Target Practice

With three games in thirteen days the Oilers are seeing about as much action as Bea Arthur at a Golden Girls DVD release party. Fortunately for the Oilers, their 10-2 shitanus™ hockey festival against the Sabres occurred during the middle of this dry spell and they can now schedule unlimited private team meetings without “an actual game” to get in the way.

With nothing on the horizon until a game against Minnesota on Friday, the citizens of the Nation are left with little else to do but what we do best:

Engage in rampant, unsubstantiated speculation on subjects we have only a fraction of the information required to make qualified opinions. Hasn’t stopped us before; why should it now? And what do we personally want to talk about?

Captain Ethan Moreau

Fig 1: Ethan Moreau as indicated by the blue arrow.
Fig 1: Ethan Moreau as indicated by the blue arrow.

There has been some commentary flying around on here about comments Moreau made to CTV regarding team preparedness, ice-hockey tactics and the like. We looked for about 11 seconds to find a copy of the clip but couldn’t find it and gave up. Instead we started listening to this sweet jam:

Yeah America. We can do magic. That’s some good old-timey jammery. What year is this song from? 1927? Brownlee? You remember the band America, we bet. Are they pre-1900? “You’re the one who can put out the fiiiiiire.” Of course. It makes perfect sense.

Anyway back to Moreau

We personally like Moreau a lot due to his ability to clap in time whilst embarrassing Principe in a PPV post-game interview as well as his leadership and on ice skillery. Plus, by our count he is on pace for 18-14-32 points this season. That ain’t not all bad for a guy that haters call out on a weekly basis as being a bum. ‘Tis no bum this Moreau and a quote that we were able to find on Canoe.ca should speak to that:

“If you can imagine how a fan feels or a coach or management feels, it’s always worse for the player,” said captain Ethan Moreau, after a nearly two-hour skate. “We’re out there responsible for the loss. As bad as people feel, as frustrated as people are, you can’t match the way we feel. It’s our livelihood, it’s what we live with every day. A lot of our mood is determined by how we play on the ice and when you lose like that, it’s tough. It’s not fun walking around the city, trust me.”

Now firstly that is exactly the kind of manning up we loves to see from the man wearing the “C.” Secondly, we kind of feel for Moreau here. Imagine going to Macs to get yourself two Orange Gatorade G2s and some Doritos and the lady in front of you turns around and a wave of recognition sweeps across her aging face. Half the time you will get a very positive reaction. “Oh pardon me, sir,” she may breathlessly squeal in your face as she makes a beeline for the door, loins completely aflame.

Or it could go the other way and Shopper Sharon merely gathers her carton of Players Light King Size and walks directly into you on the way out the door. That’s some harsh shit — particularly when you are doing something as innocent as going to get yourself some G2 Dorito goodness. We always kind of think that it’s not necessarily the attention that grinds on Oilers living their lives in Edmonton but rather the wild swings in emotion. Half the time your neighbours shovel your snow for free, the other half of the year they allow the dog to do his nastiness on your front porch.

Note this chart that maps the emotional state of Oilers fans. It’s all over the map, Nation. The dizzying highs, the terrifying lows, the creamy middles… Don’t get us wrong, when the Oil put on an absolute five-alarm gong show like they did against the Sabres they deserve to have looks of death from even the smallest toddlers old enough to wear a “Oilers Draft pick 2025” T-shirt. But it must be a supreme pain in the ass for a true Champion like Moreau to look around the room and see punk-ass kids that only care about the name on the back of the jersey and couldn’t give two squirts about the logo on the front.

In our exulted opinion as a direct descendant of the 15th Archduke of Austria-Hungary, we think that we need to keep in mind who we should be roasting on a daily basis. When the hard-working grinders were shown the door for various reasons (Smith, Smyth, Reasoner, Stoll and Greene) it was with great fanfare in most cases. Many good, hard-working citizens of the Nation laughed aloud when they read the good news that so-and-so had been traded and had visions of the brighter tomorrow that is around the corner dancing in their heads.

And in some cases the moves have been for the better. Visnovsky certainly brings the talent and his A-game on most nights. He and Souray are scoring at an eye popping pace and are fast becoming cornerstones of the team. But the penalty killing blows severely and no one had the presence of mind to go out and absolutely end the life of a Sabre at the end of the worst home-ice loss in franchise history.

So as we continue on in this wasteland of No Oilers Games coming off a 10-2 loss, let’s have some perspective on who we should riddle with Nation bullets and should live to see another day. Dennis Grebeshkov for example? One of the worst goats ever to wear an Oilers jersey. What was his plus minus against Buffalo? Yeah exactly.

You baaaaaaaastard, Grebs.

  • I'm a Scientist!

    I think there is a level of sarcasm that Wanye is trying to use here. I'm not sure of it's inner workings but that's how I take it.
    As for Hemsky wanting out…he's been here long enough and has gone from a bit player trying to learn MacT's game to finally clicking at the pace we all thought he would and is the undisputed offensive leader of this team. Why after one bad lose would he want out? When he was injured every player and coach interviewed commented on how important getting Hemmer back was. This is his team and I'd like to think that if it came down to Hemmer vs. a coach or another player, management would accommodate #83 first.

  • I'm a Scientist!

    I guess I'm getting gun shy Ender. Ever since the Pronger thing I've been paranoid. I can't even imagine how screwed we'd be if Hemmer DID want to go.

    So, he doesn't, right? right? anyone?…

  • I'm a Scientist!

    Chaz wrote:

    I think it may be time for [Wanye]and Grebs to kiss and make up . . .

    Amen. The guy is a long way away from the top of my trade list.

    @ oilmoose:
    Find a sense of humour; it's obviosly tongue-in-cheek.

    @ Wanye Gretz:
    What is with this unhealty obsession of yours with The Golden Girls? You've gotta let them go, man . . . they're gonna die soon (if they haven't already). Better to make the break beforehand, don't you think . . .

  • I'm a Scientist!

    Grebs is the biggest oiler goat ever?

    Aside from the fact he was EVEN in that stinker and his play has greatly improved this season :

    does no-one remember '86 ?

  • I'm a Scientist!

    I don't know how you can call Grebeshkov "one of the worst goats ever to wear an Oilers jersey" when in the past we've had real goats like MA Bergeron or Cory Cross or worse yet SCOTT FERGUSON!! I like Grebeshkov. While he does make a few to many ill-advised passes, he has really improved from the where he was at the beginning of last year. I see a lot of potential with him. Think of what the Oilers defence used to look like during our "not so glory years". He is miles above any of the goats that played than. You tell me who you'd rather have Denis Grebeshkov or Drew Bannister?

  • I'm a Scientist!

    ""We sell out every night, so no complaints as long as we continue to do that," he said."

    Yikes. Id like to see the whole clip to see what he said in its entirety, but the impression I get is. "We dont need to apologize to the fans who were at the Buffalo game, because we sell out anyways.

  • I'm a Scientist!

    Hey Wayne. What did Grebs do to you to make you such a fan? Other than the one to two brain cramps a game which result in a major give-away, I still don't see why you loath him as you do, although I must admit those moments do make me cringe.

    He has 22 points, is plus 5, and is a $1.5 M player. Compare that with Staios who has 7 points is minus 5 and makes 2.9 M.

    I think it may be time for you and Grebs to kiss and make up, and focus your wrath upon the real under-achievers on this team. (Hint: Their names rhyme with Devin Clowe and Greg McRaddish.)