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We’re Number Last… We’re Number Last!

Amber McCormick
14 years ago
We’re the last team in the standings. We’re in 30th place. We’re the #1 losers. We’re the polar opposite of first place. No matter how you say it, it hurts. Not only do we have to put up with the mockery of Flames fans (there’s one in every office) but we also have to deal with the little voice in our heads saying, “Why are you so offended? You know they’re right.”
A few people have mentioned to me, “Hey Amber, haven’t seen anything from you for a while.” It’s true. What was the point? I went to a dark, dark place after our bajillionth loss in row. I didn’t want to come here spewing negativity and ill-advised anger. I wanted to deal with the loss of a dream like an adult; getting drunk alone while watching Ishtar just to prove that things can always get worse.
It seems that there are more questions than answers at this point. Who wants out? Who’s on the block next? Will Pocklington go to jail? Did Brad and Angelina really split up? Oh the humanity!
I’m at a loss. I really am. If someone would have told me in October that this is where we’d be at in January I would have called them a fool. Alas, this is our reality. The season will go without much cause for celebration as we anticipate the next. The summer months will be filled with the optimistic ramblings of drunkards on sunny patios. Speculation of why next season will be “The One” and why it was still a good idea to get rid of MacT.
I’m no fortune teller and I don’t know what the future holds. I just pray that we come to a place where we can celebrate our mediocrity and hold it close to our hearts. That’s the world I one day want to live in.

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