99 out of 100 years, a game the same day as the trade deadline would leave the honorable Citizens of the OilersNation asking questions like "how fast can we scramble a jet to go pick up "insert new player here" so that he can play tonight?" We would also be speculating wildly about how well the new player would fit into the overall structure and would have convinced ourselves that the Oilers would in fact go 17-3 down the stretch to make the playoffs.

Not this year though Nation.

No, this year we are left with junk, injuries and a lot of tears*

*mostly ours


Oh hey Chicago Blackhawks. How’s things? Oh, really. You are second in the Western Conference you say. Your team is filled to the brim with verile young guns looking to shred our Bantam AAA defensive corps and pepper our third string AHL goalies with shots?

Easy does it there. You have never had to deal with the likes of a defensive corps like the one about to be iced by the Oilers tonight:

1. Chorney

2. Strudwick

3. Gilbert

4. Peckham

5. The ghost of Nick Stadjuhar

6. Some other 15 year old who will earn more in this one day in the NHL than he will in the rest of his entire career.

Still don’t think that a beat down of the highest power is within your sights Chicago? What if we reminded you that our goalies consisted of Jeff Deslauriers and Devan Dubnyk. Would that make you feel any better? What about the fact tha-

No, no. Wait.

*shakes head sadly*

We can’t be this negative. We would gladly part with a limb, an eyeball or an organ for this team to be even a 7th place also ran again. We won’t let them beat us down. Then the terrorists win, Nation and we can’t have that now can we? Surely somewhere or other there has to be a silver lining to tonight’s game.




This game isn’t expendable like our poor red shirted away team member shown above. No, this could be one of the most important Oilers games you ever come across if you lived to be 1000 years old.

For you see it simply makes a fellow tingle from head to toe and see that the Sports Select over under on the game is a mere 5.5 goals. If we had more time before the game starts we would seriously consider proposing that the entire nation bands together and buys a 12 million dollar ticket.

When we won we could buy out several contracts on behalf of the team and rebuild the team in any fashion we saw fit. But one hour before puck drop there simply isn’t time for that Nation. But there is time for you.

Remortgage the house. Sell an organ. Borrow as much money from organized crime as they will lend you at whatever interest rate they offer you without a worry in the world.

Bet your entire life savings on this game being a blowout.  Or you could put a dollar down on the Oilers winning and hope for the best. Either way when you win, you’re rich. 

Financial freedom on a Tuesday. See? There was a silver lining after all.


Makes you wonder what happened to Moreau leaving doesn’t it? Seemed pretty much in the bag by all accounts. What do you figure went awry with the Ducks?