1. Lock yourself in your parents’ basement and practice your shot accuracy. Mission accomplished, brother. You shot at 15.9% this year and that’s another career-high. Normally, one should be concerned about setting a career high in shooting%, but RNH’s career average is 11.5% and that includes two down years of 5.1 and 9%, which tells me that floating around last season’s total shouldn’t be out of the question. Not to mention, playing on Connor’s wing will set you up for some tap-ins and should boost that number up a few points. Keep having your stick on the ice, my man, because Connor will find you.
2. Improve your faceoffs. Another check for the Nuge. He just put up a career-high on the dot and floated around 50% all year long before tailing off a bit at the end of the season. There’s definitely room to improve, but I won’t ignore progress. Nicely done, sir. Keep working on it and you’ll get to where you want to be. And besides, part of the improvement in this area comes with having stronger wrists and forearms which gives you an excuse to take a break from your day to… clean your room.
3. Have you volunteered to play on the wing? Last summer, I talked about how good Nuge would look on the wing with McDavid and boy was I ever right. I mean, it’s not exactly a stretch to predict that two of the smartest players on the team would work well together, so it was nice to finally have the coaching staff put it together, albeit towards the end of the season. Late or not, the McNuge duo is a beautiful thing that I hope will continue well into their 30s.
4. I want you to start working on your skating again. I have no factual proof that Nuge improved his skating this year but I could swear that he looked a step quicker than he did in 2016-17. Should I count it as another item checked off the list? I’m gonna count it. I still want Nuge to get faster still, but I think he had some extra bounce in his stride this year and I dig it.

1. If you’re going to play on Connor’s wing for the foreseeable future, which Gord willing is the plan moving forward, then I’m going to need you to spend some time learning his habits. Just like you spend time researching horse news so that you can make the best possible decisions when it comes to your four-legged friends, I need you to do the same thing with Connor. Talk to him, watch all the video, and do whatever it takes to know where he’s going to be on the ice before he does. If you can blend your hockey minds together then there’s no limit to what you two could be capable of. If anyone on this team has the mind to do it it’s you. Make it happen.
2. You’ve got a great shot and I need you to use it more. Last season, in the 62 games you played, you had 151 shots on goal, which translates to 2.43 shots per game. Considering you’ll be playing with the best player and setup man on the planet, you’re going to have to pump those numbers up. I know that 2.43 shots per game is roughly around your career average, but there’s room to improve there. If we can get you up over three shots per game then you’ll be filling the net with ginos, and with Connor setting you up on the regular then that should be completely doable.
3. Keep working on your skating. I know how you might be confused because I just told you a minute ago that your skating work from last summer was appreciated but that doesn’t mean you can’t still keep working on it, especially when you’re playing beside Connor McDavid. Now, I’m not expecting you to be as fast as Connor is, that’s not humanly possible without major software upgrades, but it would do you a world of good if you can add a couple KMs/hr to the top end.
4. I know you just got engaged a few weeks ago (congratulations btw!) and I want to talk about how much time you’re going to be spending on planning this wedding. Don’t get me wrong, you need to do everything in your power to give your wonderful fiance the day she’s always dreamed about, but I think you should hire some major help to make that happen. Not only do you have the cash to make it happen, but hiring a wedding planner to take care of that crap those details will free up the time you need to keep working on your game. Don’t want to hire a wedding planner? No problem. I understand being frugal — I still use the Student Union Ticket Pack. Fortunately, our very own Chris the Intern is getting married this summer and I’ve watched him plan his wedding out over the last couple of years so I know he’s got the experience you need to get this job done. Not only will I make him plan your wedding for free but I know that he will put the power of Two Hills into it for you. With your cash and Chris’ know how, you’ll have one of the best weddings anyone has ever seen.
5. Seriously, let me follow you on Instagram. I requested this follow ages ago and now I need you to let ol’ Baggo in the door. Thank you.

NUGENT-HOPKINS’ CAREER SO FAR