You Paid For This?

It never fails to amaze me how many people defend Kevin Lowe or any other member of the Oilers brass. It really doesn’t. They could drive a truck right through some people’s front window or ruin Sunday dinner by showing up loaded and hitting on the lady of the house and still some people will call it part of the plan. But can we agree that paying money to show people how dumb you are in an ad is the wrong way to go about defending inept management?

Today somebody bought an Ad in the Edmonton Sun to post this message:

Lowe Ad

The mind, it boggles.

TO THE KEVIN LOWE…FACEBOOK GROUP

For this ridiculous waste of time to even make any sense one has to remember the last time someone ridiculously wasted money in a Print Ad about Kevin Lowe. The Lowe Must Go Facebook Group paid for an ad to appear in the Sun on December 19th. It was pathetic too. The Lowe Must Go fanatics are a bunch of whiners on Facebook who apparently have too much money to spend and felt like paying for something that anyone with a working internet connection could have done for free. 

If you aren’t sure what their platform is and want to know more about their thoughts on the Oilers the Lowe Must Go Facebook Group believes that Lowe must go. Yeah. The name is pretty self explanatory. There isn’t much else. 

At any rate some loon with too much money and not enough brains decided to post his rebuttal to them in the Sun, not that you would really know that because he apparently can’t be bothered to properly address his “Rebuttal” to the Kevin Lowe Must Go Facebook Group. Here’s a quick tip to future rebuttaleers: make sure you accurately tell people who you are indeed rebutting unless your goal is to look like that old man who can’t figure out how to post on Facebook so he just takes out a full ad in the paper.

SO THIS IS WHAT IT HAS COME TO

He said, entirely unironically. 

How is it possible for someone to miss the mark so badly here? Where is your self-awareness? This line sounds like something said on a soap opera after Drake Heatherington discovers that his wife has left him for his evil twin brother in a bid to take full control of the family business (which is a wig manufacturing plant). 

So this is what is has come to, Laura? First me, now my evil twin? Who won’t you manipulate to get your hands on our wiggy fortune?

STOP RUINING CHRISTMAS!

Grinch

“An official paid advertisement calling for Kevin Lowe’s neck – in the Christmas season, no less.”

Spare me while I throw up some eggnog. It was bad enough that the evil and all powerful Lowe Must Go group took out an ad in a poorly read paper, but did they have to it in the Christmas season? I mean have some class.

The Oilers themselves always honour the spirit of the holidays, which is why they fired Dallas Eakins on December 15th, just 4 days prior to the ad going live. Everybody knows the Christmas season doesn’t start until at least December 16th so they totally didn’t ruin anybody’s holiday by firing him despite never giving him more than 2 NHL Centers and sub .900 goaltending. But imagine how terrible it would have been for Dallas if he kept his job but somebody wrote a poorly conceived paid advertisement about firing him.

The writer of the ad was spot on though. That ad was well timed. It got the Oilers right when they were at their Lowest (see what I did there). Well planned though? I could plan on wasting money a bunch of more interesting ways before I start handing it over to the Sun though.

“Word-of-mouth is one thing, but this was sly and mean-spirited.”

Sly

Very Sly indeed.

I WILL NOT ACTUALLY MAKE A POINT

“I will not belabor Kevin Lowe’s status and contribution to Hockey in our city and country.”

If you aren’t actually here to defend Kevin Lowe’s status and contribution to hockey then what was the point of this? Isn’t this a rebuttal? Shouldn’t there be…points…or evidence…or…something? What are you actually trying to accomplish in this limited space that you’ve paid seemingly good money for?

This would have been the perfect spot to support your main man K-Lowe with a salient point about what he has accomplished or will accomplish or is in the midst of accomplishing. Belabor the point. Please. It would be nice to be reminded of him actually doing something positive post-2006.

Damn it, say SOMETHING!

UNIVERSALLY RESPECTED

“And he is respected universally by his peers.”

We don’t actually know this. There are roughly 50 other GM/Presidents of Hockey Ops/Management lackeys that we would put into Kevin Lowe’s immediate peer group collectively in the NHL. I have not polled all of them about their views on Kevin Lowe but there have to be a few who aren’t fans.

I mean there’s the guy down in Calgary who wanted to literally fist-fight Kevin Lowe not all that long ago. The barn was rented and everything. Kevin Lowe called out Bobby Ryan while he was still a very young prospect in Anaheim and a player he had absolutely no need to talk about and Burkie lost it. Their childish feud was well documented. Surely even if the blood has cooled Burke doesn’t exactly hold him up in high regard. 

Jay Feaster seems to take a certain enjoyment from Oiler failures and he was integral to the management of a couple NHL teams. I bet a few wobbly pops into the night he might tell you what he really thinks of old Lowesy.

Then of course there’s Ron Hextall who took control of the Flyers and immediately used Edmonton as the example of how not to go about building a winning culture. He very specifically admonished against the idea of tanking style rebuild, the very method Lowe and Company came up with to bring the Oilers out of the basement and into the penthouse.

Or what about Dean Lombardi who was very upset that the Oilers traded him a player with a busted foot? Surely Mr. Lombardi has some thoughts about the Oilers’ President of Hockey Ops after that one. 

Universally respected? 

I don’t mean to speak for anyone else, but I have my doubts.

THE BROAD PICTURE

“In team-sports, losing (and winning) is a shared experience, one borne by the players, the coaches, and the management.”

Finally, a salient point!

“And regarding our beloved Oilers, everyone deserves an equal portion of the blame.”

Why didn’t you just say that? Oh there’s more. Let’s keep this up!! I think I’m starting to like this guy.

“That said, we must realize that Edmonton is a smaller city, and as such is not vital to the league’s marketing interests. In fact, we would never have gotten into the NHL had it not been for the great Gretzky – whom Peter Pocklington leveraged for a franchise.”

Train_wreck

What the heck was that? What just happened here was a classic case of filler. The entire point is non sequitur. If you remove it completely, nothing changes. If you add it back, nothing changes. 

Why on Earth would the relative size of Edmonton fit into a discussion about Kevin Lowe? Is the implication that because there aren’t 7 million people living in this city that we should be happy Kevin Lowe is the President of Hockey Ops for the Oilers and Deputy Grand Czar of the Oilers Entertainment Group?

And how does Pocklington or Gretzky fit in here too? TELL ME. I NEED TO KNOW!

Stop holding out on me, random advertiser. Tell me all your secrets. Or…have you said too much already? We can get you into some kind of protection program if need be…or social program? I’m not judging.*

ANYONE’S GUESS

“Now I should broach the subject of the beleaguered G.M. Craig MacTavish, an old team-mate of Kevin Lowe’s. How Lowe’s association with the ex-Oiler may impact his own future is anyone’s guess.”

[Rubbing temples furiously] If your thoughts on any matter amount to “Nobody can tell the future” then you should consider not bringing the matter up, let alone PAYING to bring the matter up. You brought up Craig MacTavish, you mouth-breather, say something! 

Anyone’s guess?

Anyone’s guess?!?

How will I fare standing in front of this speeding train?

Anyone’s guess.

Is stuffing this angry raccoon down my pants and dancing to Uptown Funk a bad idea?

Anyone’s guess.

Is paying for an full-page ad in a newspaper to shame a Facebook group a poor investment?

Anyone’s guess.

THE MAN WITH THE MONEY

“Of course, Mr. Katz is the man with the money and he decides who comes and goes. These judgments are not made lightly, however, nor are they left to the wishes of triflers, barroom pundits, or even Internet groupies.”

trifle

Trifle is delicious! I can’t trust anyone who wouldn’t eat that. Look at it! If someone looks at that trifle and says they dont want it, you should call the police immediately and let them know about the suspicious activity you’ve just witnessed. Something shady is going down.

Did this entirely paid ad really just end with its author telling us that it’s Katz’ toy and he’ll do what he wants with it?

Yep, it did.

Thank you “One Who Bleeds Oiler Blue” for imparting with the the wisdom inherent in “The owner will do what he wants.”

And I’m sure the Oilers have made no light decisions about their management at all. They did exhaustive job searches for their GM, Coach, Ex-Coach, Goalie Coach, Assistant GM, and Senior VP of Hockey Ops. These searches included but were not limited to going through a list of current AND former employees. A lot of work went into them.

PLEASE STOP

Please, everyone who can read this message, stop taking out full ads in the newspaper to make your points. It’s a waste of your money. It’s a waste of our time. If you feel like you’ve been trying to say something for years but nobody will listen to you, it’s probably because your point is empty and nobody likes you.

If you aren’t paying money to have your poorly conceived thoughts appear in a dying medium for all to mock, then good job. You are a shining example of what Oiler fans should be doing in times like these: Nothing. 

I can’t believe this is what it has come to.

*I am

  • james_dean

    I got no teeth and i cant pass a math test but my family farm that the city of edmonton bought from me makes me rich enough to do whatever i want.

    I appreaciate your blogs Arch but this isnt circa berlin 1934. Theres no propaganda minister here. Goebbels is dead

    Garbage day. Trash me bra

  • Bucknuck

    You really can’t defend Kevin Lowe in public forums or by the water cooler anymore, so anonymous ads in the paper are really the only avenue to avoid a lynching.

    I give him and MacT a lot of credit for the 2006 cup run.

    Then he traded Ryan Smyth for Magic beans, which an inept scouting staff (also his responsibility) turned into nothing.

    At that point I figure he was about even.

    Then he hired Steve Tambellini… and then losing and losing and losing.

    I used to defend him… not any more.

  • james_dean

    Wow, you care way to much what other people do with their lives/time/money to actually take the time to write that lengthy of an article critizing them.

  • Kenny The Rat

    I really dislike Kevin Lowe being apart of this Oilers organization and I am definitely on board with everyone else to have him go….

    But Matt Hendo you’re correct, I unfollowed the “Kevin Lowe Must Go” group for being exactly what you called them. A bunch of whiners that complain a lot more then just Kevin Lowe.

  • Kenny The Rat

    If any of you trolls who come on here and scream for Lowe’s or Mac Ts head or for Katz to fire himself really think that any one will listen to you and actually follow your suggestions is delusional. I would suggest if you think you really have that kind of power by writing on this or any other blog or paying for a billboard or taking out adds then I can suggest the names of a couple of good phycologists that “may ” be able to help you .Although I doubt it .

  • bradleypi

    I’m a little confused about one thing…
    I am drawing a blank on what klowe said about bobby Ryan?…. I thought the klowe/burke feud was based on klowe offer sheeting Penner after the ducks won the cup. And I’m pretty sure it was burke who bad mouthed bobby Ryan last year saying Ryan wasn’t good enough for the American Olympic team? Am I way off here?

    • Harry2

      It was during the fall out period after the Penner RFA signing. Burke has criticized Lowe for “running his team into the toilet and now trying to take the rest of the league with him”. Lowe responded suggesting that Burke doesn’t know what he is doing as evidenced by Ryan (the 2nd player taken in the Crosby year) as a bust. At that point I think Ryan was two year post draft and hadn’t done a thing. He started to perform better right after Lowe trashed him.

      Really, Lowe involving a 20 year old kid trying to break into the NHL into his feud with Burke is pretty sad.

  • Serious Gord

    The biggest issue with the ad is not that someone paid for it, but that is so badly written and aimless.

    Spend money to advertise your opinion by all means, but fer Chrissakes don’t print the first draft. It reads like the output of an old, well-to-do somewhat senile fan who is on the fringes of the Edmonton establishment who really doesn’t watch much hockey anymore – really not much since the last of the old boys stopped playing.

    Pathetic and sad really.

    • Harry2

      DUDE! There are people on twitter who actually defend Lowe simply by saying, “Well hes not involved in the day to day operations anymore” as if a) thats true which I dont believe for a second and b) as if that excuses Lowe from the last 15 years of garbage. Then they go on to say they dont think firing Lowe would accomplish anything so why bother. Infuriating.

  • THRNHJE

    Guys, just like those who are paying for these articles have their right to waste their money on them, Matt has the right to express his opinion on how idiotic the article posted was and how much of a waste of time it is.

    It’s not like we haven’t beaten to death the idea that we need to get a true #1 defenseman, a better goalie (though I maintain that Chabot was the real problem there), and Yakupov going. This is something going on about our favorite hockey team and he is writing a blog on it. I don’t see how that’s a waste of time.

  • vetinari

    I could have summarized the ad as follows and saved the guy some money:

    “Lay off Kevin Lowe. He doesn’t play the games– the players do. And same for MacT and Katz too. Now get off my lawn.”

    Could have saved the guy a mint if only he (or she) asked.

  • Stank on it

    You don’t ever question Mr. Lowe, and you will show him the respect he deserves. Mr. Lowe has put his heart and soul into this team, he’s brought a wealth of experience, the guy has won something like 11 Stanley Cups, you can’t buy that kind of experience, you’ve got to earn it, and he has. Edmonton is in the gutter, but anyone other than Mr. Lowe would have us in the sewer. Could you imagine how horrible this team would be without our first round picks? Imagine a top line of 13th or 14th overall picks, uh can you say “No thanks, mister whoever you are!” Mr. Lowe has saved us from an even worse fate, and I for one am happy he’s been able to accomplish that.

  • oilersplumber

    SUSPICIOUS

    I have two serious questions about the ad that appeared today. Who really WROTE it, and who really PAID for it? Couldn’t a sports journalist (I know, contradiction in terms) hunt this person down and find out what he/she have to say?

    Rob Ford used to have a radio phone-in show in Toronto. His brother, and other people who worked for Ford, used to phone in and pretend to be other people to defend Rob Ford. Rob Ford himself phoned another station, pretending to be someone else, to defend Rob Ford.

  • LibrarianMike

    I’m so mad I missed this earlier, because my usual FIRE LOWE cry would have been PERFECT.

    As such, I implore the members of the Nation to get off Arch’s ass. He’s smarter than you. You’re all just salty.

  • chickenStew

    If someone puts a statement like this out there for public consumption, they become fair game to receive any critique that is deserving.

    Since this “one who bleeds Oilers blue” decided to expose their deficiencies in expressing a coherent thought, then they are bound to be mocked. And so they should be.

    I don’t care that the intent is to pump up Lowe. We all know that Lowe had his time in this orginization that was positive. We also all know that his time is done now. The fact that the ad poster doesn’t realize this borders on comical, but that is their opinion I suppose.

    The real reason this should be mocked is the way it is presented AND the fact that in a way it lumps the rest of us that “bleed oiler blue” in with some out of touch, thoughtless, fool.

    This bothers me. I like that Arch called out the ad poster.

    ON has arguably some of the most in-tune fans (yes you are all fans) that any hockey club is priveledged to have. Opinions vary, approaches are different, but blatant, uneducated, force feeding of drivel is a big bright target.

  • “It never fails to amaze me how many people defend Kevin Lowe or any other member of the Oilers brass. It really doesn’t. They could drive a truck right through some people’s front window or ruin Sunday dinner by showing up loaded and hitting on the lady of the house and still some people will call it part of the plan”

    They must be liberals.

  • Harry2

    Mr. Henderson,

    Some people.such as myself are just plain fed up with this garbage. Just like you said, “I cant believe it has come to this”.
    The FB ad may have been in poor taste and a waste of money but it has 100% Oiler fandom behind it.

    I agree, I can not believe it has come to this but, Edm’s record since Lowe has been GM/VP is more than enough proof for me.

    facebook.com/lowemustgo