I sat through the entire game last night in glorious HD. High-def was the only thing glorious about it. I thought about talking about how watching the Oil play last night was like watching one of those old-timey football board games where the players just vibrate around the board and don’t really do anything. Those of you who saw it know exactly what I’m talking about.
Instead, though, I’m going to talk about something related to the Oilers. Something that might make you feel a little bit better about the shitanus™ effort displayed by a team that cannot afford to phone it in and lose to teams like the Blue Jackets. Hey, there’s got to be something out there to get me excited about this team, right? Gah!
Tweets ‘n Twits
It would appear that Steve Tambellini and Craig MacTavish have Twitter account. Oh sure, the people behind these accounts are clearly not the real deal. But I imagine that the ghosts in the machines are at least partially able to channel the thoughts of MacT and Tambo. To wit…
Quotes from Twitter MacT
Planning the lines for tonights game using my patented pull names out of a hat method. Right now Macintyre, Gagner and Souray are 1st line.
Told the guys today that if we want to make the playoffs we’re gonna need to play with more jam. That fat bastard Penner asked what flavor.
Quotes from Twitter Tambo
Thinking of sending Gagner to junior. I mean junior high school, not hockey. Kid thinks Narnia is a real place. Sucks at hockey, too.
It’s a good thing the game versus Calgary is here tonight. Harvey the Hound scares the bejeezus outta me.
Now these clearly aren’t the real deal (wouldn’t it be boring if they were, though? Stock comments aimed at helping angry fans keep the faith they’ve long-since lost). And I’m certain that when Allan Watt, VP of Oilers Marketing, finally wises up to these, he’ll shit a brick or six and then hire up a team of rabid lawyers to destroy the people behind these accounts. But at least these twitterers make an otherwise god-awful game/season/hockey team something interesting again.
If anyone needs me, I’ll be under my desk crying tears of oil.