THE MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION

A buddy of ours emailed us at 7:53 AM this morning with a threatening message: "Damn it Wanye, get off your fence and tell us who you think the Oilers should pick in the draft. And don’t bother me with any statistical information and logical reasoning as to why. Give us all the real deal." (underlining his work)

This must be how Chairman of the Federal Reserve Ben Bernanke must feel every day. People waiting on your every word, knowing that your thoughts on matters can move industries, creating and destroying fortunes in its wake.

But that is the life of a blogger we suppose. It ain’t all round the clock room service and ladies hiding under your bed to surprise you. It’s also back breaking responsibility and pressure too.

*heavy dramatic sigh*

All right Tambo. We know you read this site hourly and use it as a baseline sanity check for all of your decisions.

You ready?

Pick Tyler Seguin.

There you go. Look how many hearts we have around that picture. That is a solid start to our reasoning.

Here are the other reasons that this is the move:

ANTI HALL

Here are some reasons we don’t like Taylor Hall as much as we love Tyler Seguin:

1. Taylor Hall is one cocky dude. Apparently some of the Oilers took Hall and Seguin out after their press conferences a few weeks back. The consensus was that Hall was quite the cock sure fellow and left some of our current beloved Oilers thinking he was a hair big for his britches.

Now you could say that a two time Memorial Cup MVP who is slated to go first overall in the Entry Draft has every right in the world to be cocky. And you would be right – so this could be forgiven for the time being. But also understand that the instant Hall arrives Chez Rexall, all of his prior accomplishments go straight out the window. How will he deal with that?

2. Taylor Hall is a bit wussy and difficult to find on a map. For those of you that think Taylor Hall is what-you-see-is-what-you-get, think again. In addition to exceling at the Ice Hockey, Taylor Hall is also the main gate of entry at Vassar College in Poughkeepsie, NY.

According to its website it is "a highly selective, coeducational liberal arts college. Consistently ranked among the top liberal arts colleges in the country, Vassar is renowned for pioneering achievements in education, for its long history of curricular innovation, and for the beauty of its campus.

Taylor Hall incorporates the main gateway of the college and connects to the Frances Lehman Loeb Art Center on one side and van Ingen Hall on the other.Taylor is decorated on the exterior with elaborate carvings of artists and mythical creatures."

Mythical creatures? A liberal arts college? This is who is going to lead our team? No way Ray. Just look at this diagram of your precious "Taylor Hall" all tucked away down there in yellow.

3. Taylor Hall has the tendency to get run the eff over. Not to say that Hall isn’t supremely talented, but durability should also be a prime concern when selecting a franchise player. Acres of print have been devoted to Hall’s tendency to skate with his head down and has been crushed numerous times in recent seasons.

That may be very well and good in Junior, when malleable 17 year old bones can bounce back quickly. But if he doesn’t learn to be more aware of his surroundings, the Doug Murray’s of the world could put the poor fella onto the IR for a good stretch.

PRO SEGUIN

Here are some reasons that we love Tyler Seguin in a manner that is completely inappropriate:

1. Tyler Seguin is down to earth, personable and genuine. At the very same type of social mixer that branded Hall as cocky, the Oilers that went out on the town with Seguin seemed to think that he is a super grounded kid who is quite charismatic.

Pair that with his recent performance at the NHL Combine – self depreciating, witty and oh-so-cute – and it seems that Mr. Seguin has a bit of a better attitude than his running mate. This won’t matter one bit if he can’t put the biscuit in the basket, but it is certainly worth noting. A team player is key in this rebuild.

2. Seguin has done more with less. Of course the Spitfires won back to back Memorial Cups. How hard is that when you have the likes of Cam Fowler, Troy Passingham and Philipp Grubauer on your squad? Not to mention they have Taylor Hall, who is unreal and will probably go first overall in the 2010 Entry Draft.

But Tyler Seguin? Who does he have exactly on the Plymouth Whalers? Karsten Pankhurst? Matt Hackett? Scott Wedgewood? Go look these guys up and see how much help they provided Seguin last year.

Hall has long had the luxury of playing with a lot of fire power on his side. Seguin has had to manufacture line mates from string and gum and has still managed to get himself into this position on the eve of the draft. As a fellow who has watched Ales Hemsky go sans linemates for most of his career it is clear that the Oilers aren’t exactly the team you would expect to build solid lines around you quickly – if ever.

Hall could get himself frustrated quick with a long track record of success and linemates he could count on. The 30th place Oilers aren’t exactly overflowing with quality for the next couple of years. A guy who is used to a solid cast of B linemates could find the Oil moderately less frustrating to play for.

3. At first glance, Seguin is almost a year younger than Hall. This is our favourite stat people have been throwing out in the leadup to the Draft. "Seguin is a 92 and Hall is a 91. He is almost a year younger." Taylor Hall was born Nov. 14, 1991.   Tyler Seguin arrived a little over two months later on Jan. 31, 1992. In both instances we were 11 years old and cared only for Super Mario 2.

Bottom line: they are the same age. Don’t even try this line of reasoning.

FINAL SUMMARY AND MUSIC VIDEO

In the end pick Seguin and work out a deal to let Boston think they are getting away with something and trade them the first pick. It makes sense.

Of couse, if Tambo goes the other way and picks the two time Memorial Cup Winner, all bets are off and we will pretend none of this ever happened and that we have loved Hall since Day One.

So Tambo – in the words of L’il Jon – what you gon do?

SQUEEE!

    • Ender

      My boss does not know.

      If he did, by tomorrow I would be trying to trick Wanye into allowing me to write for the Nation. The second his signature dried, I would immediately submit enough articles to cover my mortgage.

      Overall, I think it’s best my current boss never hears about OilersNation. And if he ever does, well, that is why superheroes have secret identities. Poor Travis Dakin. The day his boss finds this site, he is sooooo screwed . . .