Bonecrushing NHL Hockey played out by two also rans in the Western Conference: one currently last place in the league and the other trailing a playoff spot by a measly 10 points with 8 games to play. Did we mention that it’s also a matinee? Ooooh yeah. Sign us up for this tilt s’il vous plait.

The Oilers are actually flailing down the homestretch to their fourth consecutive non playoff season at a reasonable pace, winning 3 of their last 4 games on the recent homestand defeating decent teams in the process with wins over Vancouver, San Jose and Detroit.

Of course the Oilers haven’t actually been that terrible at home this season – their 16 wins on home ice puts them ahead of St. Louis (13 wins), Florida (15 wins) and ties them with both the Bruins and the Rangers.

But on the road – FAIL

Really Oilers? You have eight wins on the road all season? Remember when you rattled off five straight road wins to start December? Remember when it was the Blues you defeated for that epic fifth win in a row? How does that translate into an 8 road win season with eight games to play exactly?

Well, this must just be part of the fun of a 30th place season we suppose. Oh how we laugh following this squadron don’t we Nation?


According to Tom Renney, Devan Dubnyk will get the start against the Blues this afternoon and Sam Gagner is still out with a bum hip and didn’t make the road trip at all. Heh heh, "bum hip" – how do these terms come into widespread use?

Game time in less than an hour. We will be watching because hey, it’s what we do. And we actually will predict the 9th epic win on the road this season.


"The Oilers might look like an automatic two points, but they haven’t laid down as their disappointing season draws to a close."

 — Always inspirational and hilariously out of touch Oilers website.


  • Ender

    Prediction: Oilers win 3-1. The Oilers have gotten past not caring and have actually found something to play for somehow. (Don't question it; you'll screw it up.) The Blues are still getting used to the fact that golf season is just around the corner. This works out well for anyone betting against the Vegas oddsmakers.

    Go Oil!

          • I nominate our first round pick in 2014 as the new Captain of the Oilers for the 2010/2011 season. That Captain wont take penalties late in games, demand trades, or drive his Lamborghini through a Tim Horton's drive thru 70 miles an hour over the limit while under the influence. Leadership will improve ten fold next season.

        • Whitney. Identified that the team accepted losing, saying so showed he did not tolerate it, showed more balls in one quote than thecaptainethanmoreau has shown all year. No brainer.

          By the way, one Oiler loss or one Leaf win guarantees Seguin or Hall will be an Oiler come June 24th. If the Oil run the table (yea, right) and the Leaf's drop all theirs (possible) the Oil will finish in 29th. One loss, they call Seguin's name.

          • Ender

            You're kidding, of course. I know we wouldn't really be advocating giving the C to someone who's been an Oiler for less than a month and never worn a letter in the NHL.

            And while we are at this point pretty much assured of a top-2 pick (man, 14 points behind 29th spot; how's that for putting the exclamation point on suckage?), I won't rest easy until I actually hear the name come from the podium. I still have nightmares of Tambi stepping up and smiling big while he says:

            "With the first overall pick in the 2010 NHL Entry Draft, the Edmonton Oilers are proud to select, from the Edmonton Oil Kings, defenseman Mark Pysyk."

            [stunned silence]

          • Not really kidding about Whitney. Who else would you give the C to? Moreau doesn't deserve it, Horcoff probably does but the media would tear him apart because of his recent play, Pisani will be gone, Souray has most likely increased his list of acceptable trade locations to 29 cities, who's left? Penner? Gagner? Stortini? At least Whitney has the nuggets to be the first Oiler this year to stand up and say what the problem with the team is. There are worse choices.

            And given some of the previous first round selections, Pysyk wouldn't be too bad. Let's just hope it isn't Anatoli Smaksomnutzov, Ucrapistans answer to Toby Pederson.

  • The Real Scuba Steve

    I swear there are bloggers on that web site pretending to be fans who really work for the Oil PR department, There are some hilarious posts in the site.

  • The players and media entrance at the rink in St. Louis is a gauntlet that stinks like a combination of puke, stale piss and unwiped arse and is frequented by some hardcore street people and druggies bumming money. They are flat out scary.

    One of only two times I ever got to stepping in fear on a road trip was at that entrance when, about six years ago, two aggressive guys who looked like they'd just crawled out of a dumpster took an interest in my computer bag as I left the building to go back to the hotel.

    "What's in the bag, Bub?" said one of them, blowing his nose on his sleeve at the same time. "Uhhh, just a computer," I said, backing up. "Let's see it, Bub," he says. "Uhh, no," I said, looking for a cop (fat chance). "Let's f*ckin'see it, Bub," he yells, taking another step toward me as a couple of other rubs, one packing the remnants of a wooden cane, joined the first two . . .

    F*ck, I hadn't picked 'em up and put 'em down like that since sports day in Grade 7. Did the four blocks back to the hotel in about 10.8.

  • The Real Scuba Steve

    An oilers loss and leafs win would officially lock the oilers into 30th place. So depressing and satisfying at the same time. If we are to be subjected to this garbage all season we may as well get a reward for it.

    • OilFan

      The Oilers loss would have to had to have been in regulation time to get the 30th place clinch…but looks like we'll have to wait for another day…Leafs lost in OT but got a point….

      We can still catch the Leafs, Hurricanes and Panthers as it stands right now…but one point lost by the Oil and/or one point gained by Carolina and Florida and that takes them out of the mix…

      With one period to go in the game vs. the Blues the magic number for the Leafs to beat us is 3 points…

  • So is Brownlee going to get ahold of MacT to see if Penner is getting the invite to the World Championships? If he does will he go? I am actually surprised that TSN did not have Penner as an invite, the guy came close to being named to the Oly team.

  • Pajamah

    Oh, no Oilers game for me

    Hot Rod is on showcase, and I'd be doing Andy Samberg and Jorma Taccone a huge disservice if I didn't watch

    Bill Hager and Danny McBride are also in said movie, if you haven't seen it, I don't like you

  • Ender

    Well that officially takes Carolina and Florida out of the mix…it's just the Leafs now with a big magic number of one point…either gained by the Leafs or lost by the Oil and we are guaranteed a top 2 pick 🙂

  • Who takes the fall this season ? Are the Oilers going to deal their first round pick ? The serial tradgedy lives on – get your seasons tickets for next season and watch this gripping tradgedy unfold . Hurry , only a limited number of season tickets are still available for next seasons version of "Boys Under the Bus ", first chapter "Frozen On/In Ice"! Horror flick producer extraordinare -S. Tams and K.Lowe .