OK, we admit we normally don’t watch Off The Record with Michael Landsberg. We don’t have much interest in watching a third-string CFL referee get interviewed, or a former WWE wrestler discuss his off-season training regimen. Normally, we’d rather watch a Jon and Kate Plus Eight marathon on A&E than give Landsberg 20 seconds of our precious time.
But as we surfed passed yesterday with the old remote-control device, we saw Ray Emery, disgraced Sens goalie, has gone to play in the Russian Continental League. It starts off with Emery smirking as he introduces himself as being part of Atlant Mytishchi or whatever the name of the team is. The fact he laughs as he tries to remember the team that has signed him shows the level of commitment this douchebag will bring and how terrible this interview will be.
Credit to Landsberg for even asking the tough questions—it was pretty classic seeing the look on Emery’s face when Landsberg asked him if he had a drug problem. Reply: A smirking “no.” Landsberg asked him if partying affects his play. Reply: A smirking “no.” Landsberg asked him why he’s so late for team events. Reply: A smirking “I guess I’m not good at showing up on time.”
We’ve seen some arrogant douchebags in our day, particularly when we attended the 2002 World Douchebag Championships in Sweden. Emery upsets the apple cart on a winning team and asks for a trade, and he was shut down. Then in the off-season he got his wish: the Sens tried and shop him around he was passed on by all 30 NHL teams, including LA who will basically trade or sign anyone with a pulse. Then he was bought out of a three-year contract. Yup, plenty here to look back on with pride and say “I have earned the right to act like a complete ass.”
For the entire eight-minute interview, we were cheering for Lansberg to decide aloud “Hey, this guy isn’t in the NHL anymore. This is one of the worst interviews I have ever had,” and then lean over and smack the 15-carat rings out of Emery’s ears.
Emeryan-type attitudes might fly in the NBA, NFL or some American NHL teams, but you’re playing hockey, Ray. In Canada. Home of broken teeth, broken noses and a “put me in the game, coach” attitude. You seem to fit in like Michael Jackson at an elementary school Christmas Play. Not wanted, not welcome. But for some reason: moonwalking.
Among the gems from Emery:
“It wasn’t my fault we were losing games.”
“Hindsight is 20/20 I shouldn’t have done some of those things. But I’m not losing any sleep over it.”
“I have a problem showing up on time… I guess.”
If you’re wondering, nothing has ever been Ray Emery’s fault. Nothing will ever be Emery’s fault and he’s apparently happy to be shipped to Russia. Asked why he didn’t try and find a job in the NHL: “I would rather not play in the NHL at a tenth the pay.”
OK Ray, you get your wish. Get the hell out of here you limp-wristed little bitch.
You can watch the whole interview here.