First Star, Worst Star: November 29, 2015

I hope all of our American readers had a great Thanksgiving weekend, ate gluttonous amounts of food and punched someone in the mouth over a $300 TV at a Walmart. Tis the season, and tis the time for First Star, Worst Star!

This one would sting a lot more had the Oilers not won this game, HOWEVER; 

For my money Evgeni Malkin is one of the most entertaining players in the NHL on and off the ice. 

Wether he’s hanging out with furry friends

or acting like one

he just always seems to be an endless source of fun times. And Saturday night was no different, when he decided to turn the Game Genie on and absolutely embarrass the Oilers. 

Honestly if this happened to you in a game of NHL 16 you would complain that your friend is being cheap and that the game is unrealistic. My suggestion to increase scoring in the NHL? Just clone like 50 Geno’s and let them into the wild. SIMPLE!

It was a bad weekend for reckless cross checks. First off, the one that launched 1000 hot takes, Brandon Dubinsky absolutely smashes Sidney Crosby in the back of the neck with a brutal shot. 

These two have had one of the best rivalries in recent NHL history, so this wasn’t super surprising. And while I don’t necessarily think Dubinsky went in there planning to do this on purpose, he looks SUPER cutthroat when he follows it up with breaking his stick over Crosby’s back and tossing it aside like a WWF villain. 

One day later it was Carlo Colaiacovo on the receiving end, this time from a cross check to the throat via the Pred’s Viktor Arvidsson. 

Colaiacovo would leave the game with a dented trachea *rubs throat nervously* and Arvidsson received 5 and a game and will surely be hearing from the DoPS. 

This is the sad state the NHL is in right now. Back in my day all you had to worry about was the odd Chris Pronger stomp on the back of your leg or Claude Lemieux hitting you from behind, face first into an open bench door. That was the way of the world back then AND WE LIKED IT! These players now-a-days, with their Tweetstagram and their Snaptopias don’t have a healthy respect for an open bench door like they ought to. #RespectOpenBenchDoors