GDB 15.0: RED WINGS

Wanye
November 02 2013 01:09PM

 

Jason Gregor texted me to say "I have baby business to attend to on Saturday. Gregor 2,0 is only weeks away. I will need you to write the GDB for the Red Wings game." "Me?" we replied "last time I wrote a GDB people said it was silly and cried for you to write every one until 2099."

Well one doesn't argue with Jason Gregor if one hopes to be alive for the next Oilers win. So here goes nothing.

AND SO IT CONTINUES

How many ways are there to say that the Oilers rebuild is taking longer than it took to rebuild Europe after WWII?  At some point we start to scramble for new acronyms making a chase for last place an exciting proposition.

After the pantsing the Leafs gave the Oil on Tuesday - in front of LeafsNation Steve Dangle who had flown in for the match no less - it is hard to make bold predictions of Oilers wins. We sat there at Rexall Place, next to the King of all Maple Leafs fans watching them cheer and smile and raise their fists in triumph. We want that so badly for all our fellow Oilers fans it hurts.

Yes, if you told us "Wanye, all you have to do is get hit by a car and the Oil will turn around quick as a flash" we would run screaming from Wanye Manor and get hit square by the first motorcar we happened to see. Sadly it ain't that easy. But there are still things we can do as Oilers fans to try and turn the ship around.

In fact we have an idea.

AN IDEA

We hockey fans are a superstitious lot. Lucky underwear, lucky beer brand, lucky type of fur coat deodorizer. Cheering from the same seat on the couch. We all have some little foible we cling to in the hopes it makes our beloved Oilers win. Well Nation whatever we are doing is wrong.

We need to collectively reboot our lucky charms and send a wave of new karma out into the universe. Rather than focusing on what we don't want - more losses, more injuries, more Grebeshkovs in the lineup - we need to take new actions focused on what we want.

Wins.

Pictured at the top of the article is our most prized possession - our Eberle jersey purchased minutes after 14 scored his mind shattering first goal in the NHL. Thinking it was lucky we haven't so much as cleaned it once in the 4 years since. At the quarter pole of his 5th season it is clear the luck ain't working.

So we took the jersey to the cleaners on Thursday and got it back clean as clean can be. This was our major good luck charm these past 4 years and we wouldn't dream of doing this normally. But drastic times call for drastic measures. We invite you to reconsider whatever lucky charms you have and bring new ones out. The team needs it Nation. It's the only thing left we can think of doing.

Let us know if you think of anything you can do to reboot the franchise's luck. Burn your lucky drawers. Switch brands of game day beer. Remarry a new luckier wife if you think it will help. Just do something positive that is a break with the past.

We beg you.

LINEUP - GOOD

 

According to DailyFaceOff.com the Oilers are icing the forward corps above and the defensive pairings below. And according to the very same site Bachman will get the start in between the pipes tonight.

LINEUP - BAD

 

Forwards up, defense below and something called a Petr Mrazek will be tending for the Wings tonight. Poor bugger won't even have a chance. 

 

PREDICTIONS R US

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Oilers win 4-2 shocking many including the Oilers themselves.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: During the second intermission Coack Babcock screams at Mrazek to step his game up to which the goalie tearfully replies "I don't even know who I am. WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DID YOU START ME IN AN NHL GAME?"

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Hearing about the jersey cleaning Jordan Eberle pots a pair of goals. In the post game scrum he comments "I knew something was holding me back this year. Here all this time it was a ratty jersey covered in shots of Jack Daniels from the Pint. I wish Wanye had gotten his hygenic act together years ago."

Hearing my name mentioned by King Jordan I immediately transcend into a beam of pure joy and shoot into space.

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#151 Jordan1126
November 03 2013, 07:28AM
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geez, this was horrible...at least it wasn't on national tv or anything :P .... honestly though can someone please tell me what kind of system the oilers are playing??? I brought my wife to this game..the first game she has been to in 5 years...Not being much of a hockey fan her only words were "they play like they dont care".....I thought we were promised fitness and compete this year by eakins...so far all I have seen are injuries and excuses....

I wish the Oilers would put in half the effort on the ice as I see them do on the oilers facebook page regarding their effort to dress up for halloween and party...

If I was on this team right now the only thing that would be on my mind is how to win, and how to get the team to win....not how good i would look as a hot dog for halloween (j schultz)....perhaps the team can wear the hot dogs on the ice next game, it would at least match their play as it looks like a bunch of weiners running around with no clue of what to do.

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#152 Cameron
November 03 2013, 07:31AM
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"Lucy, you got some splainin to do"

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#153 Tier2
November 03 2013, 07:44AM
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Thank God I'm a second tier fan (I.e. Not good enough for KLowe to waste time with ). This rebuild had been botched from day one.

1. Get a goalie...draft , trade , free agent; whatever if takes . 2. Get DMen ... Ryan Murray? Develop Schultz in thd minors until he can play NHL minutes. Take notes from Detroit . We have a slew of DMen who can't play. 3. Centers.... Can't have enough . RNH will be ok. Should have taken galchenyuk, not another winger.

Turning over coaches has told the players that there crap don't stink . They are now totally unaccountable and that can't be fixed until they are broken up . Pick one or two and make a bold move. Might get less skill back but more compete to offset the skill.

It ain't Eakins. He had a stellar rep throughout the league prior to being hired here. He needs time to implement his direction but needs two thing : 1. Players who want and can learn and listen. Find out who the main culprits are and get their asses out of here. 2. Competent assistants who can help teach and coach. I'm betting Eakins ' ambition to be a head coach overrode his better judgement about hiring his own assistants; guys he knows can coach and guys he trusts. Nobody tell me he had a choice about KB and SS. That directive cams from Lowe and MacT.

And if Messier is in fact brought in in some capacity, then it will definitely prove that Katz is just a jock sniffer with no real interest in winning. And why would he ? Building is full of first tier fans buying stuff.

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#154 15w40
November 03 2013, 07:48AM
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CBC is going to start playing re-runs of the Road to Avonlea instead of broadcasting the late game if the Oilers are the only Canadian team in the match.

Not that I watched a whole bunch of it but the 10 minutes of the game that I did see in passing were pretty representative of the other 50 minutes.

It's not longer even maddening anymore. Its like watching a huge wreck unfold in slow motion with some commercials mixed in - like in Talladega Nights.

It goes from being comical to just flat out - meh........

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#155 Rod from Viking
November 03 2013, 08:47AM
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This whole mess is on upper management, remember after the 06 run, Pronger traded for peanuts, overpaying Horcoff, Pisani etc, trading the young core that actually had some size and grit (Stoll,Green and Torres), offer sheets to Penner and Vanek, this not only was the beginning of the end it enabled the Ducks and Kings to win a cup. Stauffer was so adamant that EIG sell to Katz and what a difference it would make and a lot of us bought in because we had loved Bob's candidacy at another time and place radio show. Well it has made a huge difference, Katz got a new toy, Stauffer got his dream job, and Kevin Lowe got an apparent live time contract. It would not have been to difficult to have drafted smarter on the 2012 FOA and bridge contracts for the fab 3 would have been more logical. I am a tier 1 season ticket holder and leaving the seats empty not giving them away and no renewals is the only way anything is going to change and that is tough at the price we paid for them but an empty building will produce changes.

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#156 Zamboni Driver
November 03 2013, 10:20AM
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@michael

WOW!

You picked the number of points EXACTLY?

What are the chances?

You're a genius!

And in your professional, way smarter and more level-headed than everyone else, opinion...the Oilers will "not make the playoffs". I'm glad you clarified. I will cancel the appointment with my bookie in Vegas.

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#157 boxman
November 03 2013, 10:27AM
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michael wrote:

Suck it up you bunch of fair weather pansies. What did you expect coming out of the gate this season? 10-0 ,20-0.

I expected just what I am seeing. I thought we would get 8 points in October. We got 8 points.

There was o way in my mind that we were going to any better. No RNH.NO Gagner.New systems. New coaches. New coaches. The chemistry for this team was and is so messed up its not even funny.

Who expected to win last night give your head a shake.

A veteran team that plays a system that they have had for years under a coach they have had for years with a group of players that have played together for years. Yup we should have beaten that team.

Reality check over. Now that you've all been put in your right frame of mind I'll tell you what else I believe.

I believe that this team will not make the playoffs. Given what we know about the analytics that was easy to say. The harder thing to say is that I believe that Dallas Eakins will turn this team around by the Olympic break. Till then it will not be pretty. At all. Put your fire Klowes,trade Yakupov, and all your other fear driven ideas to rest and for the next little while watch this team learn and grow. It'll like watching a two year old toddler. It won't be pretty but eventually the toddler learns.

Fair weather pansies you say......I say lose your holier than thou attitude and give your own head a shake. The seats I was " lucky " enough to be gifted last night are $280 each. For that princely sum I didn't see one Oiler player that gave his best. You in all your self anointed glory prattle on how you predicted this calamity. Who the hell cares what you predict! People paying $280 a night for tickets damn well don't. If people want to watch a toddler grow they will check out the tom thumbs at the local rink. There were 17,000 at Rexall last night that hoped for the Oilers to put forth a professional effort. It didn't happen and hasn't happened far too often. If you want to talk reality checks try watching the effort the Flames put out compared to the Oilers. I guess what I'm trying to say if you are all for patience and watching the Oiler toddlers grow there is a long line up of season ticket holders willing to sell you their tickets while this is happening! Child....please.

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#158 Zamboni Driver
November 03 2013, 10:32AM
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@Zarny

Oh another person smarter than all the rest of us.

Good.

you let us know when it's okay to be concerned.

3 wins in 15 games is not a problem then. Second last in the NHL is a-okay. WHEW. Here I thought the point was to, you know, WIN a few more.

In fact the point is.........well actually I don't know.

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#159 Jason Gregor
November 03 2013, 01:39PM
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Sean17 wrote:

Is this a record for most posted comments on Oilersnation???

Not even close actually...we've had 1000 comments in an article before.

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#160 Zarny
November 03 2013, 02:25PM
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Zamboni Driver wrote:

Oh another person smarter than all the rest of us.

Good.

you let us know when it's okay to be concerned.

3 wins in 15 games is not a problem then. Second last in the NHL is a-okay. WHEW. Here I thought the point was to, you know, WIN a few more.

In fact the point is.........well actually I don't know.

Nope, not smarter than the rest. But smart enough to know you don't panic in a crisis. No matter how big your problem is, you can always make it worse.

3 wins in 15 games is certainly a problem. It's just not that surprising. The Oilers were destined for a slow start. 7 wins by now was probably best case scenario.

So this season isn't best case. You don't wet your pants.

The criticism of the team's play is accurate; but what did you expect from a group of 19-21 y/o supported by the deepest 5-7 D in the league and a G who might be good enough to make the playoffs?

That's where this team is at. 1st overall picks don't come with magical pixie dust from a land of unicorns and rainbows. They still take years to fully develop. And you need depth to win.

Eakins isn't the problem anymore than Oates was last year in Wsh. Ovechkin sh*t the bed the first 20 games of last year too. His approach is the right one.

Let me grab my shocked face 19-21 y/o kids who average 122 NHL games make mistakes learning a new system against the best players in the game.

Bold Moves™ are required. Knew that before the season started. Nothing has changed. Those moves aren't usually available 15 games into a season. And you don't pull a Mike Milbury to salvage 10th place.

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#161 Lowetide
November 02 2013, 01:14PM
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I've changed from drining Crown Royal with Coke to trying coke with Crown Royal. Here's hoping!

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#162 dougtheslug
November 02 2013, 01:25PM
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Justin Schulz being replaced by Phil Larsen. Pitlick and Perron still out.Ryan Hamilton in. After 6 years in the toilet Oilers are still icing an AHL lineup, only now it is only 15 games into the season. I do not know what else to say.

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#164 konst16
November 02 2013, 01:49PM
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No Gags ? Line up looks like the one from a week or so back.

I've been with my girlfriend since the last game of the SJ series in '06....

Oh dear.

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#166 Slats
November 02 2013, 03:21PM
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Gordie Wayne wrote:

Wanye: I was filling with gas when the nozzle clicked off and I thought of you when I saw the resulting numbers. Maybe this is a sign??? Eberle and Yakupov to light it up tonight??? See the picture at the link below:


Eberle-Yakupov-Perfect-Fill

That's funny

Actually my credit card got stolen one time and the cops said gas attendants were likely the source. So I took to always filling up my car myself and always ended the #s with 94, 14, 4, 93 etc my wife has been filling the cars since the start of the season!!!

I apologize to Oilernation .. ..

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#167 Todd
November 02 2013, 03:48PM
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@Wanye

@WANYE - For the next photoshop contest.

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

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#168 Harlie
November 02 2013, 03:49PM
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Even the Red Wings jersey's look bigger and more dominating than ours.

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#169 Harlie
November 02 2013, 03:51PM
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Todd wrote:

@WANYE - For the next photoshop contest.

http://i.imgur.com/1XIyPjN.jpg

Gold!

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#170 Brad
November 02 2013, 03:54PM
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@Lowetide

Does anyone know what the actual lines look like tonight? This game could get pretty lopsided!

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#171 R-Dawg
November 02 2013, 04:11PM
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In keeping with the theme, my wife bought me some Oilers p.j sweats in 06 during the run. I have just torn them up and will be using them as shop rags. Here's to the Oil! 3-1 win!!

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#172 6Rings
November 02 2013, 04:12PM
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I think it will be very ugly tonight and the booing will start early and be relentless.

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#173 Johe
November 02 2013, 04:15PM
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Brad wrote:

Does anyone know what the actual lines look like tonight? This game could get pretty lopsided!

Jones RNH Ebs

Yak Gags Hemmer

Hamilton Gordon Arco

Eager Acton Gazdic

Smid Petry

Ference Elder Schultz

Belov Larsen

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#174 rob
November 02 2013, 04:22PM
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after a 6 pack and dusting off of my smyth jersey i am feeling really good,so game day prediction is oilers 7 wings 2.if that doesent work time to roll up a a a a cigarette!

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#175 Poolanov
November 02 2013, 04:28PM
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RR and pepsi it is yum yum!!!!

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So, do I leave the Gags jersey in the closet and wear the Gilbert instead?

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#177 K_Mart
November 02 2013, 04:34PM
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*removes '06 M-A Bergeron jersey.... throws it in the trash. Held on too long.

Yes, you read that right. I owned the jersey of the player that ran into roloson, indirectly costing us our beloved stanley cup.

I apologize.

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#178 **
November 02 2013, 07:02PM
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this game is going to be an Oil massacre.

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#179 FIREEAKINS
November 02 2013, 08:28PM
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FIRE COACH EAKINS! LOOK AT THAT 2~0 with 50 minutes to go ! Oilers suck ass

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#180 FIREEAKINS
November 02 2013, 08:33PM
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WE NEED TO BOYCOTT THIS TEAM! WE NEED REXALL PLACE TO BE EMPTY, 0 fans, 0 DOLLARS TO KATZ. THEY NEED A SLAP IN THE FACE!

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#181 OilersSuck
November 02 2013, 08:39PM
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OILERS SUCK ASS! THEY ARE SO DAMN BAD! I AM STARTING TO HATE THE OILERS!

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#182 Loweblows
November 02 2013, 08:48PM
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Note to oilers: the blades on your feet do not move themselves, the black thing sliding around is called the "puck"', the other team is red, skate towards the goalie wearing red and the black thing you try and put behind him, try and keep the black slidy thing out of your net.

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#183 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 08:53PM
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By the way #43 on the Wings is frickin' fast.

THEY'RE STEALING OUR THING

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#184 Outdoors guy
November 02 2013, 08:57PM
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The Oiler organization started to suck many years ago. When the Laforge group with Lowe took over, they became an orginazition that disenfranchised the people. Despite what they say, they don't care about the game. It's dollars. Plain and simple. As long as money flows into the coffer of the team, they don't care. STOP SPENDING $$$$$$$$ on this team. It's the only message they wiifm understand. There is nobody to blame but the Oiler fan for the state of today's team. If you keep going to the game and buying the jerseys, they don't care. That's money in Katz's pocket. Stop going to the games and supporting this organization that has been terrible for the last 15 years and maybe they will get the message. But somehow I don't think they're that smart.

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#185 oilredemption
November 02 2013, 09:07PM
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REINHART!REINHART!REINHART!

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#186 Gerry
November 02 2013, 09:07PM
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Kassian takes out Bolland. Hmmm 40 + games

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#187 Reggi
November 02 2013, 09:35PM
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Reggi wrote:

Fire Lowe , Bucky and Smith .

Now that is a good start for turning this team around.

Good try Kevin L giving me a trash.

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#188 Outdoors guy
November 02 2013, 09:35PM
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THE OILER ORGANIZATION IS A JOKE. WHY CAN' T Katz see that? Oh wait , he he wants to collect life size hockey cards. Kevin Lowe is #1. He' s got it, No point in worrying now?

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#189 Seriously
November 02 2013, 10:08PM
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FireKLowe wrote:

Fire Kevin Lowe immediately! He is the only common denominator in this "failed" rebuild. This is plain and simply embarrassing.

Well Kevin did say "he knows something about WINNING!" yeah it sure "F"'n looks like it tonight!! Here is a news flash Kevin Lowe... Your glory days are over!!!!!!! If you had any balls, you should man up, do all the fans of Edmonton a favor, and leave the organization!!!!!

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#190 Sammy
November 02 2013, 10:09PM
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Fred wrote:

How much do they pay Kevin Lowe?

TO MUCH!!!!!!

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#191 Cubsfan
November 02 2013, 10:10PM
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Thank god....SNL is on.....i'll laugh myself to sleep, instead of crying,,,.... OUT!

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#192 Dave
November 02 2013, 10:16PM
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Any fans still watching the game at Rexall ?

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#193 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 10:19PM
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Uhhhh....you know, well obviously it's disappointing. You know, uhhhh...it's unacceptable and obviously we have to obviously be more obviously....uhhhh..... - every single Oiler 'hockey player' being interviewed after the game.

Except Hemsky.

Who has a thing has to rush away to.

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#194 Rob Gilgan
November 02 2013, 10:21PM
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Dave wrote:

Any fans still watching the game at Rexall ?

The Oilers are watching the game. They just watched Bertuzzi and Andersson score.

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#195 Toro
November 02 2013, 10:23PM
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So has management just accepted another year of failure or are they gonna do something .... Anything to try and make this team into and NHL squad.... What a joke , never been ashamed to be an Oiler fan but it's really getting hard to stick behind this team

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#196 Sammy
November 02 2013, 10:26PM
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My only reason for watching the end of this game is the hope that it will turn into a sh!t show similar to the Philly game last night. Show some f#@kin heart oilers!!!!

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#197 BrutalOilers
November 02 2013, 10:29PM
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So....... I am so confused....... This team and the local media have lead us to believe this team was in a great position for rebuilding and yet teams like Colorado and Toronto are WAY, WAY ahead of us and I am certain most people thought we had the rebuild right. That Edmonton was doing the rebuild the PROPER way!! What a load of crap. This is embarrassing!!

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#198 Randy
November 02 2013, 10:32PM
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This is bovine manure.

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#199 Fresh Mess
November 02 2013, 10:33PM
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Now Belov taken out by his own team mate. There goes their best D man. Keystone cops. Pure comedy.

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#200 Zamboni Driver
November 02 2013, 10:36PM
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@Gordie Wayne

TOTALLY disagree.

This is WAY better than Debrusk telling us how nice Eberle's hair looked earlier. And how Gordon won two consecutive faceoffs, so that's a GREAT sign.

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