GDB 31.0: THE BOA

Wanye
December 07 2013 01:11PM

 

Proud new parents Traci and Jason welcomed their son Beckett William Douglas Gregor into the world on December 4th, 2013. This Battle of Alberta article is dedicated to him.

We met a nice little fellow at an Oilers game a few weeks back. Standing in line for pizza we saw that we were both sporting the Eberle 14 and got to talking business. "I am 8 years old and I haven't seen the Oilers in the playoffs once" we were informed in no uncertain terms by our fellow Oilers fan.

Doing some quick mental math we calculated he was indeed alive for the glorious run of '06. "What about the Cup run? You were alive for that" we replied. The kid rolled his eyes as only kids can towards moron adults and said matter of factly "yeah but I was just a baby so that doesn't count."

"Well what is your best Oilers memory then" we asked. "I dunno," came the reply after some time. "Maybe Yak sliding across the ice after that goal?"

Yikes. By the time we were 8 years old the Oilers had already won the Stanley Cup 4 times. 

Your average 8 year old Oilers fan been alive for the playoffs exactly once and we have it on good authority that the one year apparently doesn't count. And before you start laughing Flames fans things aren't much better down there having missed the playoffs four years in a row.

Look at little Cameron here, taken to his first Oilers game by my main man @clayballs22 the other night.  See the intent gaze in Cameron's eyes? There is no mistaking that look. He is there to see Oilers wins. Fellas like Cameron deserve great memories of their team as a tyke which will cement his status as a superfan later on in life.

We pity these kids of today. No wins, no playoffs, nothing to get excited about re-enacting whilst playing mini stick hockey at recess until you break your little wooden stick on another kid in overtime and get a half day suspension in the library and a lifetime ban from recess hockey.*

That's what being a lil fan of the Oilers or Flames is all about. Not rebuilds, labour disruptions and cheering for Entry Draft lottery wins.

We want better hockey in the next 8 years than we have seen in the past 8. If not for the sake of our shattered heart and expectations but for kids like Paul, dressed in his Oilers finery by proud dad @dahoosman in the expectation he too will become a big fan if he isn't already. 

Heck we even want better hockey for you Calgary, for all the poor misguided kids wearing Flames jerseys for whom the Igninla years will only be a story from before their time. Here's hoping to the emergence of the next generation of Iginlas in the North and South of Alberta that the Becketts, Camerons and Pauls will tell teach their kids about one day.

And here's to the Battle of Albertas of tomorrow. Games where there are playoff implications, with both sides dreading having to face each other down the stretch. Epic pitched battles on minus 30 nights that will cause kids like Beckett William Douglas Gregor to replay the game over and over again in his mind as he tries in vain to sleep after the final whistle.

Magic games that will ignite a whole new generation of fans of our respective teams.

*The Life of Wanye Gretz circa 1987

LINES - EDM - 14th place (10-18-2)

Hall - Gagner - Yakupov

Perron - The Nuge - Eberle

Smyth - Arcobello - Hemsky

Gazdic - Lander - Jones

Ference - Larsen

N. Schultz - J. Schultz

Marincin - Petry 

Dubnyk

LINES - CGY - 13th place - (10-14-2)

The Flames hadn't tweeted their lines as of press time here so this lineup is the latest from our friends over at DailyFaceOff.com: 

Cammalleri - Stajan - Stempniak 

Hudler - Backlund - D. Jones 

Baertschi - Byron - B. Jones 

MacDermid - Bouma - Smith

Butler - Giordano

Russell- Brodie

Smid - O'Brien

Berra

Expect last minute changes to both lineups as game time nears.

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Since I'm going to the game, the Oilers will win. Sir Eberle pots a pair as the Oilers win 5-1.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Considering I forgot to include this with the original article, the Oilers will get off to a slow start, but like just my beer consumption at the game, they will pick up speed in the final few periods and cruise to victory.

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: I've decided to ditch my Eberle jersey for this game and go with my new Gazdic. I don't expect Lucky Luke to score very often, but after fighting that behemoth McGratton, I felt the urge to support Gazdic. My new jersey is also popular with the ladies, and Wanye Manor will be rocking later tonight after the Gaz Man picks up unexpected second-period assist and makes me look good to some unlucky lady who had three Rexall Beers.

UPDATE: THESE PREDICTIONS ARE COUNTERFEIT HAVING BEEN ADDED BY PAPA GREGOR IN MY NAME - WG

09049f03ecb006ab29372206f2a88f75
Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#151 Jeff
December 07 2013, 09:57PM
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Imagine if you had a job and you had the results Kevin Lowe has had in the last 8 years.

They still pay him, so I guess they pay for failure. He knows losing.

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#152 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 09:58PM
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Arius Mumin wrote:

All the Gagner funboys blame everything on Lowe.

From what I have noticed in the comments section most posters, that for whatever reason defend Gagner, will use Lowe as their scapegoat.

They can't bring themselves to blame what they see, so they lay blame on something they don't have a clue about.

I'm usually the one defending Gags. Whatever he lacked on the draw and playing away from the puck he made up for with stellar offensive plays. But he hasn't made it very easy this year and the injury really shouldn't be an excuse at this point. That pass was boneheaded and he does stuff like that all the time now. And his offence is a total crap shoot.

jury should be out on Arcobello by the trade deadline. If gags doesn't shape up his spot might be in serious jeopardy.

I still blame Lowe though. To many inexperienced players and personnel learning their jobs from other inexperienced players and personnel. Thats on Lowe. Just look at the way he handled Gagner, right to the wolves. Set him back IMO.

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#153 Rocket
December 07 2013, 09:59PM
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So The Oilers know that they're allowed to score before the third period right? It's not against the rules to score in the first two periods.Did they not get that memo?

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#154 Ricky
December 07 2013, 09:59PM
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Oilers are losing to the worst team on paper in the NHL and they are missing players and some are sick tonight and playing.

Ha Ha Ha

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#155 James
December 07 2013, 10:02PM
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@YFC Prez

There's something up with Gagner. His head hasn't been in the game this season. MC79 tweeted something during this morning's skate that Gagner didn't hear something Eakins said because he'd skated away to the boards. I thought that sounded weird. It made me wonder if something is up with Sam, if he's not happy or well mentally or something like that. I don't know, I just thought that was odd.

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#156 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 10:04PM
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James wrote:

There's something up with Gagner. His head hasn't been in the game this season. MC79 tweeted something during this morning's skate that Gagner didn't hear something Eakins said because he'd skated away to the boards. I thought that sounded weird. It made me wonder if something is up with Sam, if he's not happy or well mentally or something like that. I don't know, I just thought that was odd.

He's definitely taken a ridiculous step backwards this season. All we can do is speculate I guess.

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#157 Jeff In Lethbridge
December 07 2013, 10:04PM
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Rocket wrote:

So The Oilers know that they're allowed to score before the third period right? It's not against the rules to score in the first two periods.Did they not get that memo?

the Oil have had what, 8 power plays? and Flames playing one of the worst games of the year... lol

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#158 @Oilanderp
December 07 2013, 10:05PM
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Berra playing good and lucky. Lames playin good solid D in front of him. A lot of pressure by the Oil late in the second. You've GOT to think they are going to tie it up come the next period.

Still time for the 5 unanswered goals called for by Wanye!

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#159 Sam Reinhart
December 07 2013, 10:05PM
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I do feel sorry for the young players that play for the Oilers they stunt their growth. They ruin players.

Perron and Gordon come from other organizations and know how to play. Give them a couple more years Oilers will brainwash them.

Please Please don't draft me.

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#160 vetinari
December 07 2013, 10:06PM
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Ricky wrote:

Oilers are losing to the worst team on paper in the NHL and they are missing players and some are sick tonight and playing.

Ha Ha Ha

Your point??? How did you think we earned the worst record in the West? By having NHL quality goaltending? Defencemen who can play defence? A centre and maybe a couple of big wingers on the roster? Sir, we earned it by having the worst management team in professional sports. And if there is a decision to be made that could affect the outcome of a hockey game, rest assured, we will make the wrong one. Now please give us our top 5 draft pick and tell us when the 2014 training camp is here...

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#161 prendrefeu
December 07 2013, 10:06PM
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What happened to Canadian commercials? They used to be funny. Now they're just wannabe American. WTF?

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#162 James
December 07 2013, 10:07PM
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@YFC Prez

True enough. He definitely hasn't been the same player this season. His smarts seem to have left him for whatever reason.

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#163 @Oilanderp
December 07 2013, 10:08PM
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Holy sh!tty PP Katzman!

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#164 Darnell Nurse
December 07 2013, 10:09PM
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Sam Reinhart wrote:

I do feel sorry for the young players that play for the Oilers they stunt their growth. They ruin players.

Perron and Gordon come from other organizations and know how to play. Give them a couple more years Oilers will brainwash them.

Please Please don't draft me.

Please trade me!

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#165 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 10:10PM
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Stempniak is playing a great game for the flames. Best player on the ice so far tonight.

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#166 MichaelD
December 07 2013, 10:11PM
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This Smid-O'brien shift is hard to watch

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#167 Darrell
December 07 2013, 10:11PM
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Ricky wrote:

Oilers are losing to the worst team on paper in the NHL and they are missing players and some are sick tonight and playing.

Ha Ha Ha

On my screen - your an idiot !

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#168 prendrefeu
December 07 2013, 10:12PM
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Darrell wrote:

On my screen - your an idiot !

It's spelled "you're" not "your."

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#169 Alsker
December 07 2013, 10:13PM
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James wrote:

There's something up with Gagner. His head hasn't been in the game this season. MC79 tweeted something during this morning's skate that Gagner didn't hear something Eakins said because he'd skated away to the boards. I thought that sounded weird. It made me wonder if something is up with Sam, if he's not happy or well mentally or something like that. I don't know, I just thought that was odd.

Think it has anything to do with his new contract, NMC and all the praise in the world from management. Like he needs to gives a flying f^ck...or maybe because he's got a girl he's serious about and hockey really isn't important anymore.

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#170 Reg Dunlop
December 07 2013, 10:14PM
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I just tuned in, did the NHL finally outlaw body checks? Oil mgmt. has been convinced they would.

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#171 Ricky
December 07 2013, 10:14PM
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prendrefeu wrote:

It's spelled "you're" not "your."

What an idiot

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#172 FlamesRule
December 07 2013, 10:15PM
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@Todd

Todd, I think Ference's new finest moment should be the -1for being on the ice when Stemp scored!

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#173 @Oilanderp
December 07 2013, 10:15PM
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Someone please tell the Oilers that the purpose of a powerplay is not to just pass it around.

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#174 vetinari
December 07 2013, 10:18PM
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I would love to play poker with Eakins... when they pan the camera over to his direction... you always know what he is thinking... it's usually along the lines of "for f#$^'s sakes"...

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#175 Darrell
December 07 2013, 10:18PM
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prendrefeu wrote:

It's spelled "you're" not "your."

Ouch - good call and that's as embarrassing as the Oiler PP ....

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#176 Terry
December 07 2013, 10:20PM
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Imagine paying money for this game , going outside in -30 C and watching this.

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#177 Darrell
December 07 2013, 10:22PM
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Ricky wrote:

What an idiot

Thanks Bubbles - go feed your cats ...

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#178 Slats
December 07 2013, 10:23PM
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ok it's the 10 minute mark of the 3rd time for Calgary to give this one away with 3 unanswered....

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#179 Alsker
December 07 2013, 10:24PM
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Just our luck Dr.Jekyll had to show up, where the he#l is Mr.Hyde!!!!!We need that giant monstrosity of luck...Oh well next game Hyde's back...hopefully

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#180 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 10:25PM
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Zzzzzzzzzzzz

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#181 Reg Dunlop
December 07 2013, 10:26PM
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Good thing the oil are playing a completely zero talent team tonight or it would be 10-zip.

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#182 Slats
December 07 2013, 10:26PM
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Nuge is so overdue man I hope he wins this tonight

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#183 MichaelD
December 07 2013, 10:27PM
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I've learnt from this game, I wanna grow my hair out and buy a lot of hair gel. So I can rock the Eakins look

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#184 Slats
December 07 2013, 10:31PM
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someone tell Larson that Paul Coffey wants his skates back . . .

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#185 Alsker
December 07 2013, 10:33PM
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Sad I've decided to watch Distict 9 instead of this crapfest, aliens seem more explainable than our beloved Oilers...I hate KBlowe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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#186 Old Time Hockey
December 07 2013, 10:36PM
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Thank you Oilers and Flames for helping all Canadians sleep on a Saturday night. Zzzzzzzzzzzz.

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#187 Slats
December 07 2013, 10:37PM
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momentum changer . . . hole in the ice . .

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#188 Rocket
December 07 2013, 10:37PM
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Kelly Hrudy: "Blah blah blah blah Giordano rulz blah blah blah."

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#189 Rod from Viking
December 07 2013, 10:37PM
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How about setting your plays away from Giordano.

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#190 @Oilanderp
December 07 2013, 10:38PM
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@Alsker

Sad I've decided to watch Distink 9 instead of this crapfest, aliens seem more explainable than our beloved Oilers...I hate KBlowe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fixed.

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#191 Slats
December 07 2013, 10:41PM
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fLames saves/blocked shots 32 Berra 16

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#192 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 10:42PM
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Rocket wrote:

Kelly Hrudy: "Blah blah blah blah Giordano rulz blah blah blah."

I must be loosing it. I heard blah blah blah blah Cassie Campbell is good looking blah blah blah

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#193 Reg Dunlop
December 07 2013, 10:42PM
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Flames deserve the win as they outworked the oil in a very close contest. What could be more depressing than 'very close contest'? The Flames are the least talented squad in the league and they are a better team than the oil after 4 rebuilding years. May as well laugh or I'll cry. Good night sports fans.

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#194 Arius Mumin
December 07 2013, 10:44PM
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YFC Prez wrote:

He's definitely taken a ridiculous step backwards this season. All we can do is speculate I guess.

hahahahahaha

we can speculate when it comes to Gagner's bullsh!t, but when it comes to Oilers bullsh!t: we can be sure it is the fault of Kevin Lowe.

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#195 Alsker
December 07 2013, 10:44PM
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@Oilanderp wrote:
Sad I've decided to watch Distink 9 instead of this crapfest, aliens seem more explainable than our beloved Oilers...I hate KBlowe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fixed.

Whooops, I meant district 9...sorry!!!!!!!!!!

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#196 MichaelD
December 07 2013, 10:44PM
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@YFC Prez

I'm 90% sure Hurdy is calling this game drunker then most of us. He has being saying odd stuff all game

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#197 @Oilanderp
December 07 2013, 10:45PM
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YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

*falls off edge of screen*

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#198 Arius Mumin
December 07 2013, 10:45PM
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WHAT!in da mutha#@$%!

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#199 YFC Prez
December 07 2013, 10:45PM
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hallsy!!!!! That 30 seconds had more action than the rest of the game.

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#200 EugeneV
December 07 2013, 10:46PM
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Thank you for taking a point from us Oilers. You learn how to work hard, we work hard but still earn high draft choice. ;-}

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