I’m not sure what Wanye is on about with his references to a kick-ass addition to Oilersnation, but I can tell you my vote is that we open a new bureau in the hockey-mad city of Scottsdale*. I will staff it.

Having spent the past four days painstakingly researching the viability of expanding the Oilersnation brand to the hockey-mad city of Scottsdale*, rest assured, I will do whatever it takes to get Wanye on board with this.

Given the intense rivalry that has developed between the Edmonton Oilers and Phoenix Coyotes, the time has obviously come for this idea. It is also timely, given the much-anticipated game between the teams tonight. It will be a grind, considering I arrived back in Edmonton just last night, but I will fly back to Arizona this afternoon.

I see Oilersnation based in the trendy Hotel Valley Ho** in the hockey-mad city of Scottsdale*. In addition, I see a real opportunity here to do some slick cross-promotion — remote shows for every Wednesday and Thursday edition of the Jason Gregor Show from lovely Zuzu Lounge at the Hotel Valley Ho** until 2016.

To make this happen, I took the liberty of spending last Friday and Saturday night laying the groundwork for this exciting possibility with the management of the Zuzu Lounge at the Hotel Valley Ho**.

While I very much like the idea of the Brownleebot 5000, it will take time to perfect this innovation. By comparison, I’ve already done much of the legwork required to open the Oilersnation bureau in the hockey-mad city of Scottsdale*. We can be up and running immediately (read: tonight).

To make this possible, I’m happy to announce I’ve enlisted the services of hardcore Oilers fans Serena and Amy*** (showing their support for our favourite hockey team in the picture above) to aid in establishing help with day-to-day operations. Their ongoing participation as my personal assistants has already been discussed at length and requires only the approval of the Oilersnation board of governors.

In addition to all the above, I have already agreed to terms on sponsorship deal with Barry Meguiar (pictured below), host of Car Crazy and CEO of the fine line of car care products****. Meguiar has been a huge fan of the Oilers for many years and is happy to be aboard*****.

 

I am convinced the new Oilersnation bureau staffed by hardcore Oilers fans Serena and Amy*** and yours truly at the Hotel Valley Ho** in the hockey-mad city of Scottsdale* is only the start of something big. If scouting players from Cabo San Lucas worked for Barry Fraser and the Oilers, this can work for us.

 I await your feedback******.

*It is impossible to find one shred of evidence that anybody in Scottsdale even knows the Phoenix Coyotes exist. I did, however, meet a person with a wicked Escalade on 24s at the Barrett Jackson car auction who had heard of Nikolai Khabibulin.

**Mention given in consideration of accommodation, a bar tab that you would not believe and the replacement of cabana drapes that somehow caught on fire.

***Hardcore something or other. I paid them.

****I get a sh!tload of expensive product for life because I told Meguiar I write for a Canadian website that gets 12 million hits a day.

*****Barry has heard of Edmonton.

******You know this is a f*cking lie.