Ten Reasons Why Jordan Eberle Should Be The Next Captain

Here are the top ten reasons that Jordan Eberle will make the perfect Oilers captain. 

Earlier today, trusty(ish) general manager Peter Chiarelli confirmed that the team will get something new for the first time in a year – a player to wear the ‘C’, starting before the 2016-17 season opener. 

Last year, I would have suggested that of the four alternate captains – Taylor Hall, Jordan Ebere, Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, and ex-captain Andrew Ference – Hall was probably the best choice for this nomination. 

#RIP that idea. 

Now that Hall is gone, though, I have a new number one candidate: my gap-toothed boy Ebs. I think he’d do a bang-up job, and I have a whole list of reasons why:

1. He’s great with the kids

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A good captain is a good leader – and good leaders are, first and foremost, good with children. 

Connor McDavid had a great first season, minus the whole ‘being broken for half the year’ thing – and Eberle was a big part of that, serving as a great linemate for the rookie phenom. 

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Beyond the numbers, though, Eberle always seemed to be there, just to help his teammate out. Whether it was to listen to him or to praise him for being great, 14 made a concerted effort to include his newest, youngest pal last year. What could be better in a captain?!

2. He cares about animals

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Look at that embrace! 

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LOOK AT THAT LOVE. 

Amirite? 

3. He’s been a great talent over the last handful of seasons, despite playing on a team full of utter garbage

For more on this, check out what I wrote last week. 

A hell of a lot of Oilers managed to underperform in relation to expectations in the last decade, which was justified in part because the franchise itself had dissolved into such a sideshow joke. Eberle, though, didn’t fit that bill; he actually managed to remain a sustainable top six level of production over the entirety of his career. That’s leadership. 

4. He pays attention to detail

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LEADERSHIP BEHAVIOUR ALERT. 

Remember when Tom Gilbert and Andrew Cogliano let us know that Sam Gagner was basically a giant slob who didn’t mind living in his own filth and sleeping on beds without sheets? Total red flag. 

Jordan Eberle, on the other hand, is far more detail-oriented. He’ll remember the little things, making him an excellent captain. 

5. He wants to win

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#JUSTWINBABY

6. He’s an advocate of equality

As the years go by, more and more players have been joining in speaking out in favor of LGBTQ rights. Ebs has been a part of this, as well – but unlike a lot of the players who have allied with the You Can Play Project, Eberle’s support dates back to 2012. 

Obviously, he leads socially by example. What could be better??

7. He has great food takes

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SAME, JORDAN, SAME

8. It would make Wanye happy

If my boss is happy, I’m happy. And if I’m happy, you guys get better content. 

This checks out as a very valid and reasonable excuse to name someone captain of a professional sports franchise that I get media access to exactly five times a year! 

9. It won’t rush McJesus

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For the last decade, the Oilers have been in a neverending rebuild, full of rotating saviours in the form of young, exciting blue chip pieces. 

We’re now on our third group of future icons in that ten year time frame. Let’s not rush this group, yes? 

By giving Eberle the ‘C’, McDavid gets more time to develop. Then, in a few years’ time, the torch is passed and everything comes up smelling like roses. 

#FLAWLESSLOGIC. 

10. He’ll bring the fashion game 

Possibly the biggest contribution Andrew Ference made to the Oilers while captain was his impeccable fashion game. Motion for this fashion-forward trend among captains to continue.