GDB12: Logo: 1 Wanye: 0

So as you know, the Oilers play the Blue Jackets tonight in Columbus at 5:30pm MST. What you don’t know is that we have a terrible confession to make. We must warn you—anyone who thinks that we are a “sentient being” may not want to read on as we are revealed to be a blathering idiot.

Last night we were watching the election in the US—we will spare you the tale of how happy we are with the results—and the topic quickly turned to the Oil and the week ahead. We go to the main page of the Nation to see the upcoming game and we see this logo:

This was the exact moment when one of the most terrible realizations of our lives hit us in the face like a Mike Tyson uppercut–pre crazy days.

Ready for this?

For however long the Blue Jackets have had this god awful logo—we have believed it was the All Star Game logo. We are that stupid. “But Wanye, don’t you watch sports highlights?” Yeah we do, but whenever Columbus comes on the screen we generally let our mind wander to other topics like monkey knife fights and rocket shoes. Seriously, what happened to this logo?

What happened to the dink mascot “Stinger?” Is he still around?

Yep, life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and take a look around once in awhile—you could miss it. Why on Earth would Columbus adopt a near identical logo to the All Star Game logo? Is the NHL Logo Design Department™ seriously running that thin on ideas?

Logo Guy 1: “Hey Gary—we need a logo for Columbus and we need it stat! That dink mascot was just caught driving down (insert Columbus road name here) with a dead hooker in the trunk. He needs to disappear—and fast.”

Logo Guy 2: “Uh… Uh… (runs around in a panic)”

Logo Guy 1: “Damn it Gary—now isn’t the time for panic! We need a logo and quick!”

Logo Guy 2: “We could… uh… (soils himself under extreme pressure)”

Logo Guy 1: “Ok think Richard, think. (massages head) Remember your training. You are the creative force that designed all 14 of the Phoenix Coyotes logos. You know you have it in you somewhere to design quality logos in a fraction of the time.”

(Spies all star game logo on the wall.)

Yep, it must have happened just like that.

I hate you Columbus Blue Jackets logo. I hate you so much.

  • During happy time goat boy is firing at about 200 beats per minute.

    Capra hircus, left to their own devices, compete for rank, and the highest ranking males have access to mate with the females. Males fight by butting heads until one competitor surrenders. Until goat boy is un-concust, he won't have to worry about his heartrate during happytime.

  • Wanye Gretz

    Ender –

    That isn't actually me. A photo of me requires a $100 fee to be paid to my Swiss bank account months in advance. Damn it I'm so pretty.

    GSC –

    Good to have you on board sir. I am happy to know we have a man on the ground tomorrow in PIT. Any thoughts/pics you have from down there would be welcome.

    Chaz –

    "Denis Grebeshkov has been scoring even strength points at a fine rate, one point every 38 minutes of play"

    One point every 38 minutes of play? What the hell kind of unit of measurement is that? Did you know that Tom Gilbert skated over 11 kms last game and his body temperature was 34 degrees at one point in the second period?

    No thanks – I'll pass.

    The day Grebs stops giving pucks away like they are Twizzlers at Hallowe'en I will start to believe. Until that day it's nothing but 24/7/365 goat jokes for all.

  • Jason Gregor

    Speaking of Grebs, he won't play tonight. His melon still isn't 100% so he is out. Expect Smid to play with Gilbert again and Staios with Strudwick.

    Sounds like Stortini might be in tonight in place of MacIntyre.

    And Roloson is in.

  • Chaz

    Hey Wayne,

    What do you think of the following comment David Staples made about Grebs?

    "On defence, Denis Grebeshkov has been scoring even strength points at a fine rate, one point every 38 minutes of play, while his defensive work has also been strong, at least according to this stat, just one goal-causing error for every 76 minutes he has played."

    I know you're not a big fan, but it seems like I'm not the only one to think he's not playing BAAAAAAAAAAAAd. Ouch. That was weak….

    Anyways, as I said in pre-season give my boy Grebs some time and patience. I know he makes bonehead moves at times, but I really feel he'll develop into an allstar. If not, I guess he could always apply for the vacant mascot position in Cloumbus.

    I'm not saying, I'm just saying….

  • GSC

    As an Ohio Oiler fan, I must say I'm shocked and appalled by this lack of info in this situ (thanks to the Commish of the MTL for the vocabulary).

    Obviously, the flag is the State of Ohio flag. The star represents the Union army (Blue Jackets) during the Civil War. It could also represent the fact that Columbus is Ohio's capital city (usually marked by a star on a map), but let's not get too complicated.

    In any event, it beats the hell out of that retarded neon green bug that forced the club to utilize neon green in their equipment (mainly gloves) and in doing so made them look even more like a AHL team (as if their on-ice performance wasn't enough to convince the masses).

    I wish I could be in C-Bus for the game tonight, but alas I'll be in attendance tomorrow in Pittsburgh. Either way, 3-4 points out of another back-to-back road set would taste pretty good…

  • The mascot did not actually disappear. He's in plain view at all times. Unfortunately for "Stinger" Ken Hitchcock decided to roll him in batter and sauces, pan fried him and polished it off with a nice frosty Pilsner.