GDB 25.0: HAWKS

Wanye
March 10 2013 01:29PM

The Oilers losing 6-0 to Nashville on Friday night is not helping the powder keg of emotion that is the OilersNation right now. Twitter reads terribly with demands for everyone that collects a cheque from Kay-Z being immediately dismissed. The comments section here at the site stretches to infinity as people vent their rage and frustration with a team that looks to be writing off another year of NHL hockey.

Incredibly the only people not showing any rage or heart at this moment are the Oilers themselves - which has a lot to do with explaining why we are all in this mess in the first place.

MIKE BROWN SEEMS NICE

Lost in all of this losing has been the play of the newest Oiler Mike Brown. Now sure there are some gaps in his game - particularly at 5 on 5 - but it has also been refreshing to see someone in an Oilers jersey finishing checks (say what!?) standing up for his team mates (how is this possible) and getting the jackhammer going in spectacular fashion (oh baby.)

Assuming the Oilers ever figure out a way to win (they will) and start playing with some emotion (perish the thought) Mike Brown could well end up being a fan favourite in E-town among fans who are currently displaying roughly 150x the heart of many of their beloved Oilers.

Good on you Mike Brown. Beat someone else down if you can find the chance tonight and give us all a good cheer will you?

Thanks.

LINES

The Oilers are set to see the return of Horcoff, Hartikainen and Hemsky tonight. If the object of professional hockey was to dress the greatest number of players whose names begin with the letter H the Oilers would be heavy favourites to win tonight's match against the Hawks.

Sadly winning a hockey game has something to do with goal differentials at the end of 90 minutes of play or something. So the Oil will be forced to try and do that, instead of standing pat and letting the Hs speak for themselves. Chicago just ended an insane 24 game streak without a loss in regulation so you know they will be ready to play.

Per the Oilers twitter about 23 seconds before puck drop

PREDICTIONS

GAME DAY PREDICTION: The Oilers love to mess with our heads and just when you count them out they usually play out of their minds and draw us back in. Tonight will be one of those nights and they will win 4-3 forcing approximately 140,000 Oilers fans on twitter to reevaluate their entire line of thinking.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Mike Brown will fight someone and we will be happy, shadow boxing along the entire bout from the squalor of Wanye Manor.

NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION:  Minutes into the game GM Steve Tambellini will burst into the Oilers section of the press box. "I have finished my assessment of the team" he will breathlessly announce to all within earshot. "I can now conclude with great certainty the Oilers made a horrible mistake hiring me to be in charge."

He will receive a standing ovation from the entire world.

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#1 Bryan in SK
March 10 2013, 02:05PM
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Believe it or not, my wife bought me a set of salt and pepper shakers with the Oilers logo on them. Our front step is icy, so she told me to take the salt shaker out and put some salt on the step. I told her that I don't think it will help... it's been years since anything wearing an Oilers logo has been effective on ice.

(True story... honest.)

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#2 washed up
March 10 2013, 06:21PM
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I guess it was Horcoff all along. They were just missing el capitano............

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#3 Jay
March 10 2013, 01:54PM
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I'm in a good mood today. Not gonna ruin that by watching this team flail around the ice

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#5 Shane
March 10 2013, 08:11PM
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Before everyone starts hating, just keep in mind we beat the best team in the league in their own rink, where they were undefeated.

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#6 David S
March 10 2013, 01:42PM
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What the heck? I just woke up and it's already 1:00??? What sort of demon wizardry is this?

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#7 Oilers Coffey
March 10 2013, 01:48PM
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Can we reboot this Oilers Nation? Positive energy, positive karma! Afterall we are most likely all older than the boys (kids) on the ice. I'd still rather be cheering for this group than the Yellow and Red puke down the road, or any other team! Lets GO OILERS !!¡!!!!!¡!!!!!¡

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#8 Puritania
March 10 2013, 01:51PM
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Best NSOGDP of all time!*

*Of all time!

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#9 EricOG
March 10 2013, 01:53PM
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Fire TamboLoweMcT LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!!

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#10 Bryan in SK
March 10 2013, 02:01PM
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EricOG wrote:

Fire TamboLoweMcT LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!!

I'd add Olczyk to that list, too. I'd almost expect him to make an offer sheet to someone who has to clear waivers.

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#11 mr_nihilism
March 10 2013, 02:02PM
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I don't feel compelled to watch the game. On a much similar note, I didn't bother tuning in to the previous game either.

Maybe I'll record it just in case something magnificent happens, but otherwise meh.

After so many years of watching the Oil suck in glorious technicolor, I could use a break from the letdown and frustration.

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#12 rob
March 10 2013, 02:11PM
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Bryan in SK wrote:

Believe it or not, my wife bought me a set of salt and pepper shakers with the Oilers logo on them. Our front step is icy, so she told me to take the salt shaker out and put some salt on the step. I told her that I don't think it will help... it's been years since anything wearing an Oilers logo has been effective on ice.

(True story... honest.)

Awesome,made my day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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#13 A-Mc
March 10 2013, 02:23PM
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Horc is back. Harti is back. Hemsky is back!

Oil lose 4-0

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#14 106 and 106
March 10 2013, 02:46PM
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BOO-WAH - BLAH - Nice call, Wayne. The NSOGDP was comic genius, good to see your keeping the faith.

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#15 oliveoilers
March 10 2013, 03:36PM
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vetinari wrote:

The Hawks could ice their AHL affiliate tonight and likely still own the Oilers... however, I will be brave and predict that our scoring drought ends tonight... Hawks 5 Oilers 2...

Very unlikely, as the oilers are the best AHL team out there.

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#16 Bi-Curious Gord
March 10 2013, 04:35PM
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WHAT DO WE WANT? "PINK SLIPS"!! WHEN DO WE WANT THEM? "NOW"!! WHAT DO WE WANT? "PINK SLIPS"!! WHEN DO WE WANT THEM? "NOW"!!

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#17 Pharmboy
March 10 2013, 05:27PM
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NSOGDP: Oilers win 7-1 and in the post game news conference Quinville yells, "We've been Smurfed!"

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#18 mr_nihilism
March 10 2013, 06:05PM
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Holy spit. I'm glad I have this recorded otherwise I wouldn't believe it's already 4-0 Oil. Was it being criticized on TSN that motivated them, or did coach actually give a William Wallace speach? Unreal.

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#19 Butters
March 10 2013, 06:06PM
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It's 4-0 Oil, for the love of all holy, turn your TVs on, uncrumple your parade route maps, I have.

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#20 mr_nihilism
March 10 2013, 06:32PM
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So Horcoff DID call a meeting. Well better late than never. Can he only do that when healthy?

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#21 StHenriOilBomb
March 10 2013, 06:50PM
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you know the hockey gods have it in for you when your goalie gets hurt on the power-play.

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#22 Oilers4ever
March 10 2013, 07:47PM
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If anyone thinks Danis is an NHL level goalie I'll hit them over the head.. totally down too early on Kane's goal to make it 6-5... heaven forbid if Dubynk is hurt for any length... although his efforts show that the last few games he ain't NHL level either.. Where's Khabby when you need some stability.. Only the Oilers would figure out a way to blow a 4-0 lead.. Hawks will win this 7-6 in regulation and Oilers will get jack crap.. so what else is new...

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#23 oilman3
March 10 2013, 07:56PM
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trust the oilers to revert back to backing in and letting chicago take it to them. i am so sick of them backing away from the attack and just continually dumping it around and around the boards in their end. it's unbelievable to me that a team whose obvious biggest weakness is defense would keep dropping back into some sort of ill conceived defensive shell. i know it's not good to get caught up ice if the other team turns it over, but i'd rather see way more aggressiveness offensively where we actually have a chance to compete. defense is not going to win us games. finally, last night watching the flames getting spanked they mentioned how sutter doesn't let his team sit back with the lead because coaches that let their teams do that "aren't around very long." hmm

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#24 WOW
March 10 2013, 07:57PM
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are these retards uncoachable? Potter is pinching with a 1 goal lead and 8 mins left....garbage defense....useless...deserve what they get and that's a pile of loses.

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#25 Dennis
March 10 2013, 08:14PM
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@Shane

True enough, that's not an easy feat. There were some really bad plays this game but we managed to keep it together and come back when it was really needed to answer on their goals.

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#27 wiseguy
March 10 2013, 08:25PM
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We go from suffering $&it shows to criticizing wins?

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#28 David S
March 10 2013, 08:42PM
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Wanye wrote:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*wipes eyes*

You forgot...*Slap*

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#29 Light, Sweet, Crude
March 10 2013, 08:53PM
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wiseguy wrote:

That's why we follow sports teams instead of using street drugs. Same effects. Same price.

Ya, but did you ever do both at the same time? Feels like the 80's.

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#30 Eulers
March 10 2013, 09:29PM
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That was an amazing game! My girlfriend gave me tickets for Xmas. We happened to be sitting just in front of Stauffer and the 630 CHED broadcast team. When you listen to the highlights both on nhl.com and CHED, you can distinctly hear us as the only people screaming after the Oiler goals. Wow! Great Xmas present!

Now, we are drinking a beer to calm the nerves after watching the Oilers hold to a 4-0 first period lead for dear life!

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#31 treblecharger
March 10 2013, 01:30PM
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Oil pride rises, let's have a win. "Things can only get better"- Howard Jones

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#32 Lowetide
March 10 2013, 01:38PM
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Love the lines. Hahaha. That was good, I scrolled down and saw that and got a solid laugh. Thanks for that!

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#33 Senhor
March 10 2013, 01:39PM
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4-3 Oil? Seriously? The Oil will get pumped (sorry) big time. And K-Tamb can't wake up long enough to fix the problems. And I thought Kreuger was some motivational genius. Does not appear so. Season death for Seth. Who will make the pick?

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#34 freeze
March 10 2013, 01:39PM
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BEST NSOGDP EVER!!

But I highly doubt Tambi can come to any conclusions.

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#35 Time Travelling Sean
March 10 2013, 01:42PM
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Chicago, resigned and disappointed come out strong, but thank God we get a few bounces and are up 3-0 by the first.

As we insipidly progress through the game, we wait for Chicago to pounce, as the Lion stares down the frozen lamb, but the lion never strikes and we win 3-0.

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#36 David S
March 10 2013, 01:45PM
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Oilers in a commanding loss 5-2 as the Hawks feel bad for them and let the gas off 10 minutes into the first period. Krueger looks over at the Hawks bench, simultaneously nods his head and rubs his nose in that secret way in grateful, relieved acknowledgement.

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#37 Bryan in SK
March 10 2013, 01:50PM
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Sure glad the lockout cured my desire for NHL hockey! (Self-talk is wonderful.)

As long as Brown hangs a lickin' on Carcillo, I'm happy. That'll make the score irrelevant and I'd even dare to wear my Oilers golf shirt to work tomorrow.

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#38 Dog Train
March 10 2013, 01:57PM
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Chicago just got pumped by the Avs so they will probably be out for blood. Nice to see us getting some new blood into the lineup. Hopefully we score a goal tonight.

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#39 OilClog
March 10 2013, 02:03PM
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I'm hoping Brown starts a all out bench war, been awhile since the NHL has had a couple goalies duking it out at center ice.. For Dubnyks sake I hope emery isn't playing.

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#40 Spydyr
March 10 2013, 02:04PM
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NOT-SO-OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION:

Tambo runs into the coach's office shouting "Eureka, I finally figured out how the remote for the tv works.Changed the channel off of Holmes on homes.Turned to center ice.Man we suck.Let me call some other GM's and make some trades to help you out Ralph.As soon as I figure out how these new fangled cell phone things work"

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#41 rob
March 10 2013, 02:05PM
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horcoff gets hurt tripping over henskys laces in practice,hemsky gets hurt trying to help horcoff get up,lowe decides to dress and try to help this team,but he gets hurt when mike brown speedbags him for bringing him here!!!hall,ebs and rnh all laugh while searching porn on there phones inbetween shifts and yakapov spends the day trying to get a hawks jersey!!!! 8-2 hawks

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#42 Spurzey
March 10 2013, 02:11PM
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Stumbellini needs to be fired before the 1st game back at the Rex so his replacement(MacT) can begin to plan for the trade deadline and draft day. If this doesn't happen the Rexall faithful need to demand it. I'll start the chant.....fire tam-bo...fire tam-bo...fire tam-bo...

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#43 Spydyr
March 10 2013, 02:16PM
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Spurzey wrote:

Stumbellini needs to be fired before the 1st game back at the Rex so his replacement(MacT) can begin to plan for the trade deadline and draft day. If this doesn't happen the Rexall faithful need to demand it. I'll start the chant.....fire tam-bo...fire tam-bo...fire tam-bo...

Tambo and Lowe gotta go.

Repeat as necessary.

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#44 Spurzey
March 10 2013, 02:22PM
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Spydyr wrote:

Tambo and Lowe gotta go.

Repeat as necessary.

Agreed. New chant...fire tam-blow...fire tam-blow...fire tam-blow...

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#45 Jay
March 10 2013, 02:31PM
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Lame comment - WG

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#46 DigDeepNBleedBlue
March 10 2013, 02:47PM
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Things needed for tonight: 12 pack of inspiration, two books: Sun Tzu's 'The Art of War' and 'My Feet Arn't Ugly: A Girl's Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out' by Debra Beck, Snacks!, pen and pad of paper to draw during intermissions, and, of course, my lucky shirt.

Game Day Prediction: I'm freaking annihilated (please don't drink and write) by the end of the second.

Lets go Blue!

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#47 Dave "Killer" Carlson
March 10 2013, 02:53PM
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@Wanye

"Sadly winning a hockey game has something to do with goal differentials at the end of 90 minutes of play or something."

So that's why the Oilers keep losing! They're being deprived of the final 30 minutes of play every night! Given their improbable record when trailing heading into the final 20 minutes of the game this year (I think it's above .500), there would be a lot more W's in the column if minutes 71-90 were actually played!

Or maybe just a lot more GA's and we should be thanking the powers that be...

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#48 He Who Knows
March 10 2013, 02:53PM
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Hey Tambi, K-Lowe and the rest of you incompetent executives in the Oilers organization please do us all a favor and resign!!! I know K-Lowe you are not in this business to win popularity contests and your in it to win Stanley Cups lol but you suck the hind banana. You guys should go on Dragon's Den and see how they rip your business plan into pieces! Kevin Lowe should have been fired years ago and well Tambi should have never been hired years ago. I wonder what Tambi was doing all those years in Vancouver...oh wait he was also sucking the hind banana.

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#49 Todd
March 10 2013, 03:17PM
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Spurzey wrote:

Agreed. New chant...fire tam-blow...fire tam-blow...fire tam-blow...

I think if you want results you need to call out higher than Tambo. Chanting for Tambo's head is too predictable and expected. Ruff got fired in Buffalo because media started to question the owner personally. Owners don't like that. It trickled down and bam, Ruff was out.

So we need to start a Katz Sucks chant.

Or at a minimum target KLowe. "Lowe MUST go" is catchy. It would be great if KLowe was replaced, since new blood would certainly clean house and get rid of Tambo as well (2 for 1!!). But at least if we get a fire Lowe chant going it'll hit home and cause KLowe to get off his a## and do something. Best case scenario Katz hears about it and realizes its time to purge the entire mgmt staff.

#LoweMUSTgo

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#50 vetinari
March 10 2013, 03:24PM
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The Hawks could ice their AHL affiliate tonight and likely still own the Oilers... however, I will be brave and predict that our scoring drought ends tonight... Hawks 5 Oilers 2...

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