. The Oilers will undoubtedly fill my seats next year but for the first time in almost 36 years. I don't care. I sincerely hope for the best for the Oilers but I am no longer willing waste my time or throw away money on the garbage product that has been on display since 2007. Ah... Now to get rid of this CoolAide taste left in my mouth.

300K!! nicely done!! I feel your pain on the value analytics of said "investment".

In the words of homer Simpson.. they really are the suckiest bunch of sucks that have ever sucked.

I am shocked that Wanye dry cleaning his jersey didn't turn this thing around.... simply shocked.

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#163 FIREEAKINS
November 02 2013, 08:33PM
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WE NEED TO BOYCOTT THIS TEAM! WE NEED REXALL PLACE TO BE EMPTY, 0 fans, 0 DOLLARS TO KATZ. THEY NEED A SLAP IN THE FACE!

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#164 **
November 02 2013, 08:48PM
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this isn't funny anymore. THe Oilers should really consider bringing in a priest to spread some holy water in the dressing room and on the rink

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#165 Fred
November 02 2013, 10:06PM
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How much do they pay Kevin Lowe?

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#166 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 10:22PM
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This actually could be it for Eakins.

What else are they going to do?

In fact, while I don't think it's fair - they probably should fire him, but the ONLY coach under consideration should be Mactavish.

He and "Six Cups" built this mess, make HIM deal with it.

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#167 FireKLowe
November 02 2013, 10:34PM
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Old Retired Guy (A.K.A. Die-Nasty) wrote:

The culture of losing persists......no hits, no fights, no crashing the net, no emotion, no nothing......nothing from the coach....nobody on the bench even seems bothered ...should be interesting to what MacT has to say post game.

Fire Eakins and the entire coaching staff after the game. How can these guys stand behind the bench completely emotionless? Unfkucin believable!!!

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#168 oilredemption
November 02 2013, 10:51PM
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MacT right now should be going all Jackie moon on this team, laying in a dumpster eating the remains of what seems to be a pancake and trading away the coffee blacks before he screws up these young men's career. I want BOLD!

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#169 Headberg
November 03 2013, 01:01AM
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First time posting, follower of many years. Just felt like I finally needed to throw my 2 cents into the ring. Didn't follow the game tonight, intentionally, and by the look of things, boy am I glad. It feels great. Growing up on the Oilers religiously since the days of the Cape Breton Oilers, yes I am from Cape Breton, despite their deplorable performance in recent years, I have never felt as compelled to give them the middle finger as I currently do. I am proud that I was able to resist the urge of watching yet another gong show this evening, and nor do I intend on watching another game this season. Some might argue that I am misguided, but I feel as though I am a leading example, illustrating that the BS during the past 20 years, minus '06, is not acceptable, and I will not stand for it any longer. I've suffered long enough as a passionate loyal fan, receiving the brunt of jokes for many years, and I am done with this joke of a franchise until they become relevant again. Katz will receive no revenue from me any more, until this team demonstrates that they actually care about winning. I am done, and I leave with a big middle finger stuck strait up, pointing at the Oilers for all the lies and the complete indifference towards respectability. They do not deserve me as a fan, screw them.

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#170 hemi
November 03 2013, 08:19AM
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@pelhem grenville

For the love of all things essential to being a well balance person, do not become a leaf fan!

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#171 Out with the trash
November 03 2013, 10:10AM
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I have been trying to figure out how to best convey how I feel about the current Oilers situation. As a second generation ticket holder I have been attending games since the age of 5. In that time I have seen some highs and lows, but last night I witnessed something else. The passion for this team has turned into apathy. I thought it was bad in the mid 90's when I'd be in the stands with 6000 other fans watching abysmal hockey played by a sub par team. Last night almost 17,000 fans showed up to watch the Oil. Except the Oil didn't show up. I have been as loyal a fan as I could possibly be. But now is the time to cut my losses. It has become painfully obvious that the only thing the Oilers want from me is my money. Well, no more money for you. I am cutting you off. No more driving thru blizzards for games, no more jerseys, hats, nothing. I am washing my hands of this team. I have paid over $300,000 in tickets since the Oilers last playoff game. I bought into the rebuild but this is not a rebuild it is a fleecing. My seats will remain vacant for the remainder of the season and the ticket renewal notice and calls will be left unanswered at years end. The Oilers will undoubtedly fill my seats next year but for the first time in almost 36 years. I don't care. I sincerely hope for the best for the Oilers but I am no longer willing waste my time or throw away money on the garbage product that has been on display since 2007. Ah... Now to get rid of this CoolAide taste left in my mouth.

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#172 Dave
November 03 2013, 10:57AM
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Have you noticed that the coaches, managers and players who do a lot of talking seldom deliver where it counts .

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#173 Time Travelling Sean
November 02 2013, 10:10PM
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Loser team.

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#174 Cubsfan
November 02 2013, 10:10PM
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Thank god....SNL is on.....i'll laugh myself to sleep, instead of crying,,,.... OUT!

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#175 FireKLowe
November 02 2013, 10:19PM
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Can everyone please stop going to the games and Rexall pharmacies!!! That is the only way Katz is going to get the message.

Thank you!

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#176 Oilers=bottom3rdofLeague
November 02 2013, 10:21PM
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The arrogance of the management in this organization will make every excuse in the book for their slow start. HEY IDIOTS, YOU GOT RID OF MAC T, A LINK FROM THE PAST AND WHAT YOU FOOLS DO, YOU BROUGHT HIM BACK!! This team can't get away from the old boys club if they tried. KEVIN LOWE IS A DISEASE TO THIS TEAM, AND SO IS BUCKY, SMITH AND OF COURSE MAC T!!

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#177 Rod from Viking
November 02 2013, 10:27PM
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5-0, Smid doing another inverted snow angel on the last goal, I've been watching this team for over 30 years and this is the worst effort ever, this team doesn't give a shi#, Gallager is small and has 7 goals, big heart and scrotum, something no Oiler has except Hall and Jones.

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#178 Gordie Wayne
November 02 2013, 10:43PM
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@Zamboni Driver

ummm...never mentioned Debrusk but now that you have, he is actually at the top of my list for people that should be fired. That guy is just BRUTAL! I usually have to watch the game with the TV muted.

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#179 Alsker
November 02 2013, 10:53PM
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Fresh Mess wrote:

If Eakins gets sacked, Lowe should be demoted to head coach. Let him deal with the mess he created.

And give him an excuse to fire MacT for assembling a team without veteran leadership. No, Kblowe deserves another press conference to explain why the Oil have become epic failures under his watchful eye. That or he turns in his parking pass and cleans out his office.

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#180 God
November 02 2013, 10:54PM
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Rod from Viking wrote:

Thank God game is over, HNIC switched to Colorado-Montreal and it looks like another win for Avalanche, didn't they finish below the Oilers last year and brought in a new coach and doesn't Joe Sakic only have 2 rings? How are they ahead of Edmonton?

Exactly!!!!!! That's what I've been saying!

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#181 peppran
November 03 2013, 01:05AM
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Oldboys club wont trade "the future"...the future looks bright..i wont even play nhl14 with this team:-)

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#182 bazmagoo
November 03 2013, 01:41AM
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The players are rebelling against Eakins, another Kevin Lowe decision that has ruined another season.

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#183 GK1980
November 03 2013, 07:47AM
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The Oilers have become the nerd of the NHL. It's the kid on the playground nobody hangs out with and if a fist a cuffs occurs you want to make sure you DON'T lose to the nerd because 28 of your other buddies are standing around watching you. The Florida / Edmonton game should be fun, watching these two teams slap each other around and pull each others hair. Two of the NHL's nerds going at it while the 28 other teams stand around and laugh. Jebus!

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#185 reaperfunkss (2nd tier fan)
November 02 2013, 02:36PM
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Kill me please...Stop me from watching tonight. I am weak and kinda dumb apparently cause I am drawn to the games. I almost get a giddy high when the opponents score now cause maybe that next goal against will cause significant change for the better.

Help me please...

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#186 Hemmercules
November 02 2013, 08:27PM
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Petry. Not an nhl defenseman. Foolish me looking forward to another game. Got me again oilers you sneaky basterds.

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#187 Reg Dunlop
November 02 2013, 08:29PM
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2-zip Wings. Looks like the oil have given up already. Hope the wings don't ease up, they can send a loud message to Katz about the abortion that is the oil; if he is tuned in from his palatial Vancouver home.

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#188 Dave "Killer" Carlson
November 02 2013, 08:36PM
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CBC has the Colorado/Montreal game on HNIC in Winnipeg tonight. I could stream the Oilers game on my computer but it's not worth the effort (sending this from my phone). Tonight, I'm choosing to be an NHL fan, not an Oilers fan.

Something has to give with this team. When it does, I'll watch again. Till then, I'm not going out of my way to watch.

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#189 Reg Dunlop
November 02 2013, 09:27PM
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God wrote:

This team is a joke.

The Wings are playing like garbage. Babcock will be furious with his team.

Still we're getting destroyed.

**puts on paper bag at home**

I just put on two paper bags in case one rips.

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#190 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 10:11PM
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Oh hey cute.

Hemsky is playing.

I had no idea.

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#191 FIRE ALL BOYS ON THE BUS
November 02 2013, 11:42PM
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Todd wrote:

@WANYE - For the next photoshop contest.

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

What a joke.... No words. I did see this link before the game and it made me laugh. Maybe we all need a laugh (at Kevin Lowe's expense)

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

good work by whoever made this...

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#192 Buzz
November 03 2013, 01:22AM
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FireKLowe wrote:

I'm sure JW and the rest of the homies from EJ will find positives ...

Just got up to change my ATTENDS(plum full they were too). I read David Staples article in the EJ.

'FireKLowe' blogged above that the writers at EJ and the ESun imo would put a positive spin on the situation. Well, props to Staples. He, like Brownlee called it as they saw it. They both put the blame directly on the Katz/Lowe brainfart school of business.

A short read but Staples hit the proverbial nail on the head.

Katz and the 'Boys on the bus' need to go away.

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#193 Rod from Viking
November 03 2013, 08:47AM
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This whole mess is on upper management, remember after the 06 run, Pronger traded for peanuts, overpaying Horcoff, Pisani etc, trading the young core that actually had some size and grit (Stoll,Green and Torres), offer sheets to Penner and Vanek, this not only was the beginning of the end it enabled the Ducks and Kings to win a cup. Stauffer was so adamant that EIG sell to Katz and what a difference it would make and a lot of us bought in because we had loved Bob's candidacy at another time and place radio show. Well it has made a huge difference, Katz got a new toy, Stauffer got his dream job, and Kevin Lowe got an apparent live time contract. It would not have been to difficult to have drafted smarter on the 2012 FOA and bridge contracts for the fab 3 would have been more logical. I am a tier 1 season ticket holder and leaving the seats empty not giving them away and no renewals is the only way anything is going to change and that is tough at the price we paid for them but an empty building will produce changes.

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#194 SRELIOFAN
November 03 2013, 10:36AM
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Before the season started, I moved to Vancouver and got a new job working evenings and I was sad that I wouldn't be able to watch all of my beloved Oilers games. I wanted so badly for us to start being competitive and winning against teams like the goddamn canucks so I could rub it into their fan's faces for once. Instead, I had to delete my Oilers background from my phone so I would stop getting the sarcastic comments and harassment from my coworkers. I wanted to wear my oilers jersey with pride in another city. I'm pretty sure the copper on my jersey has faded to a poop colored brown from being unused. Needless to say, I can't watch the games and I'm not even mad. Just sad. Maybe not even sad. Numb is more like it.

On a lighter note, on Tuesday, I'm going to put on my Oil Kings jersey with pride and go watch the only team that Edmonton can be proud and unashamed of.

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#195 Mikey
November 02 2013, 01:38PM
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Wanye wrote:

Just got a text from my main man Rick at the Pint "Just found my '06 Western Conference Champions hat in the back of my closet. We have had bad luck since I bought it the day after we beat Anaheim. I just threw it out."

THATS THE STUFF RICK!

Not good enough, Burn it!!

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#196 DoubleA 34
November 02 2013, 02:31PM
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GDP a little boy sitting behind Dallas tells him that he sucks.

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#197 RexHolez
November 02 2013, 08:08PM
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Just quickly logged on to note that I'm not watching tonight's game. Even though I have no prior commitments, for the first time in years, perhaps for the first time since childhood... doing some laundry, perhaps scrubbing the toilet sounds like a more appealing option to me than the agony of watching my team struggle to play a complete NHL calibre game yet again... 8 years later. Hey Wayne, how long did it take Europe to rebuild after wwII

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#198 Reg Dunlop
November 02 2013, 08:39PM
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Oiler's token forecheck pressure reminds me of a beer league team. 2nd division beer league.

Coach should call time out and the players should all get dressed and head home. Or to The Rack, before the kitties are all picked up.

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#199 Loweblows
November 02 2013, 08:39PM
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Looks like the detroit goalie is going to get a shutout in his first nhl game- a effin peewee goalie would get a shutout vs these pathetic losers- 5 effin minutes in and this game is over- this whole organization blows

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#200 God
November 02 2013, 08:42PM
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I'm watching, hoping, waiting for the fans to begin to boo and pull out the paper bags.

This is the sole reason why I'm currently watching.

An Oiler goal wouldn't even please me anymore.

I'm sick of the excuses. I just want them to lose brutally so there are no more 'we were out-finished' garbage. The Oil have been lucky to have been a part of the games they've played.

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