DRAFT UPDATE AND LAICH HATING

Wanye
March 11 2013 11:57AM

Another 2 weeks has gone by in the First Ever NationDrafts.com league of extraordinary drafting people. Rolls right off the tongue doesn't it? If you want to read about those who are kicking the crap out of us mere mortals and see some serious shade thrown at a Mr. Brooks Laich read on after the jump.

MINISTRY OF SQUEE SITS AT 519th PLACE

Ok seriously Brooks Laich. What the hell is going on with you? Every week I get my email from the draft and I rush to look at how you must have returned to action during the week and I have blind hope that I missed the highlights of your 10 point game in your glorious return despite the fact I watch SportsDesk approximately 1,506 times a day.

But  no. Somehow you have tricked Capitals medical staff into thinking you still can't return to action. Don't think I don't see you on twitter talking about Boondock Saints of all things. If you have the strength to watch a great movie that came out like 10 years ago you also have the strength to strap on your skates and carry the Ministry of Squee to victory.

We are going to write in a trade function for the playoff draft that allows teams in the draft to purchase a trade and the money goes to charity. Then we won't be at the mercy of these types of lazy millionaires nursing phantom injuries and screwing over hard working hockey drafters who had the wisdom to pick Thomas Vanek.

What do you think? Good idea? Bad idea? Hint: it's a great idea.

LEADERBOARD

Meanwhile high atop Mount Olympus there is some dissention among the Gods of NationDrafts. Longtime leader Frankenstein was passed by three - count em - three teams and now the cleverly named Bernie Nicholls' Blue Skate Blades has taken the lead.

If the season ended today ol' Bernie would win the $5,000 shopping spree from United Cycle and could have as many blue skate blades as that kind of cash would allow. Except that they haven't made blue skate blades since 1984. Or maybe they still do - what am I a rep for Bauer Hockey?*

RANDOM WINNERS

For this two week segment our random winner of a $25 Oodle Noodle Gift Certificate is a team aptly named Hot or Not. As a team that moved up from 498 to 369th place in the past two weeks you are clearly H-O-T. And the random winner generator here at Nation HQ seized his momentum and has awarded you a prize.

Too bad Brooks Laich can't win a prize for screwing over the Ministry of Squee for another two weeks. Cause he deserves something for his efforts.

*Not actual rep.

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Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me. Email me at wanyegretz@gmail.com or tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes.
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#2 toni_rajalepeno
March 11 2013, 12:04PM
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Who does Nicholls have serving as the catalyst to his meteoric rise to the top?

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#3 Soft Hands McSteeley - FIST Movement
March 11 2013, 12:14PM
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Wanye wrote:

BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKS

I PICKED BROOKS TOO :(

*FACEPALM* *FACEPALM* *FACEPALM*

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#4 The 'Real' Ron Burgundy
March 11 2013, 12:15PM
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@Wanye

Is there a way to see all the scores of each player in the different boxes?

I need to know who is makin' my heroes look like chumps.

Looks as though I shoulda took more than 45 seconds to pick this years edition of Burgundy's Hereos, or even included some expert scouting opinion, or did it sober.

*notices its almost noon and downs his last bailey's n'coffee before the lunch-hour switch to vodka and whatever*

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#5 Archaeologuy
March 11 2013, 12:17PM
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I also foolishly took Laich, but my team is in 206 spot. So...

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#6 Citizen Alpha
March 11 2013, 12:28PM
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@The 'Real' Ron Burgundy

This feature is on the TODO list. We hope to have it for future drafts. Maybe something for the playoffs? WE SHALL SEE, BY GOLLY.

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#7 Bernie Nicholls' Blue Skate Blades
March 11 2013, 12:32PM
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@toni_rajalepeno

Since I am now at the top, had to make an account. To answer your question, Filip Kuba

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#9 A-Mc
March 11 2013, 01:11PM
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A single trade is a fantastic idea! - A sucker whom also picked Brooks for his pool *Spit*

seriously. 1 trade. 5 thumbs up.

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#10 Toro
March 11 2013, 01:21PM
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I picked Kaberle and he is screwing me , shoulda known better then too pick that bum

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#11 unknown666
March 11 2013, 01:40PM
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i sort of knew laich was a d-bag hen i saw him hammered in calgary trying to pick up my cousins 18 year old girlfriend and another chick.

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#12 The 'Real' Ron Burgundy
March 11 2013, 01:49PM
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Wanye wrote:

No way man! If we are going to offer trades you can't reveal the points of every player in the box. Make people work for it and do their research! WORK LIKE BROOKS LAICH REFUSES TO DO

I dont mind doing interwebz research, But I also dont even know who was in the original boxes.

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#13 Phixieus666
March 11 2013, 01:56PM
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A-Mc wrote:

A single trade is a fantastic idea! - A sucker whom also picked Brooks for his pool *Spit*

seriously. 1 trade. 5 thumbs up.

would that trade include injured players?????

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#14 106 and 106
March 11 2013, 01:58PM
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@unknown666

Was he saying, "15 percent of the time, it works every-time" \ ]r=-=-0=\\][p;[]

";/' ?≥ o890] \"xzxl,÷

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#15 106 and 106
March 11 2013, 01:58PM
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@unknown666

Did he ask, "15 percent of the time, it works every time?"

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#16 VK63
March 11 2013, 02:44PM
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was top 30 but falling like a rock.

Must be all the quality research I do.

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#17 rubbertrout
March 11 2013, 02:48PM
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Sadly I was never able to trick the draft into accepting my credit card. Everyobdy else seems to think I have good credit BUT NOT THE VERY PLACE I WANT TO SPEND MY MONEY!!!

Damn you Wanye. Damn you.

Gregor's Kia would have been top 5 fo' shizzle.

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#18 rubbertrout
March 11 2013, 02:50PM
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unknown666 wrote:

i sort of knew laich was a d-bag hen i saw him hammered in calgary trying to pick up my cousins 18 year old girlfriend and another chick.

I don't exclude guys for a pool based on their D-Bag status if they can score points.

Patty Kane? Tyler Seguin? Evander Kane?

Potentially douches all but could still be on my squad.

Now a Flame . . .

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#19 yeeps
March 11 2013, 03:00PM
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Wishing you had picked Sheldon Souray yet there Wanye???

But seriously, someone needs to tell Byfuglien that he will get a brownie every time he gets a point. Pick it up you big cake loving man!!!

My Eunuchs are in 53rd spot

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#21 rubbertrout
March 11 2013, 03:47PM
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Wanye wrote:

We had mega strict credit card security on the last go round which probably meant your mailing address for the CC wasn't the same as what you entered into the draft.

For the playoffs draft we will be relaxing the security standards a bit. We may also publish Brooks Laich social insurance number and home address to serve him some comeuppance.

I still prefer to blame you. Or Brooks Laich. Just to be neighbourly.

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#22 Shane
March 11 2013, 04:19PM
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WHAT THE HELL IS SportsDesk??

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#23 Skidplate
March 11 2013, 05:55PM
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Even though I am only in #92 and #292 place and could use a boost, you can't change the rules in the middle of the draft man.

This ain't some sandbox.

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#24 Wäx Män Riley
March 11 2013, 05:58PM
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rubbertrout wrote:

I still prefer to blame you. Or Brooks Laich. Just to be neighbourly.

I thought you were an Oilers fan....

IT IS HORCOFF's FAULT!!!!!!

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