OMG. Chris Pronger totally shot a piece of debris on the ice at Ben Eager. Someone call the United Nations! Call an emergency session of the War Crimes Tribunal in the Hague! Call an elite task force of Navy Seals to shield our precious eyes from this inhuman act.

Please. Give us a break. We couldn’t be happier that the Father of the Year 2006 is down 2-0 in SCF10.

What a nerd.

Ah yes, spring is in the air. The lawns are growing green and lush, bees are buzzing, birds are trying to nail them (or such is our knowledge of biology) and the Capitals kicked off their home opener last night at Telus Field.

We can’t help but love the poor Edmonton Capitals. No attendance, no press, no love from the City of Edmonton. Clearly they aren’t the focus of Kay-Z and his crew of business execs and the HR policy for concession stand staffers at Telus and the Capitals staff seems to be this:

"Do you want to work for the Oilers? Too bad. How about the Oil Kings? Nope, you are way too slow to be working there. Don’t worry slugger. We have just the opportunity for you down in the river valley."

We bought 2 hotdogs and 2 beers (for a piddling $12 beans we might add) and the hapless concession stand worker looked us square in the eye and said "I don’t have enough change for you Sir." Rather then asking a coworker for change, he simply asked for the next person in line to come to the till, brushing us aside.

We looked on in disbelief as the next person in line was served and then casually asked "now that you have more change in the till, do you think you can piece together the $8 to give us our change now?"

He looked us dead in the eye for the second time in as many minutes and said "sorry, No."

Luckily the Caps are far superior to their front office and concessionary staff and pulled out 5-4 win over Maui Na Koa Ikaika which we originally thought was some sort of touring Japanese National Team. A win is a win though and those Hawaiians didn’t know what hit em.

Last year every single event at Telus Field was followed or preceeded by a firework barrage that set off war flashbacks for every veteran soldier within 100 miles. This year – nothing. Now the nearby resident in us is happy that the firework budget has been scaled back but the overpowering Caps fan in us says "where the fireworkz at?"

We have a sneaking suspicion the Caps will be contending for the championship banner/trophy/gift certificate to Home Hardware at the end of the season.

Get them fireworks ready Katz Baseball Group – you’re gonna need em.