NATION PLAYOFF POOL UPDATE #5

baggedmilk
May 23 2014 02:48PM

ISuck

It's Friday again and I know how much you guys look forward to the weekly Nation Drafts update! As expected, I have absolutely nothing happening in my pool since the only player I have left is Drew Doughty. It's a sad state of affairs. I can't even blame Chris Kelly anymore since the Bruins are out. The only thing that would make me happy is if one of you had Dan Carcillo on your roster since he, quite possibly, got the dumbest 10 game suspension in the history of ice. Elbowing a linesman for reasons unknown? Genius!

The Leaders

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Rammertime has been overthrown! Look at you, Hemmercules, climbing up the ranks like a young Sylvester Stallone in 1993's Cliffhanger.  Last week, Hemmercules was in 2nd spot and Rammertime was 1st, but this week the roles have reversed.  It's like when John C. Reilly's character wanted to finish first in Talladega Nights but Ricky Bobby wouldn't let him. Well you didn't listen did you, Hemmercules? Even though you picked your team weeks ago, I applaud your efforts and commend you on your dominating ascent.

Speaking of domination, I really thought that the Montreal Canadiens were going to drop a turd on themselves as soon as Carey Price went down.  They got blown up in Game 1, played well and lost in Game 2, and barely did enough to win last night.  It surprises me that they're still in the series.  I'll be excited when they get bumped so that Habs fans can be as miserable as the rest of us.  Canada's only team? No. Canada's only chance left to have their fans be super annoying if they win.

So what if I'm bitter? You try being an Oilers fan.

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Please take a minute to soak in the mediocrity that is my playoff pool standings.  The sweet smell of failure is washing over me like the rising tide, and my hope of winning anything has gone the way of the spirit of Oilers fans. My chances are dead and unless Drew Doughty goes on a herculean run of doom there is no hope of reviving them.  If the playoff pool was a 90s movie, Shang Tsung would be sucking my soul through his dirty wizard fingertips. If I had a towel, I would throw it in. I would be more bummed if not for that sweet Mortal Kombat reference I just dropped. 

P.S. 

Dear Dan Carcillo,

You got a 10 game suspension for quite possibly the stupidest decision I've seen in a long time.  Brandon Prust threw a late hit and you were fired up about it, I get that.  The problem is that the linesman you threw the elbow at had nothing to do with it.  Prust's hit landed him the disciplinary hearing we all expected, but your cranium was too thick to realize that and now you very well could be done for the playoffs.

Congratulations on the missing chromosome (allegedly, in my opinion, of course)

Love,

-bm

94ea28cbbd0f9fe4153692bb3e38b40c
Twitter tyrant for @OilersNation - Resident Jackass - Poor vessel for carrying milk. Follow me on twitter (@jsbmbaggedmilk) - Instagram (@himynameisbaggedmilk) or email me at baggedmilk@oilersnation.com.
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#3 Hemmercules
May 23 2014, 03:10PM
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Woo hoo, I'm famous!!! At least until next game anyway. Funny thing is, I chose that team on a quick break at work with little or no thought other than some of the cash goes to charity and the Hawks will probably do well. Ghost ridin to the finish line!

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#4 MGD
May 23 2014, 06:14PM
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baggedmilk wrote:

I could use someone that knows a thing or two about winning!

I'm gonna Cheers my own comment in order to Cheers yours twice!

Thanks for making me chuckle this Friday afternoon!

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#5 Rob...
May 23 2014, 10:48PM
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Shame on TSN's web team. Oil Kings make it to the final by winning the longest Memorial Cup game ever, and it can't even make front page news on a non-NHL_playoff night, despite TSN owning the radio station that does Oil Kings play by play.

Great on the Oil Kings for persevering despite several setbacks over the last few games.

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#6 Anton CP
May 24 2014, 12:29AM
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Sorry this is off topic but I really just want to say: Go Oil Kings! We Want Cup! We Want Cup! We Want Cup! It is nice to cheer for a winner for a change.

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#8 Sorensenator
May 24 2014, 02:36PM
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Anton CP wrote:

Sorry this is off topic but I really just want to say: Go Oil Kings! We Want Cup! We Want Cup! We Want Cup! It is nice to cheer for a winner for a change.

Who trashes this comment, seriously?

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#9 David S
May 23 2014, 03:06PM
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Where the h3ll is Wanye these days???

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#10 vetinari
May 23 2014, 04:26PM
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@BM-- does this mean you get to draft first next year???

If I were you, I'd tell everyone that Kevin Lowe or Steve Tambellini helped pick your team!

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#11 Tim in Kelowna
May 23 2014, 07:57PM
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@baggedmilk I like your letter to Dan Carcillo. What a fool.

Go Oil Kings!

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#13 Harlie
May 23 2014, 10:06PM
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ROAR OILKINGS!!!

How Lazar, How Lazar http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2cMG33mWVY

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#14 Chainsawz
May 23 2014, 07:21PM
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I'm shocked anyone is lower than my sad sack team.

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#15 Sorensenator
May 23 2014, 11:35PM
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zangetsu wrote:

Call Lowe, he might just give you a contract. Then you can sit on your hands all day.

I tried sitting on my hands one time literally, they went all fuzzy and then I started getting all kinds of crazy ideas

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#16 zangetsu
May 23 2014, 11:22PM
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Call Lowe, he might just give you a contract. Then you can sit on your hands all day.

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