June 11 2014 01:42PM
When I'm not finding ways to give away Wanye's Oodle Noodle GCs or planning my Nation takeover, I'm a very deep thinker. I often stare out the window and think of the day's hot topics. I come up with solutions to the world's problems, theories on macro economics, and upsetting realization that I'm still an Oilers fan despite my better judgement. Today, I present the first edition of baggedmilk's 3 thoughts - take that Elliotte Friedman!
#1. CRAIG RAMSAY ENDS THE REIGN OF KELLY BUCHBERGER... KINDA
You know how a weatherman can incorrectly predict the weather for months on end and it never seems to affect his job? Kelly Buchberger is the Oilers' weatherman. This guy has been around since the dawning of time, and regardless of how many head coaches have come and gone, he's stayed on the bench through it all. It's amazing when you think about it.
Since joining the Oilers coaching staff for the 2008-09 season, the Oilers record in the Buchberger era is 170-233-55. Lest we forget, in that same time span the Oilers have gone through 383 head coaches. It's amazing that the guy has lasted through so many regimes. You can't tell me that not one of those head coaches didn't want him gone? Even when he does get fired, he's not really fired. Buchberger gets another job in player development, which to me seems like he'll be watching TV, sending notes, and collecting pay cheques. The only thing that would make sense is that he is holding some kind of information over management's head. Is it nudes? I bet it's nudes. Nudes totally work -- how do you think I got the job here?
Craig Ramsay, we salute you for being able to do what so many before you have failed to do. Now don't screw this up, or you'll likely be fired after one season, as is tradition around these parts.
#2. WE KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT THE DRAFT
As the days go on, and the draft articles pile up, it's a punch to the mind that we're in the same position after another season. The season started out with so much promise and hope, only to end unofficially in November. If the rebuild has a rock bottom, this season has to be close to it. This season was like being told you're getting a new car, but that it's a PT Cruiser. Instead of spending January, February, and March getting ramped up for a playoff push, we were all looking at the standings and draft rankings again. At this point, after 8 years of crap, I'm surprised that most of us aren't being paid to give our draft expertise - lord knows we're capable.
I bet if you ask most fans of Oilers Nation they would be able to give you an opinion on who the Oilers should draft, what their strong points are, and what they need to work on. This annoys the hell out of me. I want to go into a summer not knowing, or caring, about who the Oilers are going to draft that summer. I don't even want to have an idea. It would actually be awesome if we went into a summer without a first round pick because we traded it at the deadline for a playoff push rental. The idea that most Oilers fans are amateur draft connoisseurs is not only depressing, it's like a yearly kick to the balls of everyone that supports this team. It'll be a good day when none of us have to care about the draft.
#3. I'M HAPPY THE PLAYOFFS ARE ENDING
Another NHL season is winding down and I thought it would make me sad, but in reality it's making me happy. If the Kings can close out the Rangers tonight, I won't have any hockey to watch and it's a relief! Maybe I'm just bitter that the fans of 16 other teams had something to cheer for beyond the regular season (read October). As the playoffs went on, I got more and more bitter about other teams passing (and lapping) the Oilers in terms of development and consistency. Look at Detroit -- there are college kids that have not lived a day in their life without knowing the Detroit Red Wings as a playoff team.
Back to our garbage fire, the last time the Oilers played a hockey game was April 12th. Almost 2 full months have passed since we had a 1-3-1 power play to complain about. To make matters worse, the playoffs have been fantastic to watch. The problem with the Oilers being so bad and the playoffs being so good is that it shows us just how far the Oilers actually are from competing. If anything, I'd say the Oilers are closer to relegation than they are to competing for a playoff spot.
The hard part of going into the summer is the feeling of excitement that will surely return as the season gets closer. The draft will come and go, as will free agency, and a lot of us will have that glimmer of hope return that this will be the year that the Oilers finally end the drought. Delusion is a powerful thing. Now that I think of it, maybe I should change my mind and hope the playoffs go on forever? Look what this team has done to me! #ThanksKevin